To Truth, or To Dare?
by Frozencake
Summary: This is slightly AU. Takes place during Season 1. The team is bored, and ends up stuck doing Truth or Dare. Chaos ensues as scam marriages, prank phone calls, and nosy mentors are thrown into the mix. Reviewers get to play a big part! Terrible title, I know. Formerly "To Dare, or To Truth?"
1. Chapter 1

**Summary: **This is slightly AU. Takes place during Season 1. The team is bored, and ends up stuck doing Truth or Dare. Reviewers get to play a part!.

**Changes:** Takes place during late Season 1. Red Arrow is part of the team, but isn't a clone, and he doesn't have the annoying urge to hate on Artemis every second. Artemis and Wally aren't an item. Superman and M'gaan are. Zatanna is with the team.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing and no one.

**July 10, 9 A.M. Mount Justice**

It was a slow. A _really_ slow day. No missions. No world to save. No rampaging supervillains. In fact, there hadn't been a mission for the team in over a week.

_This is soooo boring _thought a 14 year old Boy Wonder to himself as he lay lazily on the couch. In the Kitchen, Artemis and Wally were arguing over some pointless thing, for like the _umpteenth_ time this morning. Laying on Wolf were M'gaan and Connor. Red Arrow and Aqualad were having some sort of staring contest. Zatanna was magically levitating in the center of the room, while seemingly taking a nap. None of them were in their costumes, although Robin still retained his signature dark shades.

Suddenly, Red Tornado appeared, flying down from his room.

"I have been summoned to the Watchtower. I shall be leaving you to yourselves."

This prompted a serious of groans from the bored teens.

"Can't we come too? Is there nothing for us to do?" asked Aqualad.

"I'm afraid not. I must be going, so you shall all have to entertain yourselves." replied Red Tornado in a brisk tone. With that, he flew out.

"Great. It's only 9 A.M and I can feel my brains melting." muttered Robin.

"I agree." said a certain levitating girl.

"We should do something." she continued.

"Zatanna is right. This boredom is going to be the end of me." stated Aqualad, finally breaking his staring contest with Red Arrow.

"How about we do truth or dare?" asked Wally, zipping in from the kitchen.

"Of course _you _would suggest such a thing, Baywatch." retorted Artemis, following in swiftly after the speedster.

"Well now-" began Wally, ready as ever for yet another argument with the blonde archer.

"Enough! I'm sick of you two, and I'm sick of this absurdly slow day!" groaned Connor.

"I concur. This day has certainly left me underwhelmed." agreed Robin.

"Why shouldn't we play truth or dare? I saw it on an Earth tv show, and it look like fun!" perked up M'gaan.

"Why? Why? Because truth or dare with this, this-_sicko,_ is like committing suicide!" exasperated Artemis.

"What's the matter? Got something to hide? Or are you just chicken?" asked Wally, now wearing his signature smirk.

Artemis was about to being whipping the smirk off his face with words, when Red Arrow finally spoke.

"Good god. We've got nothing better to do, so I don't see how bad a game of truth or dare can be." he stated lamely, knowing full well how bad it could be, and secretly suppressing his evil glee.

Across the room on the couch, Robin felt the same.

"Yeah, I agree with Roy. Let's get this game started!" he said.

"Fine." grumbled Artemis, much to the joy of Wally.

"Everyone in a circle!" he said, taking his place, which just so happened to be next to Red Arrow. And Robin. Both of whom had plans…evil plans.

"Alright, so who's first?" asked Connor.

"How about you Baywatch? Or are you too chicken?" asked Artemis, grinning slyly.

The others grinned, knowing Wally was caught in his own trap.

"Fine. Fine." mumbled Wally.

"So, truth or dare, Wally?" asked Robin

"Oh no. I'm not stupid enough to say dare. Truth." replied Wally, smug as ever.

Or at least he was, until he saw the evil glint in his friend's face.

**Ok, so I choose truth or dare, but the reviewers can choose the question or dare! You can even choose who gets to be asked, and who gets to ask next…..**


	2. Chapter 2

**Well I've got some nice ideas from the reviews, especially from Zatanna Carrile. Thank you all. I shall try to update with one chapter a day.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one. Although if I did, this show wouldn't have ended in the tragic mess it did end in.**

**July 10, 9:05 A.M. Mount Justice**

Robing smiled evilly, basking in the glory of the moment, taking his sweet time as he watched his best friend sweat.

Finally, after what seemed forever to the speedster, Robin opened his mouth.

"Weeeelll, let's see what. What to ask, what to ask…" taunted Robin, still smiling evilly.

A few more moments of silence passed, before Wally couldn't take it anymore.

"Come one man! Just ask me a question and let's get this over with!" the speedster nearly yelled out.

"Well, since you seem extra excited, let's ask an extra juicy question." said Robin, his ever so evil smirk growing so large, one would wonder if it hurts his face.

"So, Wally, we all know just how much you and Artemis looove to argue. Which brings me to my question…"

Wally nearly chocked on his own breath, realizing where Robin was going.

"Do you love Artemis?"

At this point, Wally did choke on his own breath, wheezing and coughing uncontrollably, earning him a few snickers from the others, while M'gaan actually looked concerned, and Artemis involuntarily felt every muscle in her body freeze for a few seconds.

Red Arrow patted Wally on the back a few times.

"There, there, baby. Now answer the question, or do I have to wipe your spit with a bib first?" snickered Red Arrow.

"Traitor." mumbled Wally as he regained his voice, glaring at both Red Arrow and Robin.

"Quit stalling and answer the question." stated Robin.

"Love is a….strong word." came the hesitant reply.

"So you answer no?" asked Robin

"Well, it's not quite simple. Our relationship is rather complicated." came the hesitant reply.

"How complicated can it be? You two spend all this time together, allegedly arguing, and you totally freaked out when she died during that training simulation." intervened Connor, who seemed the only one neither enjoying nor displeased by the turn of events.

However, his comment did not go unnoticed by Artemis, who eyes widened ever so slightly. Most didn't notice. But Robin and Zatanna did.

"It's..well…argh! The answer is no! Now bug off!" replied Wally, hoping to end the conversation there.

Unfortunately for him, Robin was very persistent, and was already prepping his evil plans.

"Now, it's my turn! Kaldur, you're up!" perked up M'gaan.

"Ok." replied the Atlantian. He didn't seem worried at all. M'gaan was sure to be easy on him.

"Truth or dare?" she asked

"Dare." he replied, because he was sure she would be unable to come up with a bad dare.

"Ok…hmmm…" thought the Martian for a few seconds.

"Ok! I got it. I saw this one on one of those 70s shows, so I plan on trying it out. Kaldur, I dare you to kiss every girl here, on the lips, except me of course, and tell me which one has the worst breath!" exclaimed M'gaan.

For a moment no one moved, their eyes fixated on M'gaan. Actually, this happened for more like several moments.

"Wh-what?" fumbled out Kaldur.

"Come on! You picked Dare, so no you have to follow through with it!" said M'gaan.

"Never knew you could be so devious…" muttered Kaldur as he got up, awkwardly looking around.

He settled for Zatanna first, quickly giving her a peck on the lips. It was awkward for everyone. Except for robin, whose eyes narrowed into slits as he saw this.

Then Kaldur turned to Artemis, which a whole other can of awkward. Artemis wasn't having any of it though.

"Oh, just get it over with already." she mumbled, trying to keep up her façade of emotional detachment, which was hard given the revelation Conner had revealed to her only moments earlier.

Kaldur was once again forced to awkwardly give another one of his female teammates a quick peck on the lips. This time, it was Wally who glared, and he wasn't as discreet as Robin.

This time Red Arrow was the one looking smug, as he caught the speedster glare.

"Well, whose breath was worse?" asked M'gaan.

"Well, it was Artemis. Sorry, but you have garlic bread breath. Probably from that sandwich you just had in the Kitchen." replied Kaldur.

"No problem." mumbled Artemis.

"Weeell, this has been mighty fun, but I do believe it is _my_ turn to ask someone. So, _Robin_, truth or dare?" asked Red Arrow, now smiling with evil glee at the Boy Wonder.

Robin, for all his ingenuity, was too stubborn to back down from a challenge.

"Dare." replied defiantly.

"Ok then, boy Wonder. I dare you and Zatanna to be tied up for the next three rounds. _Face to face._ In that janitor's closet over there."

"Wha-hey! That's no fair. You can't drag Zatanna into this!" exclaimed Robin.

"Actually, he can." perked up Wally, eager to avenge himself.

Robin sighed and turned to Zatanna, who proceeded to cast one of her magical spells.

Like that, a rope appeared from nowhere, tying the two up, and floating them off into the nearby closer.

Wally zipped to the closet, closed the door, and zipped back, looking smug as ever.

"Well those two sure look _real_ comfy." he said rather loudly, so that Robin and Zatanna could hear.

"I. Will. Kill. You." came the stiff reply from Robin, who was trying desperately to avoid contact with Zatanna's magica-err, _above average_, eyes.

Zatanna herself didn't find the situation as uncomfortable as Robin did. After all, you only get to see the Boy Wonder squirm a few times in your life. Why not make the best of it?

Meanwhile, back outside the closet…

"My turn." stated Connor gruffly.

He scanned the room, before stopping on Artemis.

"What's it going to be Artemis, Truth, or Dare?" he asked, sounding far more sinister than the others, despite not changing his voice at all.

**Haha. I'm a troll, leaving you guys on edge like this. Thanks for the support, and keep those idea filled reviews coming in! You guys are truly evil, putting these poor heroes through such emotional turmoil. See you tomorrow, and bring your evil thinking caps!**


	3. Chapter 3

**It's a weekend, so let's see how many chapters we can cram into here! We have some nice ideas in the reviews, and let's keep them coming people! I'm beginning to see how I'm going to play this out towards the end, but you're going to have to wait and find out….**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one.**

**July 10, 9:17 A.M, Mount Justice**

Artemis knew she was in trouble. She just knew. So far, _no one_ had managed to escape being screwed in this accursed game.

_Damn you Wally._

"I pick dare." she replied, maintaining her "I don't care" persona. It was a fatal mistake.

Across from her, Connor's face didn't change emotion one bit as he took a quick moment to think.

"Ok. I dare you to spend the rest of the game….on _Wally's lap._"

Wally, who had been sipping on a smoothie he had just grabbed from the kitchen, suddenly inhaled half his smoothie, only for it to come spurting up his nose.

"Calm down Baywatch, you're not getting any action." replied Artemis as he continued coughing up his smoothie, unable to fully comprehend what was going on.

Artemis, her face frozen in a scowl aimed at Connor, quickly maneuvered herself onto Wally's lap, all without taking her laser glare away from Connor.

He didn't seem to notice.

Wally however, had a very different reaction. He felt the heat rise to his cheeks as he found himself inhaling the intoxicating scent rising off of Artemis's hair. And neck. And back.

_Wow. What shampoo is that...It's so...dangerous. Keep your head together Wall-man._

"Don't do anything stupid, Baywatch." Artemis murmured low enough for only her and Wally to hear.

If possible, Wally blushed even more.

Meanwhile…in a small closet not so far away….

_This is it…I'm a goner…_.

Robin thoughts drifted off into a vast space of nothingness as he found himself helplessly staring into the blue orbs that made up Zatanna's eyes. Of course, his sunglasses hid this, but the blush on his cheeks was a dead giveaway.

"Don't worry Robin, only one more round to go. And it's my turn." she said. But in such close proximity, her voice only raised the hair on the back of Robin's neck.

"Hey! Can you guys hear me?" asked Zatanna

A general chorus of "yeah" and "yes" came, with one grunt from you know who.

"Ok….M'gaan, Truth or Dare?" asked Zatanna.

"Ooh!Oooh! I pick….dare!" exclaimed M'gaan, sadly unaware of just how dangerous the game she was playing.

Zatanna smirked, thinking of what to do next. At this point, Robin found himself unable to breath, and was seriously wondering whether Zatanna had put some spell over him.

_Batman can get a new girlfriend every other day. But nooo...he can't trickle down some of that stuff to me._

"I dare you to shapeshift…into a chicken, and stay that way the next three rounds!" said Zatanna, giggling.

M'gaan frowned, but remained committed to the game, and shapeshifted into a chicken, albeit a green one.

Connor was not particularly happy to see his Martian girlfriend shaped shifted into a chicken, and his face conveyed this, but only for a little before he plucked up a chicken M'gaan and put her on his lap, stroking her feathers while he remained leaning against Wolf. The scene would have been comical had it been anyone but Connor.

"Oof", stumbled Robin as he tripped his way out of the closet. He and Zatanna were freed, although Robin was still "recovering".

"Have a nice time in there?" asked Wally, always looking for a chance to exercise his smugness.

"Why do you ask? You enjoying yourself over there?" retorted Robin as he sat down on the couch, right next to Zatanna.

That silenced Wally, and returned his blush.

"Ok, my turn." stated Kaldur, turning to Red Arrow.

"Truth or Dare?" asked Kaldur.

"Truth." replied Red Arrow.

"Who is this mystery woman you are dating? Full name, Arrow." asked Kaldur, smirking. Everyone seemed to be smirking a lot today.

Red Arrow tensed visibly, gritting his teeth.

_Of course he would ask that question._

"I'm not dating anyone." came the terse reply.

"Ah ah ah. You're seeing someone. You admitting to that before, remember?" pressed Kaldur.

"Argh…her name…is Jade." replied Red Arrow.

Artemis tensed, thinking of her sister...and that one kiss with Red Arrow.

_No. It can't be. That would be absurd._

She pushed the thought out of her mind.

"Full name." continued Kaldur.

"I don't know her last name."

"Fair enough." replied Kaldur, not bothering to press and see why Red Arrow didn't know the last name of his girlfriend. He chalked it up to surface world customs.

"Finally. _My _turn." exclaimed Wally, ready to extract gleeful revenge.

He scanned the room, looking for his victim.

_Connor..no. M'gaan…no. Artemis…definitely no. Robin….YES._

"Boy Wonder, time to punch your ticket, again. Truth or Dare?" asked Wally.

"I'm not going to chicken out like you. Dare." replied Robin, staring down his best friend.

"Fatal mistake, my friend." replied Wally, as the room went silent, with everyone waiting to see just what the speedster had up his sleeve. He was after all, the one who wanted to play the game so bad.

Well, aside from M'gaan, who was making various chicken noises.

* * *

**Another cliffhanger. DUN DUN DUN! Keep those reviews coming in guys and girls. What do you all want Robin to do? And I know everyone has been "truth or dared" except for Connor, but I don't know what do with him…Maybe you guys can help. I'll try and update again today if you guys keep up the flow of ideas! Thanks for all the support!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Aaaand were back. Love the suggestions, so keep them coming in. Second chapter in one day, coming up! I know it's been pretty much fluff and humor so far, but I'm thinking of throwing in some romance-y angst or something like that. Depends on what you guys think, so make sure to comment your opinion on that in the reviews.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one. If I did, this would be airing on TV.**

**July 10, 9:25 A.M, Mount Justice**

"I dare you to…wear a pink tutu. For the next three rounds." stated Wally, smug as ever.

Robin gritted his jaws, and narrowed his eyes, while clenching his fists.

"What's that matter Rob. You chicken?" taunted Wally.

"No. But we don't have a pink tutu." replied Robin between gritted teeth, knowing full well Wally wouldn't have made the dare unless…

"Actually Boy Woner…we _do_ have a pink tutu. Right-" Wally reached out from underneath the couch behind him to pull out a pink tutu.

_Of course._

"-here." he finished, smugly, as he threw the tutu as the Boy Wonder.

"Well, go ahead. Put it on. There's a closet right there." continued Wally, satisfied with his revenge. His satisfaction appeared to be contagious, because most of the others were snickering, except for Connor of course, and even Artemis cracked a smug smile.

Robin stormed into the closet, mumbling vile threats towards Wally only heard by Connor's super-hearing capable ears.

"Finally….my turn!" exclaimed Artemis.

_It's about time…_

She looked towards her teammates, and immediately discarded Wally. I mean, she was _on_ him. Anything bad she did to him he could most definitely retaliate to. M'gaan was still a chicken. Connor was.._Connor._

Artemis grinned slyly.

"Truth or dare, Connor?"

Connor replied almost immediately.

"Dare."

He had no intention of answering private questions and he doubt Artemis could bring forth a challenging dare. He was, after all, _the_ Superboy. What could possible happen?

"I dare you to put one and half _kilograms_ of solid ice in your pants, and let it melt there." replied Artemis, cool as a cucumber.

Connor tensed up ever so slightly, before asking, "Where am I supposed to get that much ice?"

"Ahem. Zatanna?" asked Artemis.

"Erucorp eci ni sih stnap!" stated Zatanna, and lo and behold, a series of giant bulges appeared in Connor's pants. The ice on skin contact wasn't exactly enjoyable, to say the least.

Connor's face grimaced into one of _extreme_ discomfort as he gritted his teeth and swore revenge in his mind.

"I hope things aren't too…_cool_ for you. Then again, you _are_ Superboy, right?" teased Artemis, finally enjoying herself.

"Shut. Up." Connor managed to say between gritted teeth.

_It. Burns._

Suddenly, Robin exited the closet, pink tutu and all.

Wally burst out laughing, and Kaldur and Red Arrow followed suit. Even Artemis couldn't hold back a few snickers. Only Zatanna didn't laugh, and she was covering her hand with her mouth, trying to hide her smile.

"It's not _that_ bad Robin." said Zatanna, trying to comfort him, although failing miserably.

The Boy Wonder hadn't been at such a low point since…well, since never. Having to wear a tutu…a pink one no less…this was murder. If Batman ever found out, or god forbid, Batgirl, he would never be able to live it down. Luckily, Wally knew better than to take pictures. He was mischievous, not suicidal.

Robin, fists clenched, eyes narrowed, and teeth gritted, walked quickly and took his seat next to Zatanna.

"What? You're not going to show us some of your moves? You are the Boy Wonder." snickered Wally.

"You're a dead man Wally." replied Robin. The way he said it brought chills up Wally's back, but the speedster didn't let that shown on his face. He instead busied himself by discreetly inhaling some more of Artemis's scent. Which was way too nice to be natural. She must have been meddling with alien technology.

_Or maybe she found some of Poison Ivy's gas?_

Suddenly, M'gaan morphed back into her normal human-like form, now lying next to both Wolf and Connor. Three rounds had come and gone, and they had little effect on her perkiness.

"My turn! My turn!" she exclaimed.

"Ah, no way. My turn." replied Red Arrow.

"Hey! It should be my turn!" exclaimed Robin, still seeing red every time he glanced at Wally, who was enjoying himself _way_ too much with Artemis on his lap, although he would no doubt vehemently deny such a thing.

"No, it should be my tu-"

"Enough!" exclaimed Kaldur, growing weary of the sudden fighting.

"We shall take turns by using a bottle." continued Kaldur, procuring an empty glass bottle from, well, from…somewhere.

"Here. We spin it. Whomever the opening lands on is the victim. The person the end faces gets to ask truth or dare." said Kaldur as he placed the bottle in the middle of the "circle-ish" formation that the group was sitting in.

"Hey, what about us? We're condemned to be together for the rest of this game. What if the bottle's end or opening lands on us?" asked Artemis.

"Then you get to either both agree on a truth or dare, or you both get to be forced to answer the same truth or perform the same dare." replied Kaldur, after a few moments of thinking.

"That's not fair now is it?" protested Wally.

"Since when does fair matter in this game?" snorted Red Arrow.

"Yeah. I say its good enough." agreed Robin, his appetite for revenge thoroughly insatiable.

"Very well then. It's agreed." said Zatanna.

"Ooh! I want to spin first!" exclaimed M'gaan as she reached for the bottle.

Grabbing it firmly, she spun it around. Hard.

As it twisted, Robin began mentally calculating its most likely destination. Connor was trying to ignore the numb feeling that was taking over his legs. Red Arrow narrowed his eyes. M'gaan widened her eyes in anticipation. And Wally subconsciously put his arms protectively around Artemis's waist. Or at least, that's what he told himself. And she didn't even protest.

The game had reached a whole new level. It was no longer a simple game of Truth or Dare. Then again, Truth or Dare was never simple.

The bottle stopped rolling.

Wally gulped. Artemis's lips formed a thin line.

The bottle was pointing at them. And its end was directly facing….Zatanna.

**MWAHWAHWAH! Yet another cliffhanger. Bring in the ideas people, and let's see if we can get another two chapters in tomorrow. So…how devious is Zatanna?...Why don't you tell me so I can tell you? :D**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5 is here! Sorry for not updating yesterday. But with your, yes, _your_ help, I'm going to try and make things a little more interesting...so you see that little button that says "review"? Click it. Or else.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one. The people who own this show screwed the fans.**

**July 10, 9:30 A.M, Mount Justice**

Robin smirked, not even bothering to hide his delight. Zatanna was a sensible girl. She would come up with something evil. Something horrible. Absolutely terrifying. Something to avenge the both of them.

Wally knew what his friend was thinking. Mainly because he was thinking the exact same thing.

_Please, PLEASE, oh god, mercy…._

He didn't know how devious Zatanna was, but she hung out with _Robin_ for god's sake…If he chose truth, he would be forced to bare his innermost secrets. If he chose dare…he would be forced to do something utterly humiliating.

Then again…humiliation can be overcome.

Artemis, on the other hand, was thinking much differently. She figured she could bluff her way through any "truth" asked of her, much like Roy did. A dare would be the end of her.

"Truth or Dare?" asked the magician, finally breaking what seemed to be hours of silence.

"Dare" replied Wally just as Artemis said "Truth."

Zatanna looked confused for a moment, and Artemis turned to glare at Wally.

Although, given the close proximity, it didn't really help him concentrate.

_Her grey eyes look really….mad_

And yes they were, given they were glaring at him, daring him to contradict her again.

"So, what's it going to be? Truth or dare?" asked Zatanna, knowing she could torture them with either, but secretly harboring her own plans.

"Can't we pick separate choices?" asked Wally, finally diverting his gaze from Artemis's face.

"No." replied Kaldur.

"But-"

"NO." came a chorus of response.

Apparently, the rest of the team wasn't in the mood to negotiate.

"Fine." muttered Wally.

"We pick truth." replied Artemis.

_We?_ she thought to herself.

"Truth it is." continued Zatanna.

Now it was Robin's time to smirk, yet _again_.

_That's my, err, Zatara's, girl!_

Wally gulped, fearing the horror that awaited. For the first time, he was beginning to regret mentioning the game.

"What is your favorite cookie?"

...

Artemis blinked. Wally looked confused. Robin was stunned.

Red Arrow and Kaldur broke out into wild guffaws.

M'gaan excitedly awaited the answer, despite the mundane question.

Only Connor remained expressionless. But that was mainly because he was regaining feeling in his legs. And it hurt.

"Well, what is it?" asked Zatanna impatiently.

"Uhm, ah, Chocolate chip." replied Wally. Artemis nodded in agreement.

Robin's brain began functioning again, but he couldn't figure out what had gone wrong.

_Favorite cookie? COOKIE?_

He was angry, but couldn't bring himself to glare at Zatanna. So he put on his best imitation of the bat glare and directed it towards Wally and Artemis. But in a pink tutu….it had little effect.

Zatanna smiled towards him in apology, and mouthed the words "I'll make it up to you." And she had every intention to do so, to her benefit as well of course.

That was almost enough for Robin to smile. _Almost._

_Robin looks cute when he's mad._

"Time to spin again." stated Kaldur, as M'gaan reached forward to spin the bottle once again. With twice as much force has before.

It spun. And spun. And spun. And then finally came to a slow stop.

The victim was Connor, and Red Arrow was his host.

"So, Truth or Dare, supey?" asked Roy, his interest in the game restored.

"Dare." replied Connor, blunt as ever.

"I dare you to jump up and say, in a high pitched girly voice, 'I am a pink pony from mars', while smiling goofily and giggling like a girl."

M'gaan's eyes opened wide as she saw the image in her mind, and she couldn't help but suppress a giggle.

Connor, expressionless as ever, followed through with the dare, jumping up, his pants now soaked from the melting ice, which promptly fell to his ankles.

_Hah. I guess M'gaan was right when she said there's a silver lining to everything._

Connor wobbled a little form the sudden movement, before regaining his composure, and saying, in a creepily realist bubbly voice, "I am a pretty pink pony from mars."

Connor even batted a few eyelashes for extra measure and giggled a little before lying back on his spot against Wolf, his expressionless face returning.

It was supposed to be humiliating, but Connor showed no signs of humiliation. And he had managed to thoroughly disturb each and _every_ person in the room.

"Ahem, well, ah, that was-"

"Weird." finished Artemis, interrupting a very, very uncomfortable Kaldur.

A few more silent moments passed.

"Well then, Spineroo." said Red Arrow as he spun the bottle, but with not nearly as much enthusiasm as M'gaan, who somehow managed to _still_ enjoy this absurd game.

So the bottle spun again, and all eyes returned to is, and nobody noticed the slight mystic glow in Zatanna's eyes as she watched it spin round, or the subtle movements of her lips. Except for Robin of course.

"Well, well, well." smirked Robin, "Looks like it's my lucky day."

The end of the bottle faced him, and the opening was pointed directly at Wally and Artemis, _again._

Artemis cringed inside, and Wally groaned loudly.

"Truth or dare?" asked Robin.

"Truth." answered Wally lamely, hoping to avoid a dare.

"Don't be chicken Baywatch. If I suffer, so do you. We're doing a dare." said Artemis, dashing his hopes within seconds.

"Whatever. Let's get this over with. Dare it is." muttered Wally.

_Why does this dreaded game hate me?_

"I dare you to…you know what, I need some time think about this."

"Time? _Time?"_ exasperated Wally.

"Yeah. But thankfully, it's been three turns. So, let met change out of this tutu-" on any other day robin would have choked on that last sentence "-and when I come back, I can smite you." replied Robin, quickly moving off the couch and nearly flying into the closet.

He would've flown if he could have.

Wally would have groaned, but Artemis covered his mouth before he could.

"Not. Another. Word."

But when she removed her hand from his mouth, he asked, with a raised eyebrow "Why? Are you going to make me shut up?"

He was about get a verbal beating when Robin exited from the closet, having somehow shredded the tutu, quite literally _shredded_, and put on his old clothes, in less than a minute. All without messing a single hair on his head.

The Boy Wonder quickly plopped back into his fluffy seat, a few more inches closer to Zatanna than before.

"Now, where were we?"

* * *

**Cliffhanger. 'Nuff said. Read, review, and leave ideas. Or I'll kidnap M'gaan and tell Connor she's at your address...And don't ask me how I'll find you. I've got Robin.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello people. I hope you caused lot's of chaos this April's Fools. Reading the reviews, I have a big suspicion that the person requesting flash in that revealing outfit is the same person...Anyway, here is Chapter 6! Read it in all of its glory.**

**July 10, 9:40 A.M, Mount Justice**

"I dare the two of you...to get married."

...

The room fell into silence for nearly a whole minute, before M'gaan spoke up.

"Yay! A wedding! I've never been to one before."

"Um, I'm nor sure they can get married...I mean, they _are_ underage." stated Roy.

"So? What does that have to do with anything?" asked Connor, expressionless as always.

Roy just shook his head.

"They could elope." offered Zatanna, holding back a fit of giggles.

"Can I organize everything?" asked M'gaan.

"There better be good food." replied Kaldur, knowing better that to try and bring sense to the table.

"Hey, I'm NOT paying for anything!" lashed Roy, remembering the last time they had a party, and the expensive drain it had on his wallet.

He gave a particularly long glare to Wally, who had eaten more than a whale could have possible consumed. Or a thousand whales.

But Wally was too busy trying to melt Robin with his glare. Literally. He was trying to test out a new theory of his involving the molecular vibrations of his eyes, but so far all he was able to do was squint _really_ hard.

Fortunately, Artemis was back on her feet. Quite literally.

"I am _not_ getting _married_ to Baywatch, of all people." she practically screamed.

"But that will ruin my wedding plans!" pouted M'gaan.

"There are no wedding plans, because there _won't_ be a wedding. Birdbrains here knows it won't be possible for me and Wally to get married." countered Artemis, sounding slightly calmer than before.

"Actually,I learned during my time in the pods that in some countries-" began Connor

"No. NO. Do. Not. Speak." interrupted Artemis through gritted teeth.

"Hey it think I get some say in my own wedding." said Wally, finally speaking.

For a speedster with a penchant for fast talking, he had found himself at a loss for words far too many times.

"You get no say. Because there is no wedding."

"He-"

"SHUT IT!" yelled Artemis.

"Wow. Extreme reaction, Artemis." said Roy.

"If I could just finish my da-" began Robin, in between chewfuls of popcorn from a bowl of the salty buttered goodness that had somehow appeared between him and Zatanna.

"But the wedding!" intervened M'gaan, oblivious to the chaos that was engulfing the room.

"I say we should do it on the beach outside." offered Connor, earning a smile from M'gaan.

"Ditto." replied Roy.

"Let me just finish!" exclaimed Robin, finally silencing everyone, and also earning two very nasty glares.

"You two aren't _really_ going to get married. You're just going to have to reenact a marriage. Zatanna here will provide the necessary spells to give the beach, or this room, the proper wedding materials and makeover. M'gaan will decide all of the details, but _I _get to appoint the roles." finished Robin, before chewing another handful of popcorn.

"That seems doable." agreed Kaldur, once again knowing better than to interrupt this game.

_Mental Note to Self: Video next game of Truth or Dare and take it to King Orin to convince him to banish it from Atlantis. Forever._

"Wait a minute! We can't get married" yelled Wally.

"Waaallllyyy, it's not a real marriage!" groaned M'gaan, already working out the details of the 'wedding' in her head.

"Ah, ah, ah. We can't do this dare without breaking a previous dare. _Remember?_ Artemis has to remain on my lap the whole time." answered Wally smugly, as if he had just cured world hunger.

Artemis smacked the side of his head.

"Doofus, we already broke that dare."

Roy broke out in open laughter, as Wally was further embarrassed.

"You know, since you broke the dare, doesn't that mean I get another dare?" asked Connor.

"Arrrggh! Wally, do not open your mouth, again!" gritted Artemis.

Before Connor could return the subject to his dare, Kaldur interrupted.

"There will be no extra dares. They are getting married, after all."

"Right. Now, M'gaan, Zatanna, you two work on the wedding, while the rest of us continue the game." said Robin.

Artemis and Wally sat back down, next to each other, as Robin spun the bottle.

In the background, M'gaan and Zatanna could be heard.

"Ooh, the cake should be strawberry! No, no! Vanilla. And there should be flying doves, or maybe swans?" jabbered M'gaan, with Zatanna procuring whatever she demanded.

"Bottle landed on me." stated Connor towards Roy, his 'host'.

"Truth or dare?" asked the ginger archer.

"Da-" began Connor, before remembering the ice.

"Truth." he corrected.

"Ah..."

Come to think of it...Connor didn't really have any secrets.

"Well?" asked Connor, growing impatient.

"Ah, well..have you and M'gaan done it?" asked Roy.

"It? What do you mean it?" asked Connor, clearly not understanding the situation.

"You know..._it._" emphasized Roy, as Wally and Robin began giggling at the absurdity of the situation.

"You make no sense. What is this _it_ you speak of?" asked Connor, now clearly annoyed, and frowning.

Kaldur wisely chose not to say anything as the ginger archer next to him struggled to say words.

"I mean, ah, you don't...oh forget it." exasperated Roy, giving up.

"Well...that was easy." replied Connor.

_Maybe I should do truths more often_

Suddenly, Zatanna and M'gaan appeared, grabbing at Artemis as they ran off.

"Sorry, got to go try on dresses for the bride!" they both said, simultaneously, dragging Artemis with them.

"You lucky dog, you. Getting hitched already." sniggered Robin as Wally shot him a glare.

Roy and Kaldur couldn't help but snigger along, and even Connor smirked. Barely. But it was still a smirk.

"Alright, round we go." said Roy as he spun the bottle, Robin and Wally moving closer to tighten their 'circle'.

"Finally, payback time." smirked Wally, as he found himself a very, _very_ willing 'host' of Robin

"Sooo, bird-boy, what's it going to be? Truth or Dare?" asked Wally, looking directly at Robin, who refused to show even a sliver of fear.

"Good luck trying to avenger yourself. I choose..."

* * *

**Huh**. **Accidental cliffhanger...or is it? Read and review, or I will make you marry your archenemy of a different gender. And I can do it. Don't test me. Now, review and leave some ideas and thoughts! And I hope you all got pranked this April Fool's. I know I did...not. :P**


	7. Chapter 7

**I'm back. Sorry for the delays, life and everything seems to be catching up to me. Anyway, this isn't really a full chapter...just a teaser at what will either be the end of the story, or a major twist in the plot or something. Read. Review. Or Batman will hunt you down. And sorry for the smaller chapter size. I hope I make up for it in hilarity.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Young Justice or any of it's characters.**

**July 10, Mount Justice**

The sun stood high in the sky, shining down radiant beams of light on Mount Justice. From a passing helicopter or plane, it was a beautiful sight. A majestic mountain, a beautiful sun, and a beach to boot.

If only the inhabitants weren't otherwise..._occupied_ to take advantage of the beauty of their habitat.

* * *

The beach was a warzone. A place no human should have had the displeasure of seeing. A barren wasteland of cruelty and misery.

"I HATE MONKEYS!" screamed Connor, throwing a screeching monkey off his back and into the air.

Another jumped on him, to meet the same fate. Then another, and another. They seemed to anger him even more with their persistence and number.

"GET OFF ME!" roared the angry half-kryptonian, ready to strangle each and everyone monkey like thing he saw for the rest of his life.

* * *

"Fire!" exclaimed Robin as he jumped to his feet at the sight of growing flames engulfing the table .

The Boy Wonder was inexplicably wearing a tuxedo, with of course, his signature sunglasses. Equally puzzling were the multiple lipstick stains on his check. And tux collar. But that wasn't important. What was important was the fire, but Kaldur was handling that.

"I have this under control!" the leader stated, extinguishing the fire with water. But what was more interesting was the fact that Kaldur, _the_ Kaldur, leader of the Young Justice team and close confidante and assistant to the King of Atlantis, was dressed like...a preacher?

What the...?

* * *

"Quack. Quack. Qua-Hey, what are you looking at? You never seen a green duck before?"

At this, the startled 10 year old boy froze in shock for exactly 5 seconds, before screaming at the top of his lungs and running as far away as possible.

What he left behind was a green duck. Who just so happened to be able to talk.

"Great, now I'm going to miss the wedding unless I hurry." muttered said duck, as she Quacked her not so merry way through the town, causing the occasional faint here and the more than occasional shrieks of horror.

* * *

Now, Artemis took pride in being level headed. Sure, she was feisty and sarcastic, and often got angry, but she prided herself on keeping her head on straight and managing to think through tough situations.

But a girl can only take so much.

She was currently lying flat on her back. Next to Wally. On her _freakin' wedding cake._

At least she wasn't face down like Kid Idiot next to her.

Then again, at this point, things couldn't get much worse than they already were.

"ARRGGGHHH!" she screamed.

* * *

When Red Arrow woke up, he was in a tuxedo. In a bathtub. Full of...chocolate pudding?

Red Arrow groaned, rubbing a lump on his head.

_How did that get there?_

He could vaguely remember being dared before looking up, and seeing a chandelier.

_What?_

Red Arrow looked around quickly, and realize he was in a tuxedo in a bathtub full of chocolate pudding in the living room, and that monkeys were swinging from the chandelier.

_What?_

* * *

"I think it's time we made our leave." whispered Zatanna into Robin's ear, quickly grabbing the Boy Wonder's arm and dragging him behind some nearby rocks, while the rest of their teammates were distracted.

"Ah, Zatanna, not that I mind, but, what exactly is going on?" asked Robin, ignoring the beautiful bridesmaids dress she was wearing

_Aren't those thins supposed to make bridesmaids ugly or something?_

"We're being smart." came the cryptic reply.

"Wha-"

Robin never got to finish his reply.

"_What on god's green earth is going on here!"_

Zatanna already knew who it was, and Robin recognized the voice, as did everyone else who was there, including a green quacking duck that had just arrived out of the blue.

"Snap." whispered Robin.

Green Arrow was here.

***Back to Present Time***

"Sooo, bird-boy, what's it going to be? Truth or Dare?"

* * *

**Heheheh. This came to me as I pondered what to do next, and I just couldn't resist. Instead of posting a chapter, I posted fragments of what happens later...Hah. Think of this as some sick and twisted four day late April Fool's joke. Anyway, I shall try to update soon. Until then, read and review! **


	8. Chapter 8

**Yeah...you know how I said I would update early? Well, life smacked that into the gutter. So, let the funfest begin once again.**

**Disclaimer: Why do I even need this? I mean, it's kind of obvious I don't own this tv series. Sigh. Dang lawsuits thee days. Ruining all my chances of filing my own lawsuit.**

**July 10, 9:50 A.M, Mount Justice**

"I pick dare." replied Robin, his face remaining as cool as a cucumber.

In the distant background, a shriek of anger could be heard as Zatanna and M'gaan tried to subdue a _very_ angry archer.

* * *

"I am _NOT_ trying these dresses on!" yelled Artemis, gesturing wildly to a series of white bride's dresses.

"Yes, you _ARE_!" replied Zatanna, not afraid to go toe to toe with the archer.

"No, I'm _NOT_!"

"Don't fight, it will ruin the wedding!" pouted M'gaan.

* * *

Back to the Living Room...

"Well, Robin, I dare you to...prank call Superman, using the Babs method of Luxembourg. Using the _exact_ same dialogue she used."

Robin gritted his teeth.

"You want me. To talk. Like a hooker."

At this, Conner's eyebrow raised, while Red Arrow broke into a wild guffaw.

"You'll be doing it on the phone, so no worries. Babs had to do it. In person."

Only Kaldur had the decency to look awkward as Robin fumbled out one of his _many_ 'covert ops' (AKA general mischief) cell phone and began dialing Clark Kent's home number.

Wally didn't even bother to ask how he knew it.

* * *

Artemis was not angry.

Oh no. Not angry at all.

She was downright _homicidal._

"Ooh! You look so pretty!" exclaimed M'gaan, standing besides Artemis and Zatanna.

"I agree." replied Zatanna, stifling a of laughter.

"I look like a bloated fairy out of a rom-com that was a box office bomb." came the reply.

Well...she _kind_ of did, given her current dress was so frilly and so blindingly white, it almost hurt to look at it.

"Ok! Come on, let's go try on another one!" chirped M'gaan, prompting a large groan from Artemis.

_I. Will. KILL. Wally._

* * *

"Hello, _handsome._" drawled Robin in an attempt to sound sultry.

Two words, and Red Arrow and Wally were struggling to keep in the laughter.

Kaldur's face grew red as he tried to hide a smile.

Connor's actually turned his head to see Robin's face. A feat in it's own.

_"Who is this?"_ came a reply from the person on the other end. A person who sounded a lot like Superman.

"Why, honey, don't you remember me?" continued Robin, thanking god that he had encrypted all of phones so much there was _no way_ this phone could be tracked to him. No no. At best, it would be tracked to the Indian countryside.

_"Umm, you must be mistaken."_

"Oh no no. I just _couldn't_ forget you, Mr. Kent. We had _such_ a blast last weekend." said Robin, desperately wishing Superman would just hang up.

But of course, he didn't.

_"What are you talking about?"_ asked Superman, starting to get irritated.

"I'm just _hurt_ you forgot me. Especially after the _wild night_ we had."

Wally was on the floor now, practically choking in silent laughter.

_"What exactly are you insinuating?"_

"Why honeypie, I think you know _exactly_ what I'm insinuating. You dog."

Robin wished he was dead. Quite literally.

Ok, maybe not. But a coma was starting to look pretty good right now.

_"I'm going to have to ask you not to call this number again."_

"So that's how it's going be? You use me for one night and toss me aside? I know you paid...but I felt something _special_ with you!" continued Robin, now holding on to every inch of his self control to not strangle Wally.

_"I have no idea-Lois! I have no idea who sh-Lois, NO!"_

A brief commotion could be heard in the background.

_"HELLO! Who is this?!" _

Uh oh.

"Ahh, what's that? Customer's arrived. Gotta go. Tell that hunk of a man I said bye."

And with that, Robin hung up the phone, leaving Superman with a very, _very_ pissed Lois Lane.

* * *

"So tell me, do _I_ get any say in my own wedding?" asked Artemis, having just put on a new dress.

"No." came the unanimous reply.

Artemis merely sighed.

* * *

"Ju-ju-gi-give-m-me, a m-minute." said Wally in between laughter.

Besides him Red Arrow was laughing so hard, he was almost choking.

Even Connor was smiling. An actual _smile._

The sky must have been falling or something.

Kaldur finally cleared his throat.

"Ahem. I think, that maybe, we should ah, continue?"

Sometimes it was hard being the most mature person in the room.

"Sure." muttered Robin, spinning the bottle with such force it could have spun of and hit Wally's head.

Not that Robin would mind.

* * *

"This one! Please, _this one!_" begged Artemis, willing to get down on her knees if it meant the end to this living nightmare.

M'gaan furrowed her brow as if she was in deep thought. Which she probably was.

Zatanna was off casting some spells to put the finishing touches on the wedding area, which was apparently going to be the beach.

"Fine." relented the Martian.

"Thank you, thank you, _thank you!_" exclaimed Artemis, sounding almost as desperate as she was.

* * *

"Truth or Dare Roy?" asked Kaldur, having been chosen by the 'all powerful bottle' as Red Arrow's host.

"Dare it is." replied Roy, having just recovering from his earlier laughing fit.

"Ok, a dare you shall get." replied the Atlantian, taking a few moments to think.

"I have it! I dare you to spend the rest of the time from now until our friend's 'wedding' in a bathtub full of chocolate pudding while in your wedding tux."

The dare was so bizarre that it forced Connor to show expression _again._

The world just _had_ to be ending.

"Uh, ok?"

"Connor, please bring that old bathtub from the storage closet in the hall. Wally, go fetch the several gallons of pudding you have been hoarding for the last week." ordered Kaldur.

"Bu-but-" protested the ginger-haired speedster.

"_Now."_

Wally groaned as he zipped for the kitchen, where he began gathering his absurdly large pile of chocolate pudding. Which he had been hoarding just to piss of Artemis because she had this really adorable look on her face when she got mad about her pudding and-

_Snap out of it!_

Right, focus. Pudding.

* * *

"You have to be kidding me." gasped Artemis in shock.

"Isn't it just perfect?" squealed Megan

"It's absurd! It's overkill!" exclaimed Artemis, regaining her breath.

"It's perfect. Just perfect?" teased Zatanna

"God. You are all insane." muttered Artemis.

In front of her was a 32 layer vanilla cake. _32 layers._

* * *

It wasn't really their fault. Roy kind of slipped. I mean, he _really_ shouldn't have been a chicken. It was kind of his fault he had put his pudding covered, dress shoe back on the hard floor. And slipped. And hit his head against the tub. I mean, sure, Connor may have bumped into Wally who bumped into Robin who bumped into Roy, but still...

"I say we leave him here." spoke up Robin.

"Wait. I have a better idea." said Connor, picking up the tux laden Roy and tossing him into the pudding filled bathtub the group had managed to place in the living room.

"Connor!" exclaimed Kaldur.

"What? With his height, the amount of pudding in here, and the size of the bathtub, there is no way he can drown or anything." replied Connor nonchalantly.

Kaldur only sighed in disbelief.

"Hey, the bottle has spun!" pointed Wally.

Indeed it had. On one end was Robin. On the other...was no one.

"Aw man." the Boy Wonder said.

At that moment, M'gaan appeared out of nowhere..._directly in front of the bottle._

"The wedding is ready!" she exclaimed

"Great! I can choose roles! But first...M'gaan, truth or dare?" asked Robin.

"Ooh! Dare!" exclaimed M'gaan.

"Great. Why don't you take a walk around town. As a green duck. In the meantime, the rest of us will prepare for the wedding."

M'gaan frowned, before shape shifting into a green goose and "quacking" her way out.

As she walked out, Zatanna walked in, not the least bit disturbed by a green duck quacking out of the room.

"Where's Artemis?" asked Wally.

"Ah ah ah. Bad luck to see the bride before the wedding." grinned Zatanna, earning her a glare from the speedster.

"Now, about those roles..." began the Boy Wonder, as a smile crept up on his face.

"Wait! First, we spin the bottle!" said

* * *

**Wow. This has to be the biggest chapter so far. By only a little though. Anyway, I fear we may be nearing the end. I promise at least 10 chapters, but I don't promise more...So read and review! Leave any ideas you have in you review, including whether Lois Lane, Batman, and/or Superman should show up with Green Arrow later on. Thanks for reading!**


	9. Chapter 9

**I'm BACK. Thanks to all the dedicated reviewers and viewers. I'm having a lot of fun writing this story, much more fun than I'd expected to have. Again, thanks to all of you! Yes YOU!**

**Wally: Are you done yet?**

**Robin: Dibs on the disclaimer.**

**Wally: Nah uh Boy Blunder!**

**Robin: Yeah huh Kid Idiot!**

**Kaldur: Frozencake owns nothing and no one. Now silence you two.**

**Wally and Robin: NAH UH!**

**July 10, 10:10 A.M, Mount Justice**

"Wait! First we spin the bottle!" said Wally, grabbing the bottle and spinning it haphazardly.

If they had all been thinking seriously, they would have realized it was futile to spin the bottle.

Then again, two of them were getting married, one had just pretend to be a hooker on a prank call to Superman, one was unconscious in a tub full of chocolate pudding, another was a green goose, and the only two seemingly sane one had given up all hope at restoring order.

And the bottle landed.

* * *

"Quack quack. Ooh, that's such a nice dress!"

The little girl simply made baby googling noises upon noticing the _talking green goose_.

Her mother's necked whipped around to the sight so fast, her neck almost snapped.

"Hi!" exclaimed M'gaan, still in her goose form, but excited to see such a young baby outside with her mom on such a beautiful day.

And the child shared her oogling wonder.

Unfortunately the mother didn't, and fainted upon hearing a green goose talk to her not once, but _twice._

She fainted right there and then, falling onto the soft grass in a low moan.

"Uh, Miss? Are you ok?" asked M'gaan, with no answer, slightly worried but still in her duck form.

"Ga ga goo!"

* * *

"So, Connor, truth or dare?" asked Zatanna.

"Dare." replied Connor.

"I dare you to allow 23 monkeys to hang on you limb from limb doing whatever, _after_, you put on a tuxedo like the rest of us, and until we call you for the wedding. You will also have to do this while standing perfectly still outside in the beach, within view of the wedding proceeding."

"Ouch. That's cruel Zee." snickered Robin, containing his laughter.

Connor's face turned angry for a few seconds, before returning to normal.

"Where exactly will 23 monkeys and a whole series of tuxedo's arrive from?" he asked.

"Magic." relpied Robin and Zatanna, simultaneously.

"Right." muttered Connor as Zatanna uttered a spell that somehow put a tuxedo on every man in the room, and a bridesmaid dress on herself.

"Now, to the wedding area! Robin, now would be a good time to appoint roles." said Zatanna she led the group, sans an unconscious ginger-haired archer, outside onto the sunny beach.

* * *

M'gaan had moved on from the mother, deciding, rather wisely, to leave the woman alone to avoid any other problems.

Her next vict-_encounter_ was an old woman drinking tea while reading the newspaper.

"Pass the sugar darling."

"Sure thing." replied M'gaan, using a brief flapping of her wings to get on the table and nudge the sugar closer to the old lady before returning to the ground.

"Thanks darling."

"You're welcome! Us ducks have to help the community!"

The old woman chuckled as M'gaan walked away, quacking.

"Children these days with their imaginations."

The old woman was lucky she was too ingrained in reading about the next city town hall meeting to notice the green duck feather in her teacup.

For now.

"Just to remind everyone...Zatanna, you're the flower girl. Kaldur, you're the preacher, and here's a some paper with instructions on what to say. Connor will be the ring bearer. Once he survives the monkeys."

"Rings?" asked Artemis.

"Oh, right. Here they are." said Robin, producing two highly realistic looking rings from his pockets.

The rings were fake, but as he watched everyone's eyes grow large, the thought of mentioning that never crossed Robin's mind.

"Now, everyone, in to position!" he said, as if this were a missions.

* * *

Meanwhile, Connor was roughly 75 yards away from the group. And mad.

_ I wonder if killing a monkey is against the law?_

The boy of steel was currently using every ounce of his willpower not to lash out at the monkeys encroaching his body.

At least some were back in the Living room, doing god knows what instead of hanging on Connor.

_Think happy thoughts. Happy thoughts. Happy-ARGH! How does M'gaan do this!_

"You ready for this harpy?" asked Wally, grinning from ear to ear.

"Quit smiling Baywatch, or your face will break in half...then again, that would be an improvement." retorted Artemis.

"Hey!"

"Hah, that's the best respone you have?"

"Can it she witch!"

"Make me!"

"Make me make you!"

At this point Artemis grabbed wally and shoved him to the ground in a snarl.

"Hah!"

In the blink of an eye, Wally got up and shoved her right back, sending her flying onto her butt while her back hit the table of food Zatanna and M'gaan had prepared.

This did two things. The first was to cause the candle on the table to fall over, which in turn lit up the tablecloth as Artemis got up ready for a fight, moving to shove the speedster. He zipped aside and tripped her, but she grabbed onto his tux, pulling him down with her as she tumbled straight into the obscenely large thirty two layer cake that was precariously placed on the table across to the one currently on fire.

* * *

"ARGH!" let out Superboy, as he finally lost his will.

One of the monkeys had gotten...handsy down south, which was more than enough for Connor.

No monkey _groped_ Superboy and got away with it.

And while they were at it, the monkey's cousin monkey's could use a little teaching as well.

* * *

"Oh, look at the time! I must get back to the wedding!" exclaimed M'gaan in front of a store that, oddly enough, seemed to only sell clocks.

The old man passing by mere looked down at the odd sight for no more than three seconds, before continuing.

"Talking Green Duck? Seen it before."

* * *

"ENOUGH!" roared Kaldur, finally having grown weary.

Artemis and Wally he could handle.

Robin's antics he could handle.

Connor and M'gaan's slight out of touch with reality personalities he could handle.

But this...this was..._indescribable._

Artemis groaned from her spot on the cake as Wally started to move again.

"This is all your fault you sissy! Can't handle getting shoved by a girl."

"You're no girl." replied Wally in-between..._mouthfuls._

"Wallace West, I swear to god if you are eating this cake!"

And so launched another tirade. At this point Kaldur resigned himself to his fate once more, and simply sat down on the sandy beach and closed his eyes, oblivious to the bickering 'couple' currently in the rubble of a once grand cake, or to the raging half-kryptonian in the background screaming every world he could think of to convey his extreme hate for the monkeys, or Robin and Zatanna who were...wait..where were Robin and Zatanna?

**Living Room**

Roy Harper. The Red Arrow. Was currently watching Robin and Zatanna. Making out. While eating ice cream. Or at least, if sloppy kisses on the cheek and neck in between heaping scoops of ice cream count as 'making out'.

The two had quickly disappeared after the cake crashed. Robin could care less about the wedding, as he predicted it would go up in flames...just not _literally._

Roy would have been trolling them to no extent, but he was in a bathtub full of pudding for god's sake. Plus, Robin needed practice anyway.

* * *

"I'm telling you Batman, I need your help!" exclaimed Superman.

"Superman, this is your problem, not mine." replied the Dark Knight.

"Lois is still angry at me, and I _need_ to know who did this to me! I'd never ask, but these are desperate times!" continued Superman, actually every bit as desperate as he sounded. Lois Lane was far more than angry. She was enraged. Which was never a good thing.

"She'll come around. Lois knows you wouldn't cheat."

"Yes, but I want her to come around _now. _And I need to find the culprit. You are the greatest detective in the world, are you not?" asked Superman.

"I still think this whole thing is a really funny prank." interrupted Green Arrow, who had been with the two the whole time.

Superman glared in response.

"Fine, Kent. I'll do you a favor, just this once." relented the Dark Knight, a small part of himself feeling sorry for the guy. He had been on the receiving on of Lois Lane's wrath once, but that was a long time ago, and was _nothing_ like it sounded.

"Thanks! I'll owe you one!"

"No, you'll owe me two. Now, I'm going to have to access your phone records, and hack your phone for the call recording. We'll use a voice system to cross reference all known databases to find the culprit."

"Oh boy. I'm going to stick around for this. I _gotta_ hear this recording." teased Green Arrow.

A few seconds later, it began. And so did the laughter.

**And there we are. Chapter 9 in all it's glory. _This_ is the longest chapter, but it only by a few words. Anyway, REVIEW! Or I'll do something evil like put a review quota for each chapter. Heheheh. Feedback is always welcomed.**

**Also, thanks for the typo alert prettykitty!**


	10. Chapter 10

**We are live. WOAH. Nearly 70 reviews, and over 50 followers. AWESOME!**

**A special shout out to prettykitty luvs u, Zatanna Carrile, Veritas1995, and PurplePeace for all their support!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Young Justice. I do own 20 acres of the moon. **

**July 10, 10:30 A.M, Mount Justice**

_"Ahem."_

Robin and Zatanna nearly jumped at the voice, especially Robin, who nearly sprained his neck as he whipped around to identify the source.

_Roy? He's awake..._

_I am not feeling the aster right now._

"Well, as entertaining as the little show you guys have put is, I kind of want to get out of this tub, and seeing as how I seem unable to move my body from out of this gooey mass of what appears to be pudding, I kind of need some help." continued Roy, smirking at the blushes creeping up on both Zatanna and Robin's faces.

_I wish I had a camera._

...

Zatanna was the first to reply, her blush now turning into a sly smile.

"Well maybe we don't want to help you."

"That would be a very, _very_ bad choice to make." replied Roy

"Oh really? Why is that?" asked Robin, taking a bite of ice cream as he said this.

"We both know I have dirt on you birdy." threatened Roy, his eyes turning to slits.

Robin shrugged nonchalantly.

"I have more dirt."

"Grr...Well, I'm sure _Babs_ would just looove to hear all about this little love fest. And I'll make sure she finds out if you don't get me out of here."

Robin nearly choked on his ice cream.

_Man, I am losing my touch._

"Who is Babs? Wally mentioned her earlier." asked Zatanna, seeing the name's effect on Robin.

"She's-"cough "no-" cough "one." sputtered Robin.

_She?_

A frown appeared on her face, much to Robin's disdain and Roy's delight.

"You. Will. Say. Nothing." said the Boy Wonder, while giving Roy a batglare.

But the archer, having babysat the Boy Wonder, and KF, and having received more batlglares in his lifetime than he could count, was immune to such eye attacks.

"I won't if you get me out of here."

"I think I'll leave you there. And if Babs somehow finds out about this, she'll tease me to death about it. Which means I'll tell Green Arrow what it was you were _really_ doing at his Maui beach house when he took Canary on the cruise. And he might beat you to death."

"You man what we-"

This time, Roy stopped, and then closed his mouth.

It needn't be said that he had done a lot of, _questionable_ things during that weekend. Not to mention the actions of Wally West and a one Dick Grayson.

Roy was pretty sure the little girl next door, who was unfortunate enough to have witnessed some of the things they had done, had never quite recovered.

_But that's what I get for inviting the little troll and that speed demon. Although that girl's older sister was kind of hot-never mind!_

Robin smirked, recognizing victory when he saw it.

"Come on Zee, let's go to the wedding. Hopefully by now, the rest of the crazy bunch will have calmed down." continued the Boy Wander, grabbing his girlfriend(?) and storming out to the beach.

Roy groaned.

_Wait...is this stuff hardening?!_

He groaned even louder.

* * *

"This can't be right." murmured Batman.

"What can't be right?" asked Superman, hasty to find the woman who had turned Lois against him and give "her" a piece of his mind.

Green Arrow was still pink in the face, barely suppressing what would be his third or maybe ninth fit laughter, or rather, a fit of giggles that would quickly grow into roaring laughter before dying down as the archer started grasping for air.

Somewhere along the lines Black Canary had arrived, and had somehow extorted both the Man of Steel and the Dark Knight for an explanation and her own chance to listen to the recording.

Now, she too joined her partner in suppressing her laughter, although she was doing a much better job of it.

"The database says we have a voice match from the League Database. Which means either a hero or villain has been playing with you." replied the Dark Knight, ignoring the giggling couple behind him.

The truth was, the Dark Knight was barely suppressing his own smile.

Kent wasn't.

"Does that mean someone, possible, one of our sworn enemies, knows about me, and Lois? AND LOIS?" exclaimed Superman as horrible scenarios began to play into his minds.

"Doubtful. Just give me a few seconds and..." Batman quickly pressed a few buttons as a new page opened up.

"You have got to be kidding me..." gasped Black Canary in shock as Superman eyes turned to glare at Batman.

Batman's eyes turned into slits as he gave the onscreen image a _severe_ batglare.

Green Arrow simply lost control over his laughter again, prompting Canary to give him another playful slap, even as a smile spread over her face.

_Recognized Voice Match: Robin, Boy Wonder._

* * *

Meanwhile, on a beach far below, there stood an angry half-kryptonian, two very pissed off future life partners currently in "time-out" thanks to an Atlantean, a somewhat confused magician, some monkeys, and a not so wonderful feeling Boy Wonder.

Not to mention the Martian unknowingly terrorizing the local populace as a goose, or the red haired archer stuck in a tub of pudding that was hardening at an alarming rate.

In hindsight, after the Justice League truth or dare fiasco from a couple years back..someone should have thought to warn their pupils about the perils of such games.

**Sorry to leave you all with such a short chapter...but I hope I made up for it with some extra "screen" time for Roy, Zatanna, Robin, and those oh so very heroic heroes of the watchtower. Leave some ideas for anything you want in the next chapter. And due to popular demand, chocolate chip cookies will be making an appearance before this story ends! Now, I just need to think of how to formulate their dastardly return...:D**

**Feedback always appreciated, and I apologize for any grammar mistakes.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Sorry for the update delay. I had some trouble stringing this chapter together, but here it is, another slipshod chapter given to you by a shady, paranoid author. Also, somehow, this marriage dare has now become a main central point...We're not even doing truth or dare people...And I suck at kissing scenes. So I apologize in advance for whatever torture your eyes endure.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Young Justice. I own this plot. Some of the ideas may or may not belong to several reviewers...**

**July 10, 10:50 A.M, Mount Justice**

"I can't believe you're doing this Kaldur! It's all _his_ fault!"

"My fault?! Well, you little harpy, if you weren't too busy trying to shove me, or maybe _grope_ me, we wouldn't be treated like little kids!"

"Grope you? Please. Only in your sick, perverted dreams!"

"Why you-"

"ENOUGH" bellowed Conner, having finally scared off the accursed monkeys.

"Thank you Conner." replied Kaldur, somehow maintaining his calm composure, which he managed to recollect after a brief 'momentary lapse of character', as he put it.

"Now, if you two would simply listen, you would know the reason you are stuck in timeouts are because you have _both _been acting like children."

It was true. Artemis and Wally were sitting on opposite ends of the "wedding area", with their backs turned to one another, having been pried to their separate locations by the Atlantean.

"Bu-"

"I SAID ENOUGH!" bellowed Conner, once more.

Monkeys didn't agree with him

"Now, I am wearing a tuxedo, a _tuxedo_, and I am wasting a perfectly boring morning indulging you all in this little twisted, sadistic, little game. But I am here. And I am supposed to be watching a wedding. Now, M'gaan is coming any minute. And you two _are getting married. _Am I clear?"

Connor spoke each word with such raw, horrifying, monkey induced anger, that it unnerved even Kaldur. Especially since none of them had really heard him string so many words together without screaming or punching something.

Soon, it became so silent, that aside from the sound of the ocean waves crashing against the beach...and the giggling of Zatanna and Robin.

"I should have set up this sham marriage a loooong time ago."

* * *

"Mount Justice. Now." gritted Superman towards Batman.

"Agreed. We go there, and find the _perfectly logical explanation_ as to why Robin is behind this, assuming he is indeed behind this, and this isn't some elaborate scheme or mistake." replied the Dark Knight, never ceasing to look menacing as ever.

"There is no way I'm not coming." said Green Arrow, regaining his breath as he stoop up from the table with Black Canary.

"If he's coming, so am I."

* * *

"Anytime now. Really. This isn't funny guys!"

No response.

_Of course_

At this point, Roy was starting to lose feeling in his lower body, and he was barely able to lift his arms above the hardening pudding.

And then Zatanna walked in, a pretty big smirk on her face.

"Just coming back to check up on you while our friends get the wedding. Robin's rather enjoying himself, though. How you holding up, Red?"

He narrowed his eyes.

"We can make a deal, you know." he said, as she came closer to observe his 'predicament'.

"Oh really? And what exactly could you offer me? I'm sure whatever it is, Robin can cover with blackmail."

"Actually, this is something Robin wouldn't want to talk about. _Babs._"

At this, Zatanna's brow moved up, as she looked at Roy questionably.

"What about this Babs fellow?"

"Oh yeah. You'll want to hear all about it. She and Robin have a _very _long history."

_Payback rhymes with itch and starts with a b, boy wonder._

At that moment, the Zeta tubes announced the arrival of several prominent members of the league.

"Oh boy." muttered Roy as Zatanna quickly scampered out. No doubt to warn Robin.

_Revenge will be mine. I will-_

"Roy?"

_Uh oh._

Green Arrow stood dumbfounded, looking at his former protégé in a tux, half submerged in a tub of brown liquid like substances.

Black Canary was right next to him, and within seconds, so were Batman, sporting his signature glare, and Superman, with his own glare.

"Don't ask. Just get me out of this thing!" exclaimed Roy.

Right after, a monkey appeared from nowhere, jumping and swinging down from the ceiling onto the floor where it subsequently disappeared in a cloud of purple smoke a few feet in front of the senior heroes.

...

"Not a chance. Talk. Now." replied Batman.

Roy sighed, giving up. Even someone as stubborn as him could only endure so much. And he was pretty sure soaking in pudding for this long wasn't healthy.

"Well, you're not going to believe this...but it all started with Wally's stupid idea of a game. Oh, but more importantly, there's a wedding going on. And I plan on crashing it."

* * *

"I know pronounce you husband and wife. You may, ah, kiss the bride."

Wally and Artemis looked at each other for a few seconds.

"Come on! This is the last part! Get it over with, and I'll forgo the rest of the wedding. I'm feeling gracious." egged Robin, with, of course, a high-definition camcorder in his hands.

It was, of course, streaming live to his computer, where he would edit it, and place it somewhere at the top of his list of high-quality blackmail material.

To his right was Connor, gruff and annoyed beyond reason. At this point, he was hungry, and the wedding buffet was looking good.

Arriving to his left was M'gaan, half walking, half flapping her green wings, oblivious to the whirl storm of chaos she had inflicted upon the poor unsuspecting populace, or the hurricane of trouble about to engulf her and her friends.

"Ooh! I made it just in time!"

Get this over with so I can eat!"

The 'lucky' couple leaned in, both of their cheeks a bright crimson as their lips got closer until they were mashed together.

M'gaan squealed, now in her human form. Connor remained indifferent. Robin was filming every glorious detail in High Definition, and Zatanna, arriving from the cave in a rush, paused only for a few moments to soak in the moment, before grabbing Robin and fleeing to safety behind a few rocks.

The Boy Wonder was, of course, expertly filming Artemis and Wally as the two became oblivious to the world around them and began taking up their pent up rage on each other's lips.

* * *

"_What on god's green earth is going on here!"_

Artemis and Wally separated and practically jumped from one another, panting, crimson red, and embarrassed out of their cake covered clothes.

Green Arrow looked like he was ready to pop a vein, or impale someone, as the humor of the situation quickly drained from his brain and was replaced by homicidal rage.

_He was practically GROPING HER! Worse, it was LIP RAPE!_

Black Canary shook her head in disbelief at the scene before her. It was simply too absurd.

...

"Um, hi?" asked M'gaan uncertainly.

"Where's Robin?" asked Superman, menacingly, at the same time as Batman.

* * *

"So, how long do you think we have before we're found out?" asked Zatanna to her partner in mischief.

"Long enough for me to make sure this footage is properly stored away. Boy, do I have plans for this. I guess since the cat's out of the bag, I'm just going to have to do something like put the video on YouTube."

"Speaking of cats leaving bags...who is this Babs girl? I mean, Red Arrow says you guys have history and there's the whole-"

Before Zatanna could finish her sentence, which, unknowingly to her, had already sent up major alarms Robin's brain, the boy wonder was suddenly picked up, _upside down_, by a big hovering figure in blue and red.

"Hey, Supes. Something wrong?" asked Robin, looking at the Man of Steel upside down.

"We need to talk."

Gulp.

**Back in The Living Room**

"WILL SOMEBODY GET ME OUT OF HERE! I CAN'T FEEL MY LOWER BACK!"

**There you have it ladies, gentlemen, kids, adults, and everyone in between. Chapter 11. At this point I am purely making everything up as I go...Who am I kidding. That's what I was doing from the beginning. Anyway, feedback is always appreciated, and let me know what you want to see next.**


	12. Chapter 12

**So, SO sorry for the long update delay. I shall try to make sure this never happens again, and stick to my usual late update time of 2-3 days. For some reason I have been stuck with this insane idea of mixing some Marvel Characters into YJ, and it has been eating at me as my brain goes all over the place... And no, I haven't forgotten about the chocolate chip cookies...they're just not in this chapter. No...I'm not delaying...**

**Black Canary**

**Disclaimer: No. Just no. If you had to ask, you don't deserve to know the answer.**

**July 10, 11:10 A.M, Mount Justice**

"Put. Him. Down." growled Batman, a mere 5 yards aware from Superman.

Superman didn't even bother to look away from Robin, although he could _feel_ the Batglare drilling a hole into the back of his head.

"Not until I get an explanation."

"We'll take him back inside with everyone else. You can get your explanation there. Along with an explanation for this..._mess._" continued Batman, as he gestured towards the scene of Back Canary subduing Green Arrow while he shouted profusely at Wally, who in turn was in a heated argument with Artemis, while Kaldur and Superboy ate from the large wedding banquet and M'gaan looked on guiltily.

"Fine." grumbled Superman, slinging Robin over his shoulder and preparing to-_Batlgare_

"I said, put. Him. Down."

"Fine..."

* * *

"DID YOU SEE HIM!? Don't tell me to calm down Dinah! She's my protégé, practically my niece, family, and that red headed demon, he-"

"Was kissing her. Teenagers do that Oliver. Stop thinking like her uncle and start thinking like your rational self."

"And this, this, _wedding? _Is that supposed to be normal too?"

Canary sighed and rubbed her temples, a sign that she was getting frustrated, which she showed when she was fighting with Oliver.

Luckily, he recognized the symptoms.

"Look, I'm sorry ba-"

"Everybody inside. NOW." boomed Superman in his 'authority' voice.

Everyone complied.

...

"Hey! Finally! A little help here would be nice, sometime this millennia." jabbed Roy, who was currently very disturbed by the weird tingling feeling that was crawling up his back at a very slow pace...

Robin cackled at the sight, and Wally let loose a few snickers, but they were both silenced by a few stern looks.

M'gaan however, immediately rushed forward

"Roy! Let me help!" she exclaimed as she levitated him out of the tub onto the ground...or at least half a foot off the ground. He landed with a thud.

"Ooof...thanks M'gaan."

Roy the realized something even more horrifying that any thought that had crossed his mind during his stint in the bathtub.

"Uhh...I can't feel my legs. Or the better part of my spine..."

"You've got to be kidding me..." mumbled Superman, picking up the pudding soaked archer like a ragdoll and placing him on the coach...badly staining it.

"Now. Answers. First, Robin, explain the call you made to me."

Robin looked sheepish, as he smiled awkwardly before answering.

"Well...you see...it's all WALLY'S fault!"

"WHAT?! Robin you two-timing-"

"SEE! I knew it Dinah! That boy is no goo-"

"Everybody screaming hurts my super hearing! Can't I just watch static in peace?"

"So Wally made you call me as if you were a ho-"

"Oh no! Everything is going wrong! I should have finished watching the episode where they had truth or dare!"

"Roy, you never finished talking about Babs..."

"Hah! You LIKED it Artemis!"

"Oh, Babs is a real interesting person-"

"ROY!"

"Well Baywatch, what I like is the thought of taking one of these arrows and shoving it right up your flirty little -"

Suddenly, a shrill scream broke through the air, silencing everyone, and causing a certain half-kryptonian to clutch his hears painfully.

Black Canary stood in the center of the room, looking disapprovingly at each and every person in the room.

"Everyone sit. Now."

Everyone complied, save Batman and Superman.

Canary glared. Superman sat. Batman glared back.

Canary glared harder.

Batman sat.

Black Canary turned to Robin, before continuing.

"Everyone will get a chance to speak. Especially you two-" Canary looked pointedly at Wally and Artemis, who were still in their cake splattered wedding attire, despite Zatanna having changed everyone else back into their normal clothing.

"Robin, you're up first. And you have a lot to answer for."

The Boy Wonder gulped, but was relieved to notice Batman's fingers remaining ever so close to his utility belt.

"Well...it was a really boring morning.."

* * *

"And that's how Roy ended up in the bathtub, and this wedding was born." finished Robin, his cheeks a light shade of red.

There was silence for a few moments, until Superman spoke, half angry, half chuckling.

"Well, Lois is never going to believe this..."

Batman was now glaring at his protégé/son, but he made a mental note to congratulate him later for messing with the Kryptonian's head. And to give him pointers on how to cheat voice recognition systems.

"I still can't believe you guys went through all that just for stupid game." mumbled Green Arrow, who was still hoping that Artemis would jump up and accuse Wally of something, _anything_, that could justify sending a few somewhat(very) lethal explosive arrows his way. Preferably something along the lines of physical assault. The boy had not only managed to grope his niec-, _protégé, _but had also probably felt her up when she was on his lap. The pervert.

_If he runs that way, I can adjust for his speed by aiming somewhere over ..but wait, he might turn around, so maybe if I use multiple arrows...or I could-_

Black Canary interrupted his lethal thoughts as the others started to get up(save Roy, who was, as of now, still numb waist down), knowing full well what was going on in her partner's mind.

"Ahem. Where do you think you are all going? This conversation isn't over. In fact, it isn't over until _everyone_ here explains their view of what happened, since Robin here deemed it necessary to leave out a few details. Such as why his tux had lipstick stains all over. Or-"

Black Canary walked over the janitor's closet, and yanked the door open.

-Why there's a shredded pink tutu in this closet, which I know for a fact wasn't there yesterday afternoon."

Black Canary turned to Wally.

"Your turn."

* * *

"And THAT, is how Boy Evil here, turned a nice little morning game into a Pandora's box of nightmares."

"That doesn't even make sense Baywatch. Pandora's box-"

"Hey! Don't interrupt me when it's my turn to talk!"

"Your turn just ended Kid Stupid."

"No it didn't!"

"Wally, Artemis. Maybe you should separate to different ends of the room." advised Black Canary.

"Yeah. Right Now." threatened Green Arrow.

"You know, for two people who supposedly hate each other, you both spend a lot of time together..." mentioned Zatanna, leaving the sentence in the air as the two separated.

"Humph. I can't help it if my honey-good looks attract-" Wally didn't finish that sentence, as an arrow pierced the couch behind him.

Black Canary turned to glare at Green Arrow.

"What? It just slipped from my fingers! I swear!"

"Maturity Oliver. Maturity. Speaking of which, Artemis, your turn to tell us your side of the story.",

"Well, it all _really_ started when-"

No one noticed that, as this little impromptu confession session went on, Batman had slipped away into the shadows...to the control room. Where he was currently copying all the camera footage in and outside of Mount Justice since 9:00 A.M.

No one messes with Batman's son. Even if he messed with you.

* * *

"In my opinion, this whole thing is probably some absurd little prank gone wrong made up by Boy Blunder and Kid Idiot here."

"Name calling!" said Robin, sticking his tongue out.

"What are we five here?" retorted Roy.

Even though his current position on the far couch, and lack of ability to move his leg, left him unable to see _anyone_ or move around to see them, years of babysitting had ingrained a 6th sense into Roy's head, allowing him to just _know_ when Robin or Kid Flash were acting childish.

Which sadly for his babysitting years, was most of the time.

Black Canary ignored Roy's comments, knowing delving into that territory would most certainly draw Green Arrow in, and if those two got in argument with everyone else in the room, all bets were off.

"Kaldur. You're next."

* * *

"And thus, I would like to conclude by stating that I do not think any serious harm has truly come from this mornings events, although some of us may be a bit more peeved than others."

"Superboy?"

"I hate monkeys."

...

"Care to elaborate?" asked Canary, raising an eyebrow.

"No. I hate monkeys. And as of this morning, I also hate ice. I had to come into contact with large quantities of both in this game." replied Superboy, emotionless as ever.

"Ok...I guess that leaves, Zatanna, M'gaan, and Roy."

"Oh! Can I go first! I had so much fun!" asked M'gaan, waving her hand in the air enthusiastically.

"I suppose."

* * *

"And it was just amazing! I got to see the town, and met some interesting people, and I got to make an Earth-Wedding! A wedding!" concluded M'gaan, brimming with even more energy than when she started.

"At least one of you has a positive outlook." stated Batman, appearing from nowhere as he headed towards the Zeta Tubes.

"I just needed to grab somethings. And now I'm needed at Gotham. And Superman? You've got a problem in Metropolis. It's Lois. She just called me asking where you were. Apparently you haven't been answering your phone."

Batman smirked at the last comment, before the Zeta Tubes teleported him out.

Superman nearly cursed as he rushed to the tubes to transport back to Metropolis.

"This isn't over Robin. You're going to have to apologize to Lois." he shouted to Robin before he teleported out.

_Great. Lois Lane. The woman whose wrath makes even Batman wince. Well, not as much as Wonder Woman's wrath but.._

"I guess that just leaves you and me. Less witnesses." said Green Arrow. With a not so subtle hint of conspiratorial homicidal meaning behind the words.

Black Canary ignored his comment as well. She would talk him off for his behavior later.

"Zatanna, your turn."

* * *

"So..yeah. It was kind of fun, I guess." finished the junior magician.

"Kind of? Please. I saw what you and Robin were doing. And from where I was standing, you and Robin were having a _lot_ of fun. Especially when you thought you were in the kitchen. All alone." retorted Roy

"Roy..." threatened Robin, to no avail as both his and Zatanna's cheeks started blushing.

"What? Honest is the best policy. Besides, we have yet to breach the whole _Babs_ conspiracy. And speaking of conspiracies, in case you have an urge to speak about the Maui Incident, I have a crystal clear memory of the BW gala of '09, and what you did there."

Robin's eyes widened, but this was not noticeable behind the shades.

_Should never have left him long enough in that tub to fish out blackmail from his babysitting days._

"Weeell, I would most certainly love to hear what you have to say, Roy." said Wally, looking a little too smug.

"Then turn me around dodo brain." replied Roy, wiping the smug he knew was on Wally's face into nothingness.

Wally mumbled a few things that only Superboy could hear as he zipped from his spot to quickly move Wally around so that he now sat upright on the couch, facing everyone.

_Finally. The blood is rushing back to my feet._

"No, were was I? Oh yeah. I believe it my turn, right Canary?"

"Yes it is." replied Canary.

"Well, I believe we should start from the beginning..."

**Yes. I am EVIL. And no, Robin will not be able to stop Roy's revenge. I think it's about time Roy started making people pay for leaving him in a bathtub of hardening pudding for an hour. Roy lovers, ASSEMBLE!**


	13. Chapter 13

**99 REVIEWS! The 100th reviewer get's a shout out...and get's to decide the outcome of the cliffhanger I leave...**

**Disclaimer: I own Young Justice. Hah. No I don't, just testing to see if you're paying attention.**

**July 10, 11:45 A.M, Mount Justice**

"And _that_ was when they, in the middle of their little pecking game, finally noticed my presence. But frankly, I think if they hadn't noticed me for just a little longer, thing's could've gotten a little more...interesting." finished Roy, wiggling his eyebrow suggestively towards his audience.

"I mean, I always knew Boy Smooth here knew had game, but honestly, I can't help but wonder if he wouldn't have taken advantage of Zatanna here...or was it it the other way around?" continued the archer, who was thoroughly enjoying relaying his story to the rest of the team, plus Canary and Green Arrow, with only a few(a lot) of embellished details. And he still hadn't gotten around to the Babs explanation, something that perplexed Zatanna and kept Robin thanking god.

Roy knew things. Too many things.

_Revenge achieved. Legs are now useable again. Life is good._

"Enough." Robin managed to choke out, his face now as red as his costume.

Zatanna on the other hand, had lost any embarrassment she had several minutes ago

No, rather she felt somewhat proud as Artemis stole her subtle glances and smirks her direction, with a raised eyebrow or two tossed into the mix, and M'gaan not so subtly gaped openmouthed at her during some parts of Roy's story.

"Why Robin, if I didn't know better, I would think you were blushing." replied Roy, humored sarcasm dripping from each word.

Robin clenched his jaw, not willing to risk giving Roy another jab at him.

"This pudding is funny. It shouldn't be hardening that fast." stated Connor, poking the still hardening gooey mass that occupied the bathtub _still_ placed in the middle of room.

"Now that you mention it, that is kind of weird." agreed Roy, his eyes narrowing as everyone turned to look at Wally.

"What?" asked the speedster.

"Am I missing something?" asked Green Arrow, still looking for a reason to skewer Wally.

"It was Wally's pudding that went into that bathtub..." answered Kaldur

"Well..you see...I may have modified my mini-fridge just a little bit, increasing it's efficiency and power...somewhat...and some brands of pudding you know...and things are just..." stuttered Wally.

Artemis rolled her eyes.

_Just my luck. I get married, and it's to a guy who manages to mutate pudding._

"Well, Wally, thanks, I guess. If you hadn't messed up the pudding, I would never have seen Robin and-"

"That's enough Roy." interjected Black Canary.

"You've all had your turn to explain. I expect this mess to be cleaned and everyone to be ready for extra sparring classes by tomorrow, since you all seem rather bored." she continued, prompting a few groan from the group.

"Well, I'll leave you all to it. I do believe I'm due for a shopping trip." she finished, turning towards the zeta tubes.

Oliver wasn't so willing to leave.

"But, but, they, we, I-"

He was promptly silenced by _the look._

He knew that look. Oliver Queen was very familiar with that look. It meant he was in trouble. It meant he better shut up that very instant.

So he did, walking over to the zeta tubes with his partner looking like a kicked puppy.

"You know" began Canary as the Zeta Tube recognized them.

"-I kind of find it funny that Wally and Artemis got married, before us."

Green Arrow's eyes burst open in a comically hilarious manner, the last the team saw of him as he was teleported back to the watchtower, prompting a few giggles.

...

"Well, know what?" asked Wally, standing near the TV, which was now Connor's apparent focus of attention.

"We could play another game!" piped up M'gaan, but all she got in response was a few glares and a grunt from Connor.

"Oh, well, we could finish playing this game."

"_NO._" replied Robin, Roy, and Artemis simultaneously.

"Well, maybe a few more rounds couldn't hurt..." offered Wally, somehow having recovered from the major wedding fiasco that he had just been engulfed in.

Roy responded by shooting an arrow at where he was standing. Of course it missed, but it ended up hitting the TV a few feet behind Wally's previous spot.

"Argh!" exclaimed Connor, his static viewing moments of peace now ruined.

"Look at what you did!" complained Wally to Roy, gesturing to the TV, and the now angered half-kryptonian.

"Maybe if you were a little less, I don't know, oblivious to the surrounding atmosphere, I wouldn't have to send such blunt messages your way."

And thus, an argument was born.

* * *

"What are you doing?" asked Flash, zipping into one of the Watchtower's many sub-control rooms, and annoying a certain dark knight who happened to be fiddling with some technological instruments.

"Nothing of your concern."

"Really? 'Cause I just finished conversing with Superman during a little pit stop to Metropolis, and they talking about some truth or dare fiasco down on Mount Justice. He didn't elaborate much else. Probably had something to do with the background noise. Sounded like a pretty pissed off woman."

"Like I said, what I am doing here is nothing of your concern." repeated Batman, becoming more irked by the second.

As if the world wanted to prove just how much wanted to annoy Batman, Black Canary and Green Arrow happened to walk, err, stumble in, disentangling themselves from each other as they saw Batman and Flash.

Of course, they weren't fast enough to stop Flash from taking a very, _interesting_, picture, while snickering.

Batman never turned around from the screens he was facing. Green Arrow and Black Canary couldn't be left alone for more than ten minutes together, and he knew it.

It was the reason Batman never sought them out when they were both 'missing'. And the reason Roy never, _ever_, appeared at the Oliver estate unannounced. Not again. Hell, it was the reason he got into the habit of knocking, even when he lived there.

"Well, ahem. What is going on here?" asked Black Canary, straightening her hair and shirt as she got up, looking as unfazed as ever.

_Dammit Oliver. I'm supposed to be mad at you._

"There you guys are! We've been looking all over for you." said Green Arrow, lamely.

"Yeah...right." taunted Flash, smiling from ear to ear.

Suddenly, the screen became blurred, some static appearing on it, before it finally settled, showing...the Munt Justice living room.

"Ah, Batman? I'm pretty sure there's some ethical-"

"Reconnaissance. Team observation. Adult Supervision."

"You know, as much as I would _love_ to spy on our teenage protégé's, I just don't think-"

"Quiet Flash! Batman has a point! Adult Supervision." stated Green Arrow, the fire back in his eyes as he glared at Wally's image.

"Say's the man who was just getting ready to dish out his own 'supervision' to a certain blonde bombshell..." muttered Flash.

Flash wasn't jealous. No siree, Barry Allen was taken. But having his super-hot wife hang around his work place all day would have probably made him feel better.

The attention of all four heroes was soon fixated on the screen, with trivial things such as 'respect' and 'privacy' quickly forgotten n the midst of paranoia, mistrust, disbelief, and sexual tension.

Guess which came from whom.

* * *

"I cannot believe we are doing this, AGAIN." exclaimed Artemis, throwing up her arms in defeat.

The last five minutes had somehow brought attention back to this abomination of a game, and Wally, Robin, and Roy, the resident troublemakers, had decided that they were indeed, suicidal enough to go for another round.

Or rather, they had taunted each other enough to get the same results.

"Well you better believe it." muttered Robin, grabbing for the bottle and spinning.

And it spun. And spun. And...

**The world blew up!..No it didn't. Come on, lucky 100th reviewer. You, yes, YOU, get to decide the next move. Well...most of it. :P Read. Review. The story lives ON, despite my original plans to end it with the arrival of the adults. Let's see how long we can drag this out. **


	14. Chapter 14

**Congrats to RobinLover321, who was the 100th reviewer! Unfortunately, RL321 did not leave a request...but the 101st reviewer, purplepeace did, so we will be going with that request. Somebody naked followed by extreme awkwardness...This is going to be fun for me. Also, THE CHOCOLATE COOKIES HAVE RETURNED. The legacy lives on.**

**As for calls for Zatanna to host Wally and Artemis, I must first get those two next to each other again, which was bound to happen sooner or later. **

**A moment of silence for them.**

**Heheh. Moment over.**

**Disclaimer: I own this plot. I own the actions of the characters in this story. I retain the right to change the name to Kid Justice, switch everybody's name by one word, and then make my own TV show using this plot. :P**

**July 10, 12:05 P.M, Mount Justice**

..It landed on Wally, with Zatanna as his host.

Wally gulped, loudly, and Robin snickered.

"Truth or Dare Wally?" she asked coolly.

"Truth." replied Wally, replying so quickly he was almost speed talking.

"Ha." snorted Artemis, not loudly, but loud enough for a certain speedster to hear.

"What do you mea 'ha'?" questioned Wally, not willing to give an inch of his pride to Artemis, even if it meant saving a mile.

"It figures the you would chicken out to save your behind, isn't that right, _hubby?_" she taunted.

"So, you have been paying attention to my behind, have you, _wifey_?"

"Gross! Why don't you come down from whatever drug induced high you're on and man up Kid Bozo."

Robin opened his mouth to put in a stinging remark, but Zatanna put a finger to his lips before he spoke, hushing him. No way was she going to interrupt this, at least not before Wally fell into the trap that Artemis had unknowingly placed him in. Which should be pretty soon

_3..2..1..._

"I don't need to prove anything to you harpy! But just to show I've got a better spine than you, Zatanna, I change my answer. Dare. And hit me with the worst dare you've got!"

"I'd be happy to oblige...Cookies. Chocolate chip cookies. You need to eat them."

"What? That's all?" asked Wally, slightly confused.

"Here," said Zatanna, as she chanted a spell and suddenly Wolf was covered from head to toe in cookies. Somehow, he was _still_ sleeping.

"You need to eat those cookies. All of them. Right off of Wolf, and without waking him up, or using super speed to move or eat the cookies at a super pace. I'd get to it though. The sleeping potion I casted on him only lasts for about half an hour, and if those cookies aren't eaten by then, Wolf is going to wake up, covered in cookies, with a speedster that has a penchant for poking him eating food off of his back."

Wally gaped, open mouthed, as he had a mental flashback to all the times he had been 'just playing' with the animal, and it's tendency to glare at him, much like it's owner.

"Bu, but, that's, that's just cruel! There are like, a thousand cookies there!"

"Yeah, it is. Wolf deserves better. And there are only 268 cookies there. " finished Zatanna, with a smirk, causing a few chuckles.

"Connor?! You really want to do this to Wolf?" asked Wally, desperate.

"Do what to him? This gives him a chance at payback for all those times you pinched, poked, prodded, or otherwise harassed him. Besides, we all know you'll run if he wakes up." answered Connor.

"Yeah, so you might want to get to it." sniggered Robin.

With a groan, and no mercy from his teammates, Wally got up and headed to his inevitable doom, and Zatanna spun the bottle.

* * *

"Hah! I always told him arguing with a woman was a stupid idea." said Flash, watching the events unfold from the Watchtower.

"Pfft. You're only saying that because you're married." teased Green Arrow

"Give it a few years GA. You'll be in just as deep as I am." replied Flash.

Black Canary, now sitting in a chair, just shook her head at the bickering two, before returning her attention to the screen.

Yes, spying on them was wrong. But at the same time, it just seemed so right...I mean, they were their mentors. Was it not their job to know what was going on? And how bad could it really be? It's not like the kids would find out...

And that's how Black Canary, the master of logic, the grand therapist of the league, tricked herself into breaking all of her own rules on privacy and trust, in less than a few minutes.

* * *

"Truth or Dare, Artemis?" asked Roy, wild plans to embarrass her to no end suddenly whirling through his minds at speeds that could compete with Wally.

Artemis scowled, replying with a quick "Dare."

She wasn't going to be interrogated by Roy of all people, and she most certainly wasn't going to back down from any dare he threw at her.

"Argh! These cookies must be cursed or something. I swear, I never tasted a cookie I didn't like until today.." mumbled Wally in the background

"Figured you'd choose a dare. Unfortunately for you, this dare requires you to have a change of clothing, so, you might want to head to your room. There's a present for you on your bed. It's your new outfit for...well, until either this game ends, or I feel an urge to be merciful." replied Roy, speaking in a very smug voice while he reached for the bottle, making a show of stretching his legs before walking to it.

Artemis scoffed as she got up to leave for her room.

On her way there, she stopped by Wally, who was current on wolf's back, using his teeth to grab onto the next cookie and begin munching it slowly, hoping to avoid swallowing any fur.

Artemis slapped his back, setting of a couching spree.

"Urgh-"cough"fur-"cough"so nasty"-more coughs.

* * *

"Shouldn't we switch the camera's to her room and see this 'present' Roy left for her?" asked Green Arrow

"Yeah. And risk seeing a teenage girl in the middle of the process of changing her clothes. Real smart GA." retorted Flash, to which Green Arrow's cheeks turned red.

"Oh. Right."

"Shush, I'm trying to listen." said Black Canary.

"Listen to what?"

At this all three heroes froze, recognizing the voice immediately, before slowly turning their heads to the source of it, with mortified expressions on their face. Only Batman remained nonchalant, speaking up for the first time since Flash appeared.

"About time you showed up Superman."

* * *

"Truth or Dare Kaldur?" asked Robin, already having come up with three contingencies for either answer.

But before Kaldur could answer, a shrill scream broke the air, followed by a much angrier roar, both of which caused Wally swallow another clump of fur.

"ROY!" screamed Artemis from her room, holding her 'present' in her hands with a mixed look for pure rage .

It was horrible. Vilifying. Perverted.

It was a yellow and red bikini.

A Kid Flash bikini...

* * *

**What? Didn't think I was actually going to let someone get completely naked did you? **

**Sorry for the shorter chapter, but quicker updates = shorter chapters. :/ Mainly because I don't feel as guilty as when I take longer to update.**

**So, leave your ideas in a review, and some lucky reviewers will get their ideas featured in here. Feedback is also always appreciated as well.**


	15. Chapter 15

**Some great ideas in the reviews, especially from tardis-blue-jay and Zatanna Carrile! Also, I would like to mention that, instead of having Roy/Artemis doing the whole "suspicion/traitor/replacement" dance, I'll make it more of a tense brother/sister like rivalry, since Artemis, Roy, Black Canary, and Green Arrow are like family, albeit a semi-dysfunctional one. Also, don't get used to quick updates...I'm just on a roll right now.**

**And unfortunately, Rocket will not be making an appearance in this fic, at least not until the final chapter. So I guess I just saved Kaldur from being horribly humiliated. For now.**

**Disclaimer: I own the plot, I share ownership of the ideas with many, many reviewers, but I do not own the series.**

**July 10, 12:30, Mount Justice**

"What exactly did you do Roy?" asked M'gaan, slightly worried.

Even Connor showed distress on his face, as with his super-hearing, he could quite clearly the string of seemingly never ending curses coming from Artemis's mouth. And boy did she have a colorful vocabulary.

"Oh, I just got something for her from our last shopping trip Black Canary, which I was _forced_ to go along, against my very will." replied Roy, reflecting on said shopping trip.

...

_"Ooh!" squealed Artemis in a very un-Artemis like fashion, as she started at what was apparently the most popular pair shoes known to the planet's female population. Today._

_"Nice taste! I'm sure Oliver won't mind if we grab a pair of these, or two." said Black Canary, ignoring the horribly large price tag that the shoes came with._

_After all, if Oliver could buy suits that cost him more than her monthly rent used to, then why should he care about a few shoes?_

_Roughly 25 feet behind them trying to remain as distant as possible without prompting Black Canary, err, 'Dinah', to turn around and beckon him to come closer by practically shouting his name out for everyone in the mall to hear, stood a very unhappy looking Roy, muttering to himself._

_"'It'll be fun!' she said. 'It's a great bonding experience.' she said. 'I'll tell Oliver about how you trashed his Lamborghini' she said. Bonding experience my a-"_

_"Roy! Get over here! We're heading towards Victoria's Secret!" called Dinah._

_Roy would have melted, but he refused to give Artemis the satisfaction. The little blondie was already having enough fun, shopping to her heart's content._

_"Oh, I get to stand outside a woman's store while they buy expensive lingerie too! But when I want to go buy something simple, like an explosive arrow or two... hundred..."_

Roy shook his head, snapping out of his thoughts as Robin turned back to Kaldur.

"Turth or Dare?"

"Truth." replied the Atlantean. He had few secrets, and from what he had observed today, including the recent screams of what appeared to be excruciating pain and anger combined coming from Artemis's room, he wasn't feeling stupid enough, nor reckless enough, to risk his luck and calm composition on a dare.

Especially not with the wildcat Robin, who, for the last few weeks, had been acting especially erratic around Zatanna.

"Well, Kaldur, why is it you refuse to avoid seaweed?" asked Robin

Wally groaned in betweek mouthfuls of repulsive chocolate chip cookies and Wolf hair, but shut up quickly as Wolf stirred a little underneath him

This wasn't the first time Robin brought up this subject_._

"As I've said to you before, many times, I refuse to eat sea food." replied Kaldur, slightly irritated.

"But it's _seaweed!_ It's not fish or crabs or lobster. It's just a plant!"

"A plant that came from the sea! Where I grew up!"

"Oh, so what did you eat in Atlantis? Certainly with all the fish around you must have eaten some seafood?"

"Actually no. We ate Atlantean food, such as Atlanfish and Tis Reeds."

"But that's the same as seafood!"

"No it isn't! Seafood came from the sea, and the oceans. Seafood consists of animals and plants that are protected by Atlantis! Atlantean food grows within Atlantis or food that has, by the Atlantis Convention of the year-"

"Oh, don't bring that back up again! By your own words, that was rendered null and void by the Official Sea Charter Compromise of-"

"Ah, there you are wrong my friend. For truly-"

So, while Boy Wonder, the master of getting under peoples' skin, and Kaldur, the seemingly never undeterred source of reason, bickered over seaweed like children, another argument was brewing above the sky.

* * *

"You guys are WHAT?" bellowed Superman

"In my defense, I was against it the whole time!" said Flash, prepared to make a run for the nearest Zeta Tube if necessary.

"Oh really, then why were you here the whole time Mr. High and Mighty?" asked Green Arrow, not appreciating the lack of support.

"This is wrong!" continued Superman

"You're right. We're invading their privacy." said Black Canary, sheepishly.

"No. We're supervising them to make sure they don't do anything stupid." countered Batman, still not turning from the screens.

"Like what? They're a bunch of kids."

"Like that." replied Batman, prompting all three of the bickering heroes to turn to the screen.

"Son of a-"

"_Oliver!_"

"Sorry."

* * *

Wally grabbed his throat, couching up a violatile mixture of fur and cookies, his eyes bulging out comically at the scene before him as he fell off of Wolf's back and landed on with the ground against his back, his eyes unable to move from their spectale in front of him.

Robin cackled uncontrollably and Zatanna tried, but failed, to stifle her giggles while Roy merely smirked at Artemis in an evil manner.

Only M'gaan and Kaldur looked embarrassed for their friend, and Connor just seemed very unconmfortable with the situation

"Quit staring Baywatch, and get back to eating those fur cookies before I shove a few down your throat." growled Artemis, already covering her embarrassment with anger and quickly taking a seat _back-f__acing_ Wally.

She may technically be married, but Kid Idiot was still Kid Idiot.

Of course, her logic only backfired, as the view of her long back only continued Wally's seizure of uncontrollable coughing, which was increasing at an alarming rate.

It took a few moments for the cackling to die down, although Wally was still coughing in the background, before Robin spoke again.

"Tell me, Roy, how exactly do you know Artemis's bikini size?" he asked, raising an eyebrow conspiratorially.

"If you spent exactly 42 minutes standing with me in a beach-wear store holding 10 pounds of clothes while Artemis and Black Canary abused Oliver's credit score senseless, you wouldn't be asking me that question." replied Roy, still bitter about that particular store.

He had been hit on by exactly 14 different girls in that store, stared weirdly at by half a dozen dudes, received three sympathetic looks from old, married, bald men, and been given what could be called nothing but a salacious wink by a punk-style guy whom he had the sudden irresistible urge to strangle.

Robin just cackled some more as Wally finally stopped coughing, only managing to sputter out a few words.

"Is..is that a K-kid flash b-b-ikini?"

"Well no duh Sherlock. You get a good look because I can practically feel your eyes boring into my back." snarled Artemis, causing Wally to blush profusely as he tried to look anywhere else.

"You know, you should really get back to finishing those coookiieees." finished Zatanna in a singsong voice while gesturing towards the time.

Wally, now thoroughly shell-shocked, embarrassed and still in grave danger of being attacked by an angry Wolf-like creature, sulkily returned to the task at hand. Thankfully he was nearing it's end.

* * *

"See? SEE?!" exclaimed Green Arrow, gesturing wildy towards the screen.

"_That _is why we need to supervise them! They practically stripped her of her clothes, and then, ugh!"

"Calm down GA! It's just a little harmless teenage fun." chuckled Flash, all previous remorse for his nephew now lost.

_He could learn a lot from this. Heheh._

"I-uh-" stuttered Superman, blushing at the sight on the screen like the Big Blue Boy Scout he was often referred to as by a certain Dark Knight.

"You as can see Superman, this situation calls for supervision from afar, just as I predicted. Leave if you don't like it." stated Batman in the voice he reserved when speaking to an stupider than usual villain, Flash, Hal Jordan, or Superman.

Superman didn't even get to respond, as thanks to his super hearing, he suddenly picked up the sounds of a struggle from the far end of the Watchtower.

"Let me go! You can't just trap in me some green bubble!" screamed an angry woman-like voice.

"Ma'am, I'm going to have to show you to the detention center. I really need to know how you got here and what you-"

_Crud._

Superman sped out of the room at maximum speed.

"What got into him?" asked Flash.

Batman actually smiled, although none of them saw, as he replied "Oh, he must have realized that Lois arrived."

* * *

Robin finally spun the bottle, still giving in to bouts of laughter every few seconds, until the bottle landed.

At which point his body visibly froze.

"Truth or Dare, Roy?"

Roy flashed a toothy grin, greatly enjoying his luck today. It was as if the world was paying him back for knocking him unconscious and tossing him in a tub.

He then uttered a sentence that would either get him killed in his sleep, get Robin murdered by one of two pissed girls, or probably some mixture of both.

"Why Zatanna, truth of course."

* * *

**Eh, we might have to take Roy down a peg or two later on, but for now, I think we all know what Zatanna is going to be asking about.**

**Poor Robin. And poor Superman too, because he now has a severely pissed off Lois Lane, on the watchtower...I wonder how she got there?**

***Laughs Evilly***


	16. Chapter 16

**Hurrah! Hurrah! Back to back update days! Beforehand, I apologize for any grammar mistakes in past/present/future chapters. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot, which is semi-owned with reviewers. **

**July 10, 12:45 A.M, Mount Justice**

"I can't believe this! First the stupid faux hooker phone call, then you disappear, then you reappear again to barely explain anything to me before disappearing, _again_, and then I'm manhandled by Green Lantern! What the hell is happening to the world's Superheroes today!" shouted a one Lois Lane at Superman, in front of a crowd of assorted heroes that was growing at an alarming rate.

Superman was equally embarrassed and horrified at the situation, and quickly attempted to pacify his fiancée(**A/N: yes, fiancée, 'cause, well, I like that**.)

"Lois, this neither the time nor the place for such a conver-"

"So when and where Mr. Man of Steel? We barely started speaking before you ended the discussion, blaming the whole thing on Bats. Which reminds me, where is he? I'd like to give him a piece of my mind!"

Superman quickly grabbed Lois, picked her up bridal style, and zoomed back to the control room, leaving a very intruiged cast of superheroes

...

Superman barged into the room, and then closed it behind them and used his heat vision to melt the door shut, before finally putting Lois down.

"Tell me, what was the practicality in that?" she asked, stilled very annoyed with him.

"Privacy. Plus, you wanted to meet Batman, so here he is."

Lois turned to see not only Batman, but Black Canary, Flash, and Green Arrow.

And a giant set of screens showing several of their protégés.

"So, is anyone going to tell me what is going on?"

* * *

"That isn't fair! You guys planned this." protested Robin, his brain now functioning once again.

"Planned what? And how?" asked Roy, feigning innocence.

"Yeah, and besides, all I did was ask him a simple question. 'Who is Babs?' I mean, there's nothing sinister about that, right?" continued Zatanna, although her tone did not match her statements.

"Now, as I was going to say, Babs is short for Barbara, and she is a _very_ close friend of Robin here. In fact, so close that they tend to spend quite a lot of time together. In fact, one would say they spend so much time together, they would have to be dating."

"That's speculation! And false speculation too! I am not, nor have I ever been in any relationship with a Barbara Go-Barbara." said Robin correcting his slip up at the last second.

He could practically feel Batman scowling at him for the mistake, which coincidentally, he was.

"Right, so that time when we were all stuck on the yacht and you to-"

"Was nothing. Now, you already answered the question." finished Robin, with a glare.

Roy just chuckled, as Zatanna felt a little bit of pride at having outsmarted the Boy Wonder, although she still felt cheated of a proper answer.

"Fair enough Boy Wonder." she said as she reached for the bottle.

At that moment, Wally got off of Wolf's back, clutching his stomach.

"Ooh. Cookies. Finished. Ooooohhhh..." he groaned putting a hand to his mouth and zipping off at super speed to the nearest bathroom as Wolf stirred a little before getting up , shaking some crumbs off, and moving near Superboy to continue his nap.

"Serves him right." muttered Artemis, but not without the slightest hint of worry lacing her words.

"Well, let's wait for him to return." suggested Robin in a not-so-innocent tone.

* * *

"So, to clear things up, you guys are spying on your protégés using secret cameras, breaching their privacy and trust in you guys, to watch them play _truth or dare?_"

"You don't understand! There was a fake wedding, and she's in a bikini! Surely that warrants some action!" exclaimed Green Arrow

"Please, I've done far worse things in party games like truth or dare, especially when I was their age. But I do think the prank call was a funny idea." replied the feisty reporter.

"But you jut spend half the morning screaming at me about that!"

"Well, Cl,-Superman, if you had bothered to give me more than a rushed 5-sentence explanation, maybe I wouldn't have been so mad!"

"Which brings us back to the question, how did you get here?" said Flash, interrupting the two.

Lois just smirked at him, before adding "Well, Superman may have given me _few_ tours of the Watchtower, you know, just to let me get the lay of the land."

"Oh, _really?_ But when I want to bring my wife, Iris, whom I am _already_ married to, onboard, Superman here reads me the Riot Act. No preferential treatment, remember? No placing civilians in danger, remember?"

"If you five are done bickering like children, I'm trying to keep tabs on this surveillance op." interjected a surly Batman.

* * *

When Wally returned, he was finally back in his normal clothes, although he did look a pale shader than normal, and still seemed a bit queasy.

"Worst snack of my life...I don't think I can ever look at a chocolate chip cookie, or any cookie, ever again." he said, attempting a glare at Zatanna and Robin, but giving up and instead taking a seat as far away as he could from them and Wolf...which put him right next to Artemis.

"Funny how you two always can't stay away from each other." remarked Roy, eyeing the two suspiciously.

He was already deep in enough in his pseudo-relationship with Jade. No way could he handle an Artemis-Wally relationship.

_No. Just..no._

"Truth or Dare Robin?" asked M'gaan, having found herself the host of the Boy Wonder.

"Dare." he replied with a heavy air of confidence and bravado.

"I dare you to do '7 Minutes in Heaven' with Artemis!" squealed M'gaan.

Wally started coughing again, and Artemis just threw her hands into the air in defeat as she got up and walked with Robin towards the infamous closet.

Robin didn't seem the least bit fazed as he replied with a confident "Sure", even winking slyly at Wally before entering the room. He failed to notice a glare from Zatanna.

In the Watchtower, Bruce mentally slapped his head for clearly failing to teach Robin anything about women, aside from being a good flirt.

The boy was clearly oblivious, or he would have at least _tried_ to look mortified at the prospect of what he was about to do. Between this, and his botched handling of Batgirl's repeated appearances in conversations, it would be a wonder if Batman himself didn't have to intervene to save his life.

"M'gaan! What were you thinking?!" asked Wally in horror, as Roy and Kaldur looked on with bemused interest.

"What? 7 Minutes in Heaven is a great game! They get to spend 7 minutes talking about what they think heaven looks like! That's what 'Moe' from _The Three Stooges_ said. Of course, Curly disagreed, but-"

"Wait, you got your info from _The three stooges?_" asked Wally, incredulously.

"Well, yes. They're a great source for how normal man-friends interact, and help me get a grasp on an insight to the brains of normal adult males. It's fascinating, but a little odd at times." replied M'gaan.

"_The three_ stooges?" burst out Roy, unable to hide his laughter.

Wally just groaned while M'gaan looked confused.

* * *

"You guys need to get some sort of Mars-to-Earth class or something." said Lois.

The other heroes couldn't do much more than agree with her.

* * *

The silence was palbale at the two sat awkwardly in the closet for nearly a minute, listening to their teammates try to educate M'gaan about the true purpose of "7 Minutes in Heaven", and the horrible inaccuracies the stooges tended to present.

Finally, Robin made eye-contact, a very Robin-esque grin on his face.

"Want to mess with Wally's head?" he asked, evilly.

"Always."

**XD**

**Between Wally, Artemis, Zatanna, Robin, and a suspicious Roy, this cannot end well...**

**Maybe the ever elusive Barbara Gor-Barbara will make an appearance...**


	17. Chapter 17

**Another quick update. Although for some reason, the last update didn't seem to be noticed by the Fanfiction system or something. I don't know. Anyway, here we are. I apologize if I botched Zatanna's personality in this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Young Justice. And if I need to repeat that one more time, my mind will explode.**

* * *

**July 10, 12:55 P.M, Mount Justice**

"I'm sorry M'gaan, but the stooges are part of a comedy act. Little of what they say is true and realistic compared to real life." explained Kaldur, trying to ease M'gaan's confusion.

Just as he was about to continue, loud, irregular..._sounds_ came from the closet, prompting just about everybody to freeze.

Then just like that, the sounds were gone.

"What wa-"

And then they were back, and then off again, and back, alternating every few seconds.

Kaldur's cheeks turned a slight pink, and Wally looked positively mortified at what he was hearing. M'gaan just looked even more confused than before.

Zatanna was a lot more rigid that before, and was now glaring with a large amount of hate at the closet door.

Only Connor could hear the near silent stifled giggling coming form the closet, but he just didn't feel like it was important enough to bring up. After all, the other day, he had softly heard half a dozen seagulls defecate on the beach.

_The downsides of super-hearing._

...

Artemis and Robin were nearly choking on their stifled laughter, as Robin's PDA (which he somehow procured from nowhere) played an edited audio scene from a random romantic film from the internet.

"What do you think is happening out there?" whispered Artemis

"What ever it is, it's going to be asterous."

* * *

"Is..are...what?" stammered Flash as the noises from the closet filtered into the air in the room.

"Could be an audio glitch." offered Black Canary

"Doubtful." replied Batman.

Using the bat-computer, he had already deduced the sounds were not a glitch, but were too artificial to be directly from a human. Most likely audio being played from an electronic device. Not that he was going to just tell them that.

_I really need to talk to Robin later, though. _

"So, then what the hell is going on in that closet?" roared Green Arrow.

"Sounds like some, 'recreational' activities." suggested Lois, not without a crooked grin.

Superman, the Boy Scout he was, now seemed to have all his attention focused on a particular spot on the floor.

"Ah, NO. Just, NO. I'm going down there and stopping this." exclaimed Green Arrow, heading to the exit, but halting upon realizing it was welded shut.

After failing to open door with his own strength, he turned to glare at Superman, and then Flash, and then Batman's cape.

"Am I the ONLY sane person here?"

"Calm down Green Arrow. I am 77.4% positive those noises are completely artificial." stated Batman.

"That's 22.6% not enough positive confirmation for me." replied the archer.

"Just sit down and watch with us Oliver." exasperated Black Canary

* * *

"_That's _what 7 minutes in heaven is? Wait, so they, oohhh." said M'gaan as realization came to her, thanks to Roy.

"Don't worry M'gaan. I'm sure they don't mind." remarked Roy, as another moan came from the closet.

"Robin's only 14! She's 16! It's just so wrong!"

"Maybe. Or maybe you're just jealous. You always were impulsive Wally, but with Artemis, I guess you were too slow." taunted Roy.

"Too slow? I got married to her! What she's doing is basically cheating! This is grounds for a divorce!"

"Wally..you know you didn't actually get married to Artemis, right?" asked Kaldur, slightly worried for his friend.

"Actually, given that, technically, by Atlantean laws, as Aqualad you do have the rights to ordain a wedding, for what reason I don't know, and technically, in some nations such as Angola, people as young as 15 can legally get married, once you factor in Mount Justice's somewhat undefined marriage laws currently in limbo, it could be argued that-"

"SEE! Married. Boom. Done." finished Wally, interrupting Connor's unsually in-depth explanation.

"Wally, you are head over heels." snickered Roy.

"Where did you learn all that?" asked Kaldur

"G-morphs." rpelied Connor.

"The genomorps know I can act as a minister?"

"No, that I heard from Aquaman during a series of highly inappropriate jokes he was making with one of the Green Lanterns and Green Arrow when all three of them thought no one could hear."

* * *

"You know, I never took Robin for the playboy type." comment Lois, ignoring the mounting awkwardness in the room.

"He's not." replied Batman tersely.

"Really? Because he's currently playing 7 minutes in heaven with a girl in a Kid Flash bikini while another girl, who, from the way she has been glaring at the closet and everyone who mentions the game for the last few minutes, is obviously jealous. So either he's a playboy, or completely naïve." pressed the reporter, unafraid of Batman.

"_Lois."_ pleaded Superman, trying to reign in his fiancée.

"What? Batman isn't nearly as scary as you made him out to be."

"Maybe we should go. We could have a nice lunch at-"

"Pfft. I'm on _the_ Watchtower, observing a group of superhero's shamelessly spy on their protégé's, who are doing shameless acts themselves. And you want me to miss this for lunch?" teased Lois.

It was going to be a long day.

* * *

Artemis and Robin exited closet, exactly 7 minutes since they entered it, carrying smug grins on their faces. They seemed oblivious to the bemused look from Roy, the embarrassed appearances of M'gaan and Kaldur, or the glares from Zatanna and Wally.

"Well...ah..." stammered Kaldur

"What? You guys didn't play while we were gone?" asked Robin, feigning shock.

"Nope." gritted Wally.

"Why? Were you distracted?" teased Artemis

"Were _you_?" snarled Zatanna in a surprisingly hostile voice that surprised both Artemis and Robin.

"Ah, no-not really." replied Robin

"Oh, is that right?" growled Wally, purposefully glaring at Robin instead of Artemis, because she was in a bikini and well...she was in a bikini.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know-"

"No need M'gaan. You're not the one in trouble." interrupted Zatanna.

"Did we miss something?"

"Maybe you did, buddy. Like the by-laws of the bro-code, which you spent the last 7 minutes violating."

"That? That's what's got your boxers in a bunch?"

And with that, Robin started laughing. Not cackling, but laughing. And soon, so was Artemis.

"Oh, so this is _funny_ to you guys?"

"Calm down Wally, it was just a joke." said Robin, in between laughter as he pulled out his PDA and hit 'play', showing his teammates the recording.

For a moment everyone was silent, and then Wally just threw up his hands and groaned angrily.

Roy just chuckled and said "Shame. Wally was so jealous."

"Jealous hmm?" asked Artemis.

"No." replied Wally just as Kaldur, Connor, and M'gaan said "Yes." in unison.

Wally's cheeks burned up as he stammered his reply

"Well, y-,he-, argh! I can be jealous if I want to. We're married! Connor said so!"

"Married? I think you're losing your sense of reality Baywatch."

"Nuh uh. We got married. Kaldur has the legal authority to do so, for whatever reason, and Connor says that there are enough legal loopholes to make the marriage legally binding."

"Then we're getting a divorce!"

"No can do! I don't see a lawyer here!"

"Well, actually, as aqualad, I am also a certified-"

"Shut it Kaldur!"

As Wally and Artemis argued over the finer points of their 'marriage', Robin and Zatanna weren't on the best terms either.

"So, were you jealous as well?" asked Robin, trying to diffuse the situation with some humor.

It backfired immediately, as Zatanna just gave him a sharp look, before folding her arms and looking away.

"What? It was just a joke!"

...

"I'm just going to spin the bottle." said M'gaan rather awkwardly.

"Yeah, you should probably do that." remarked Roy.

* * *

**Reviewers ASSEMBLE! Because I'm far too lazy and uncreative, I shall leave it to you faithful readers to decide who hosts who and etc. You guys know the drill. I think.**


	18. Chapter 18

**The back to back update days continue, at least for today! Thanks to all for reviewing. Chapter 18 has arrived! Credit to this Chapter's truth/dares go to RollingUpHigh, PrettyKityy Luvs U, and Princess Anna of Arendelle.**

**About time I start crediting people.**

**Disclaimer: I would claim I do not own Young Justice, but my head has exploded.**

* * *

**July 10, 1:05 P.M, Mount Justice**

"Truth or Dare Artemis?" asked Roy in a singsong voice.

"Dare."

"You just don't know when to give up, do you?"

"You just don't know when to shut up, do you?"

Roy just chuckled and shook his head as if he was speaking to a young child.

"I think I'll just stick with the classics. Artemis, I dare you to spend the rest of the game on Wally's lap. Of course, you will be forced to take part in the same dares and truths, but what should that matter? You guys are married now, aren't you?"

"There is no way I am sitting on his lap, dress like this!"

"Don't worry. I got something for you to cover up a little more. It's underneath your bed."

Grumbling, Artemis got up and went to her room, no doubt to find something she didn't like.

Roy, similing like an evil maniac, just proceeded to spin the bottle.

* * *

"We have to do something." stated Black Canary.

"Of course we do." said Flash, munching on what appeared to be his 3rd pizza.

"Hey, where are you getting those from?" asked Green Arrow.

"Vibrated in and out of the room to go steal some from the other side of the watchtower. I'm pretty sure the Green Lanterns, and Hawkman, are more than a little pissed right now."

"What? Then you can go down there!"

"No way! They'll suspect immediately! And, they have a mind reader! Emphasis on _mind_!"

"No one is going anywhere until I leave with Lois." grumbled Superman as Lois somehow managed to snag a slice of pizza from Flash. She was rather enjoying her time in this confined room. Which meant she wasn't going anywhere

Batman however, was glaring at the virtual image of Zatanna and Robin, the latter of whom was trying to pacify the former.

In Batman's eyes, that was a problem. A big, identity revealing, heart-breaking, Robin threatening problem that he just couldn't allow.

"I'm going to get someone in there to help mediate the situation."

"And how do you plan on doing that? Supes here won't let anyone leave."

Batman ignored Flash's question, instead throwing down a smoke bomb.

Which of course, was somehow laced with some mysterious lead-like agent that prevented Superman from seeing anything with his x-ray vision.

When the smoke cleared, he was gone, leaving a bunch of annoyed heroes and one confused reporter.

"How the-"

"Don't ask."

* * *

_I. Don't. Believe. This._

Artemis was staring at her normal get up. Leather jacket. Jeans Shirt.

It was what was written on her shirt, right where her chest would go, because there was just no other place for that to be, that made her blood boil.

* * *

"Truth or Dare Zatanna?" asked M'gaan.

"Truth. I'm sick of everyone choosing dares." replied the magician, glaring pointedly at Robin, who was now rightfully ashamed.

"Well, ah, who was your first kiss?"

Robin smiled inwards at this.

_Obviously, me._

"A guy from my school."

Smile gone.

"Oh yeah. He was this real cute _blonde_. And he was nice too. Always opening doors for me and stuff. And helping out with just about everything. Not to mention his lips tasted like blueberries."

Robin was using every inch of his Batman instilled will to stop from scowling, but it didn't stop him from asking: "This guy have a name?"

Zatanna smirked cruelly at him, before replying.

"No luck, Boy Wonder. I don't want any _accidents_ happening to anyone. Or any unwanted background checks."

Robin's cheeks flushed.

"That was _one_ time. And it was worth it, because that guy went to juvee!"

"So you had to break his arm?"

"That was an honest accident. I was only trying to sprain it."

"I can take care of my-_wow_."

"Woah." uttered Wally, completely breathless as Artemis entered the room.

"Shut. Up."

"I think he's already shutting up, Artemis." taunted Roy.

"I was talking to you, Roy." retorted Artemis, taking her position on Wally's lap.

The speedster was currently too discombobulated to put two coherent thoughts together.

"I knew you guys were close, but not _that_ close." snickered Robin, commenting on the sign on Artemis's shirt.

"And you know the funny part? I bought that for her days ago. I didn't even know that they were actually going to get married. I guess that's just a _sign_, isn't it?" punned Roy.

_MRS. KID FLASH, ROPERTY OF KID FLASH_

* * *

"That's a little overkill, don't you think Roy?" muttered Black Canary, making a mental note to just let Roy buy his arrows the next time they went shopping. That is, assuming she could trick him into going to the mall with Artemis again.

"Great. Juuuust great."

"Chillax GA. It's just a little harmless teenage fun. Certainly no worse than what _you_ do when you think no one's looking. Or when Black Canary is around." joked Flash.

* * *

Kaldur just didn't get it. It made no sense really. No normal human beings would be so obsessed with turning a harmless time passing game into a hostile, innuendo filled, relationship straining pit of acid.

_I must never allow my fellow Atlanteans to experience this horror._ _Banning this game would be acting in their best interests._

Kaldur's thought's were interrupted by yet another spinning of the bottle.

_Ah, the accursed bottle. It litters the sea, and now it litters the consciousness of my teammates._

He found himself hosting Connor.

"Truth or D-"

"Dare." replied Connor, not even bothering to wait for Kaldur to finish.

_Interruptions are rude. Rudeness must be punished._

And with that, Kaldur pulled out an evil plan.

"Robin, may you please provide us with the audio for the theme to '_Life in a Barbie Dreamhouse?'_"

"Sure thing Kaldur." said Robin, whipping out his PDA.

"Does anyone have a pink tutu for Connor?"

"I do!" exclaimed M'gaan, telepathically reassembling the shredded pink tutu from Robin's previous dare and enlarging it to fit on Connor, who found himself engulfed by it.

"Connor, you will be singing and dancing to the tune of this song." stated Kaldur, as if it were an ordinary order.

_Life in the Barbie dream house..._

...

Surprisingly enough, Connor danced to the tune with perfection, and actually managed a pretty good mimicry of the singer.

Life without a capacity to feel much embarrassment certainly had it's perks.

Of course, everyone was summarily creeped out as Connor twirled once more in perfect ballerina form, _after_ the song finished, and said "La la la la!" in a rather high pitched voice.

He then ripped off the tutu and sat down, as if nothing happened.

Silence.

"Ah-well, that was something else." said Wally, finally regaining his ability to took.

Of course, now his nose was being attacked by the scent of a certain archer's hair, but it was a small sacrifice really. Anything for team-bonding.

"Interesting."

At that, everyone turned around to see the foreign voice.

It was Batman. _Again._

"Uh, Bats. What brings you here? Mission?" asked Robin.

"No, I actually brought someone. A future teammate of yours I decided to initiate into the team today. You've already worked with her before, so there shouldn't be much of a problem."

And with that Batman turned around, cape swirling behind him, and left for the Zeta Tubes.

He left, in his spot, a smirking, dark-sunglass wearing, ponytailed, red-head.

Robin gulped, loudly, and cursed the world under his breath.

"Hey! It's Batgirl!" exclaimed Wally.

"Why yes it is." said Roy, a huge grin on his face.

* * *

**I would apologize, but let's face it. We love messing with Robin. And Wally. And Artemis. And Roy. And we jut can't live without watching Connor do absurd things without being embarrassed, and watching Kaldur feel uncomfortable, and watching M'gaan naively own everyone in Truth or Dare.**

**Read. Review. Pray for Robin. He's going to need it. And no, the Batclan's identities will not be revealed...unless I change my mind.**


	19. Chapter 19

**Babs is here...heh heh heh. And of course, we love playing with Zatanna's heartstrings. Because frankly, who better to mess with than one of the few people who can mess with Robin?**

**Disclaimer:**

**Damien Wayne: Because the author's head has exploded, I have travelled back into the past to avoid a major copyright scandal by stating that this author does not own Young Justice.**

* * *

**July 10, 1:15 P.M, Mount Justice**

"So, you're the ever so elusive Batgirl?" asked Artemis.

Something about the aura of girl was vaguely familiar, but then again, as of late Artemis had felt the same when she was around Robin.

_Must be a batclan thing._

It's wonderful really, what a slight change in voice tones, some sunglasses, a different walking posture, and a different hairstyle could do for a person's appearance.

"Yep, that's me." said Batgirl, taking a spot on the couch next to Robin. Which, incidentally, placed her directly between Robin and Zatanna, in more ways that one.

"So, what's going on here?"

"We're playing truth or dare." replied Connor, as if that should answer why he had just been in a tutu, or the dark brown stains all over the couch Roy was on, or the giant yellow words on Artemis's shirt. Or why there was a gigantic slumbering snow white wolf-like creature taking a nap in the corner of the room.

"Riiight." replied Batgirl, interrupted by a yawn.

"Sorry, I didn't get much sleep last night. A certain Boy Blunder got me in trouble, and kept us stuck cleaning up the explosive mess his experiment made in the Batcave until one A.M in the morning."

Robin looked somewhere between sheepish and mortified at this comment. He had left his move marathon with Zatanna last night because of that mess.

"And don't even get me started on how long it took us to clean the gunk out our hair. I mean-"

"Ahem, BG, that's another convo for later. Besides, _you_ didn't follow my instructions on how to maintain the stability. Now, if we could just continue with the game." interrupted Robin.

Kaldur was already on it, dutifully spinning the bottle.

* * *

"Sometimes I wonder what goes on in the Bat's head." murmured Lois

"You, and just about everybody else." replied Flash

"I don't see how Batgirl is supposed to 'mediate' anything. All she seems to be doing is unknowingly driving a wedge bet-_ohhh._" said Black Canary, realization hitting her like 10-ton train.

"Ohhh what?" asked Green Arrow, not seeing where her train of thought went.

Canary didn't even get to open her mouth before another smoke bomb exploded.

As the smoke cleared, the steely structure of Batman could be seen, taking up it's space at the screen controls.

_"How did you even get a smoke bomb in here?"_

Like 99% of questions directed his way, he ignored it.

* * *

"Must be beginner's misfortune. Truth or Dare Batgirl?" asked Roy, clearly enjoying himself.

"Truth." answered Batgirl, still cautious around Roy, who seemed to have a problem finding the line between 'game-appropriate' and 'lawful incentive for murder.'

"If you had to be trapped in an inescapable vault, tied up face to face with a guy, with impending death, who would you want to be tied up with?"

"Robin. Because I _have_ been trapped tied up face to face to face with him, in an inescapable vault with impeding death looming overhead, multiple times." answered Batgirl, smirking at Robin, who was deliberately avoiding her gaze.

"Did you ever do it for fun?" pressed Roy

_Many times._

"Since I've already answered one question, I am not going to answer that one. However, I will say that I cannot deny nor confirm your theory. But, it's good to see that Roy and Robin are _still_ unable to play a game of Truth or Dare without creating some sort of scandal. At least this time you didn't involve a foreign Ambassador's kids." replied Batgirl, taking a page from her father's book on how to dodge press question.

"What? Ambassador's kids?" asked Wally, interest piqued.

"Nothing." replied Roy and Robin together, as Roy sent the bottle rolling around again.

* * *

"You are some kind of paranoid Bats. Or just plain Batty...unless being plain Batty means you're also paranoid." rambled Flash

"What he means is, we don't see why you brought in Batgirl. How can she 'mediate' anything?" interjected Green Arrow.

"Isn't it obvious?" said Lois and Black Canary at the same time.

"You first." offered the reporter.

"He's driving a wedge between Robin and Zatanna. Because he's getting overprotective and doesn't want his adoptive son getting hurt." stated Black Canary, a smile tugging on her lips.

"Isn't it just so adorable?" cooed Lois, only half-mocking the Dark Knight.

Green Arrow looked at Flash, who looked at Superman, who just shook his head as if to warn the others from getting involved.

* * *

_The World. Hates. Me. And I didn't even get a ring, or a proper wedding. Or even a proper kiss._

_Mmm, I must find that shampoo. Her hair just smells sooo-wait. Wait. Focus._

Such thoughts ran through Artemis and Wally's heads as they found themselves on the business end of the bottle.

Hosting them was M'gaan.

"Truth or Dare?" she asked cheerily.

"Dare". replied Wally, right as Artemis answered "Truth."

M'gaan blinked.

"Tru-"

"-Dare." asserted Wally.

"Unless of course, you're too chicken." he replied, throwing her own words in her face.

It's not like he wanted to be stuck doing some embarrassing couple-like dare with her. It was just that he needed to experiment with the science begind married life, and since Uncle Barry refused, he was going to have to work with this. That was the only reason. To even suggest a hidden, hormone driven agenda was blasphemy.

"I dare you to act like a married couple for the rest of the game. It would be just so adorable! You have to call each other honey and dear, and even snuggle!" exclaimed the Martian, bursting with happiness.

Batgirl was clearly amused at the scene, taking in the Martian's overflowing emotions and Wally and Artemis's looks of shock and _is that joy I see in Wally's eyes?_

_This warrants further investigation._

"Ow! That hurts, _honey._"

"Just trying to snuggle, dearest _wife_ of mine."

"Somebody get me a barf bag."

Batgirl elbowed Robin, giggling.

Zatanna couldn't help the small glare that escaped her.

* * *

"I'm just saying, from a moral standpoint, what we are doing is wrong. Spying on our protégés, violating their trust, sending in other protégés to intervene in trivial matters. Are we losing our minds?"

For one, everyone looked sheepish. Aside from Batman, who refused to turn around to look at Black Canary, and Lois, who was the only one here who had a legitimate excuse. Her Kryptonian fiancée has quite literally grabbed her, flown her in here, and then welded the only exit shut.

And then someone tried to open the door from the other side.

"Hey, what the -Who is in here?" asked a muffled voice.

"Hal?" asked Flash.

"Flash? Wha-,never mind. Just open this door. There's a big problem, and with a lot of the leaguers currently swamped, we need all available hands on deck. Do you know where I can find Superman, Black Canary, Batman, and Green Arrow?"

His reply was Superman ripping open the door, revealing all the requested heroes, plus Lois Lane, in the room.

"Don't ask. Just get Lois to my quarters and meet us at the Zeta Tubes." ordered the Man of Steel.

"Hey Hal! Long time no see!"

"Hah! Lois! I heard you gave John a good brow beating in the mess hall!" said Hal, smiling as he flew off with Lois in a bubble.

"You bet. Which reminds me, what have you heard from Kyle? I heard you were both on Oa."

Obviously the Lois had too many contacts on the league.

Flash just glared at Superman, as if to say _Really?_

"What? She knows how to worm her way into the superhero community! She even knows Batman's identity!" protested Superman.

"Sure." said Flash, zipping out of the room.

As the superhero's left, only Batman remained, holding a flash drive that had the only recording to the all the morning's events at Mount Justice in one hand, and the remote access device to the Mount's security cameras.

Grudgingly, he threw both on the ground, smashed them thoroughly, and then dropped some acidic liquid on them, dissolving the remains. The situation was out of his hands, for now.

It's not like he couldn't just hack the cameras from the Batcomputer later, if required.

* * *

**Yay! More spitfire faux wedding fluff. And BABS! I haven't decide whether to make a love triangle or not. Maybe a faux love triangle orchestrated by BABS! Plus the mentors have finally got their nosy noses out of the team's business...And Lois knows people.**

**I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Now dig deep into the darkest, cruelest confines of your souls, and bring forth cruel punishments for our heroes. Then take those punishments and put them in your review. ;)**


	20. Chapter 20

**Credit to Zatanna Carrille and RollingUpHigh as I used their truths and dares in this chapter, although I slightly altered the sushi one. Certainly better than what I could come up with. Thank you my evil muses! And have no fear tardis-blue-jay, you're dare options will not be forgotten in the next chapter.**

**Kaldur: This author does not own Young Justice.**

**Me: Get back in your spot. It's bad manners to interrupt someone, especially in the middle of an author's note.**

**Kaldur: But-**

**Me: BACK. Or I will END you.**

* * *

**July 10, 1:30 P.M, Mount Justice**

_Finally, my turn to have some fun._

"M'gann, truth or dare?" asked Batgirl

"Dare!" said M'gann, with her usual cheeriness.

"Wow, You seem kind of eager."

"Dare is always the most interesting option!"

"Well, I dare you to eat a hundred Oreos. I'm sure Kid Metabolism here should have more than enough."

"What's with all the cookie abuse today?" grumbled Wally

"Oreos? Hmm, I haven't been able to taste those manufactured sweets. For some reason, Uncle J'onn doesn't like to share his, and confiscates any I manage to get my hands on." mused M'gann as she went off to the kitchen to look for some Oreos.

"Are you sure it's even safe to give her so many? I mean, Martian's may be prone to getting addicted to that stuff." worried Wally, more about his cookies than M'gann

"I have no idea, but I guess we'll just have to find out, won't we?" said Batgirl, rather mischievously, as reached to spin the bottle again.

"Oh god..."

"Shut up Wally, you're just worried about your dumb cookies, honey." snapped Artemis, silencing the speedster.

* * *

_Wally usually hides his sweets in here...oh, Hello Megan! _though M'gann to her self as she telepathically moved the fridge to reveal a hole in the wall behind it. Inside the hole, which just so happened to connect to one of the cave's many extensive hidden passagway's, was a rather large stash of sweets. Sitting atop of the stash were three Oreo containers.

_Time to see what it is that makes Uncle J'onn act so...weird._

She telepathically opened a container and brought a cookie to her hand, and put it in her mouth. And then she bit down.

Her eyes went wide in shock.

* * *

"Truth? Dare? Same old, same old, Kaldur." asked Roy, somewhat bored.

Now, physically speaking, it should have been impossible for the bottle to land and make Roy or Kaldur host each other. But a certain speedster and a certain archer had been 'whisper' fighting about something and then said archer accidently kicked the bottle as it was spinning, sending it in-between Roy and Kaldur. So there they were.

"Dare." replied the Atlantean, more out of a dangerous curiosity than out of an actual desire to be dared.

"Your mistake, Kaldur." smirked Roy, pulling a small bag of snacks, ripping it out open, and tossing it to Kaldur.

"You need to eat those."

Kaldur picked up the bag, and took out one of the snacks, and then froze.

_No...NO! How could this happen?!_

He was looking at a fish cracker, his face contorted into an expression of pure fear.

...

"Well, get on with it."

"I-I, I can't...They belong in the sea."

"They aren't real Kaldur." comforted Zatanna.

"I would be betraying my principles, and my King."

"They're just crackers." deadpanned Wally.

"They could have been fish in another life."

"They were just a bunch of chemicals in another life." said Roy

"What? chemicals? What torture did these beings endure?" asked Kaldur, frantically and wide-eyed.

"Kaldur, are you ok?" asked Artemis, genuine concern in her voice.

It seemed M'gaan wasn't the only one understanding certain concepts of the surface world...

* * *

_I MUST FIND MORE!_

M'gann stood in the entrance to the hidden passageway, all three containers of Oreo cookies empty, and the whole sweet stash dispersed all over the floor as the result of her mad search for more.

With oreo crumbs smudging her mouth, and a crazed look in her eyes, she seemed feral as she contemplated her next move. Then it came to her.

_WALLY!_

* * *

Wally actually yelped at the loud sound in his brain, causing the others to look at him funnily.

_M'gann? We're inside, you don't have to-_

_WHERE ARE THEY?_

_What?_

_THE COOKIES! WHERE ARE THE OREO COOKIES?_

_M'gann, please, my brain-_

And then M'gann flew in, telepathically removed Artemis from Wally's lap, and grabbed the speedster's shirt.

"Where are they?! I _need _MORE!" she shouted into his face, stunning even the shell-shocked Kaldur.

"Wha-ok! OK! My room! Closet, behind the wardrobe! Those are the only ones I have left!" he confessed.

M'gann immediately dropped him, and then dropped Artemis on top of his lap, before flying off to find her precious cookies.

"Oh boy...not again." said Robin, a horrified expression on his face.

"Whadda you mean, again?" asked the miffed speedster.

"This sounds just like Batman's description of the Martian Manhunter's first encounter with Oreos." he answered, still looking horrified.

"Should we do something?" asked Zatanna.

"_No!_" replied Batgirl and Robin, in unison.

"I think we should. M'gann is our friend, remember?" expressed Kaldur, while slowly trying to move the bag of fish-crackers out of sight.

"Sure. _After_ you eat the crackers, like I dared you to."

"But Roy, I have already expressed my deep inability to do so. Asking this of me would be like asking you to shun arrows in favor of firearms."

"It's nothing like that!"

"Indeed it is."

"No it isn't."

"I beg to differ."

"Just shut up and eat the crackers!"

"I cannot comply."

Finally, Zatanna intervened.

"You guys can keep arguing like children forever, _or_, you could come to an agreement. Say, Kaldur doesn't do this dare, but Roy get's him to have to do one of his dares later?"

Roy immediately brightened up at the prospect, and Kaldur looked relieved to have found a way out of eating the crackers.

"Sure."

"I agree to those terms. But first, I must do something."

With that, Kaldur got up, taking the bag of crackers with him, and headed for the exit, prompting the rest of the team to follow.

They watched from the exit of the Mount as Kaldur waded into the water, and then emptied the snacks into the ocean.

"Return home, poor souls." he said, solemnly.

...

"He does know that not only are those just artificial foods...but he also just littered the ocean?" asked Wally.

"You want to tell him, husband dearest?"

* * *

M'gann was about to open the 6th box of Oreos she had today, before she stopped herself.

_What am I doing_.

This temporary relapse into sanity was quickly ended by the return of her insatiable urge for Oreos. There were still a good half a dozen boxes to go.

_I must thank Wally for stocking up on Oreos. And then demand he tell me the name of his supplier._

* * *

The team returned to their seats, with Robin already grabbing and spinning the bottle.

"Truth-"

"-or Dare, Batgirl?" asked Artemis and Wally.

"Oh look, they've been married so long they're even finishing their sentences." cooed Batgirl in a mocking voice, just for the purpose of riling Wally up.

"Not a smart move. My wife here is a real spitfire." retorted Wally.

"Getting territorial Wally? You must be attached. I choose truth." replied Batgirl, both taunting Wally and severing her friend's hope at punishing him.

"So, what are your feelings towards Robin?"

She had not factored in Artemis.

"Well, what are your feelings towards Robin?"

Batgirl, hesitated for one fatal second, before answering.

"He's my friend. Best _platonic_ friend." she answered, with an emphasis on platonic.

Robin felt as if a noose had been lifted from around his neck, and just a small tinge of hurt, although he quickly buried it, and Zatanna suddenly felt most of her negative feelings towards Batgirl dissipate. _Most._ She had hesitated, after all.

"That's not a real answer! You didn't describe your feelings." complained Wally

"Your wife should've asked a better question. Or gotten married to a smarter husband."

"Alright, no insulting my husband. He isn't the brightest light, but he's mine, unfortunately." intervened Artemis.

Wally just pouted as his 'wife' spun the bottle.

* * *

M'gann was now learning, just as her uncle had, why a Martian should never devour large quantities of Oreos without ever having come into contact with them before.

_Ohhh..._

She lay on the floor, surrounded by cartons of Oreos, nearly immobilized from a mixture of stomach cramps, a headache, and a dry throat, all classic symptoms of Martian Oreo withdrawal.

* * *

"This is either a statistical phenomenon, or rigged." muttered Batgirl as she found herself on the business end of the bottle, for the second time in a row.

"Are you accusing us of rigging this game?" asked Connor, dead serious.

"No. But I wouldn't put it past Robin, Roy, or _Wallace_ here." replied Batgirl, purposefully using Wally's full name to annoy him.

"Me? I'm as clean as a whistle. Now, Truth or Dare?" asked Roy.

"A whistle that has been sledged through Wally's room. And Truth, Mr. Psychopath."

"Truth? Very well then. Who was your first kiss?" asked Roy.

Once again, Robin felt like his head was on a chopping block, his mind going back to a very boring Wayne Foundation Ball that had a very interesting end.

Batgirl grinned from ear to ear, as if she was about to reveal a big secret.

"Wally."

* * *

**Even I didn't see that coming...and I wrote it. Oh the things Babs has done...**


	21. Chapter 21

**I remember when I though this was going to end at Chapter 10...Here we are at Chapter 21. Credit to tardis-blue-jay for the Speedy hat dare.**

**Me: I do not own Young Justice.**

**Me 2: Yes, I do.**

**Me: Noo...you, we, I, arhg! None of us do!.**

**Me 2: Yeah I do.**

**Me 3: Hey, who the hell made clones of us?!**

**Robin: *Cackle***

**Me 4: GET HIM!**

* * *

**July 10, 1:45 P.M, Mount Justice**

The silence was deafening, as everyone seemed shocked and confused, even Connor. Only Batgirl seemed unaffected by the announcement. In fact, she even seemed a little smug, holding in a fit of giggles, but not because she had locked lips with Wally, but rather because she had managed to already shock and awe the entire team, within an hour of being a part of it.

Wally, in his defense, had the decency to look ashamed, and mortified at the same time.

"It, it wasn't like that! She-I, it-I mean, it was for a mission!" sputtered Wally.

"Of course you would kiss a girl under the guise of a missions. It's a miracle you haven't cheated on me yet." snarled Artemis, letting out more anger and jeal-_no, I am not jealous-_ousy than she intended to.

"I swear, it's the truth!"

"Hey, have some mercy on him. It's the truth, but I'm not saying anything else." said Batgirl in between a fit of laughter.

Robin glared at her, and even behind the sunglasses, Batgirl could still see the detail-demanding meaning behind it. Being Batgirl, she just ignored it and spun for the bottle, still grinning at Wally's 'marital issues'.

Suddenly, M'gann entered the room in her green form, looking a little paler than normal, and prompting a serious look of concern from Connor.

"M'gann, are you ok?" he asked worriedly, getting up to help her down.

"Not really, something in the Oreos..." she groaned.

"She must've eaten too many too quickly. Just like her uncle, when he first encountered Oreos. She just needs to lay down and wear it out. It should be gone in half an hour or so. Until then, she should probably sit out the game." stated Robin helpfully.

Connor complied, sweetly fluffing the couch cushions and making sure M'gann was comfortable.

"Truth or Dare, Roy?" asked Connor, turning around to find the end of the bottle pointed at him.

"I'll do a truth today." replied Roy

"I overheard, using my super hearing, you and Robin conversing about some party in Maui. What exactly happened in that party?"

"Well..." began Roy, thinking back on that week of craziness

* * *

**6 Months Ago**

_Sirens and bright lights flashed through the night._

_A red 70s sports car sped down a freeway in Maui in the middle of the night at approximately 90 mph, followed by two police cruisers._

_"I told ya to pull over!" roared a 13 year old wearing funky sunglasses, a fake mustache, a 70s jacket, and an afro, while speaking in an obviously fake Jersey accent._

_"Shaddup ya cook! I'm drivin' here!" yelled the driver, a 17 year old boy, red hair slicked back, snazzy suit on, and flashy sunglasses resting on his forehead. He was trying to_

_"We shoulda' stayed at the party! And why do you numbskulls have sunglasses on? It's the middle of the bleeding night!" exclaimed the 15 year old redhead from the backseat, multiple rings adorning his fingers and his hair sticking out every which way, wearing an even crazier Disco suit than the driver._

_"Why aren't you wearin' one ya cook?"_

_"Shuddup at the mouthin', and quit calling me a cook Dick, you dick!"_

_"Wally, Dick, WOULD YOU BOTH SHUDDUP?!" roared the driver as he suddenly swerved the mustang into a U-turn, heading straight in between the two police cruisers at an alarming speed._

_"I don't wanna die!" wailed Wally._

_"Shut up and die like a man!" screamed Dick_

_"If I hear another peep from you sugar pumped broads, I'll make sure you end up like roadkill!" yelled Roy as drove past the police cars, only avoiding each of them by inches._

* * *

"...it's more like _parties. _I basically spent a week trashing Ollie's mansion in an aweseome series of parties with both Wally and Robin. And his yacht. And his golf that doesn't even mention what we did outside of the parties. Of course, it was a _huge_ mess to clean up, but it was sooo worth it. The things you can do when there's fifty other kids to keep attention off of you." boasted Roy.

It was always fun boasting about his extravagant, over the top adventures in chaos on Ollie's various properties, but there was no way he was going to talk about what happened _off_ the properties...because that was when things just got weird.

Artemis raised her eyebrow at her 'Arrow-brother' as Connor spun the bottle. She had later plans to worm her way into one of these "parties" later, especially now that she was aware of their existence. The boys were pretty thorough about clean-ups...except for that one time when Black Canary and Green Arrow discovered an upside down 17-foot wide pizza in the living room.

_All those boy 'sleepovers', random odd items popping up, that Jamaican 'tourist' we found asleep behind the couch that one time in Miami..._

Her thoughts were interrupted by the feeling of someone absentmindedly twirling their fingers through her hair.

_Mmm...Wait. NO. I'm still mad at him._

Her sweet but conflicted thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Zatanna asking her and her 'husband', a question Artemis had come to hate.

"Truth or Dare?"

* * *

**2 Updates in 1 Day = Short 2nd Update. Sorry guys. And thumbs up for Roy, Wally, and Dick pretending to be in the 70s while doing absurd shenanigans in Hawaii! Now, you guys(expertly deflects blame) have made M'gann, the only cheery person in this fic, a Oreo-addicted Martian unable to even play the game as she endures withdrawal...I'm sure we(expertly takes credit) can do something worse to Artemis and Wally. ;)**


	22. Chapter 22

**For some blasted reason, if I update twice in a day fanfic doesn't recognize the second update, at least not on my end. Soo...I guess I'm not doing that again. Credit for the Zatanna hosts Spitfire dare goes to PrettyKityy Luvs U.**

**Disclaimer: *Insert Disclaimer***

***Sigh***

**I'm losing my touch.**

* * *

**July 10, 1:55 P.M, Mount Justice**

"Truth." replied Wally, just as Artemis answered "Dare."

"What is this, the 3rd time you guys have done this?" asked Zatanna playfully.

"Yes, and last I checked, it's _my_ turn to choose what we do." replied Artemis, pointedly.

"So, this is a democracy now?"

"If you had your way, this would be an orgy."

"How is that even relevant to anything?"

"Ah, but you don't deny it?"

"Wha-no. Just, argh! Do you have to turn everything into some argument?"

"I didn't start it."

"Yes, you did."

"No, you did."

"No, you-"

"Enough!" exclaimed Batgirl.

"Aren't you two supposed to be acting like a couple?"

"They are Kaldur. Like an old married couple in dire need of a divorce."

"Stay out of this Roy."

"Make me Arty."

"Really? Arty?"

"Says the girl who uses her real name as her superhero name."

"Is that so, _Red Arrow? _I mean, how much time did you spend thinking of that?"

"Is everyone done fighting yet?" half-yelled Zatanna.

"Don't ask them that. It gives them the option to keep fighting." murmured Connor.

"We're doing a Dare, and that's final."

"I guess we know who has the pants in this marriage." whispered Batgirl to Robin.

"Hey, I heard that!" grumbled Wally

"Since you two obviously need some along time, either to make out or kill each other, I've decided that your dare will be for Artemis to shove a whole bag of ice down Wally's pant's. And no, he can't change or put on another pair of pants or any of those loopholes."

Zatanna paused to utter a spell, before continuing, paying no heed to the looks on Artemis and Wally's face.

"Ok, there should be a large bag of ice in the kitchen now. You might want to get this over with quickly."

* * *

"Quit being a baby!"

"I'm not being a baby, you're just manhandling me!"

"Well, maybe if you would grow a spine and be a man, I wouldn't have to manhandle you. Now let me shove this ice down your stupid pants!"

"Argh, your hands are cold!"

"No, you just have really sensitive skin."

"He-e-EY! Keep those hands north of there!"

"Just shut up Kid Mouth, I'm trying to stop the ice from falling into your underwear. You can't deny you like the thoughts going through your head."

"Are you trying to seduce me while shoving ice down my pa-ay-ay-nts. That stuff is cold!"

"Please, Wally. You were already seduced when I had on the Kid Flash bikini. I bet you're still imagining me in it."

...

"That's what I thought. Now quit fidgeting."

"But it's s-ahh, cooold!"

"How did I get married to such a coward?"

"How did I get married to such an abusive woman?"

"Don't know, but-wait a...oh, my, god."

Wally panicked as Artemis froze with two handfuls of ice currently lodged in his pants.

"Ah, Artemis?"

"Wally...I can't believe this."

"What? What?"

"...You have...Artemis boxers."

* * *

"Weeell, they are one truly dysfunctional married couple." stated Batgirl as she watched the bottle spin with one eye and Zatanna with the other. Something about the magician was a little off, and it just bugged Batgirl to no end, for some inexplicable reason.

_Best if I stay right here, in between her and Robin. God knows that boy has nearly as many problems with girls as Wally. Except instead of flirting with each one, he ends up avoiding them while they run to him like bees. The snobby little brats. I wonder if Zatanna is like that? She seems laid back...but then again, so do many 'problem' girls...further investigation is required. For Robin's safety of course._

"Batgirl? _Batgirl?_" asked Roy, snapping her out of her thoughts.

"What?"

"Truth or Dare?"

"Truth you red haired baboon-like, ginger imbecile." she replied

"Hey, you're a ginger too. We shouldn't insult one another."

"I'm a redhead. You're an air-head."

"_I'm_ the airhead? Last I checked, you're the one in love with flying. Or were you just interested in the male tour guides?"

"Hey, I don't let the opposite sex treat me like a little plaything in a game of cat and mouse while darting from skyscraper to skyscraper."

"I have no idea what you are referring to, but if I did, I wouldn't dignify it with a response."

"Pfft. Only people who don't have a response use that."

...

As the argument continued on, Zatanna mouthed to Robin _"What is happening?"_

Robin just mouthed back _"Better not to interrupt them. They get competitive."_

* * *

"I swear, my mother made we wear it as a punishment!"

"Your _mother_ made you wear underpants, with _my face_ on them, as a punishment? And how exactly would she see this as a fit punishment? Furthermore, how exactly would she know anything about me?"

"Well, I may mention you in passing, but that's not important. She has these motherly senses that make her aware of the worst punishments."

"Riiight. So, if that's the case, why are you wearing them today? You've been ranting on and on for the last two weeks about how your parents were on a anniversary cruise ship vacation for like a month, and you got to stay with your Uncle Barry and Aunt Iris."

Artemis, arms crossed, raised her eyebrow at Wally as he found himself at a loss for a proper explanation.

"-ah, I, they, I mean, argh. God I hate my life."

...

"So, should I disturbed or flattered?"

* * *

"That was a rather colorful conversation." mused Kaldur.

"It wasn't a conversation. It was me wiping the floor with Roy's ugly face, just like I did in Maui."

"You were only in Maui for one day, and that was part of a game. Which we lost because of you."

"Oh for Batman's sake, don't start this again!" intervened Robin.

"Then spin the damn bottle Pixie Boots!"

"It's already been spun. And I told you, never to call me that." replied the Boy Wonder, whispering the last part.

"I'm sorry, I can't hear you. Could you speak louder, _Pixie Boots?_"

"What's a Pixie Boots?" asked Zatanna confused.

"Oh that's a hilarious story."

"One that we won't be telling, today, tomorrow, or any other day, _period_."

"That's not for you to decide, _shortstuff_." continued Batgirl.

Robin turned to glare at Roy.

"See what you've done!? You woke up her inner devil."

"Oh, you mean the one that comes built-in with gingers worldwide?" replied Roy, grinning.

"Oh for the love of-"

"Hey Roy, remember when Robin here was just a little boy? I remember you mentioning a lisp or something. It was before I became Batgirl."

"Oh, he was just so adorable. He couldn't pronounce his R's, so my name was Woy. _Woy! _And he used to say stuff like this: '_Woy! What awe those?'_ I wish I had recorded him when he was still little." snickered Roy

"Really? He couldn't pronounce his R's?" asked Zatanna, a smile on her lips.

"Oh man, that was just the beginning of it. For one week when he was 12, after an encounter with scarecrow, he had a pathological fear of the color pink." added Batgirl, grinning.

"Is nothing private or sacred anymore?" growled Robin

"Not when you tell it to us gingers." replied Roy, as if it were a fact.

...

"Do you think we'll ever be able to move forward with the game?" asked M'gaan, feeling somewhat better as the effects of her 'Oreo high' started to wear off.

"I doubt it." replied Connor.

* * *

**You know how this works. Time to ask BG a juicy question. And I may be planning to bring Roy down a notch...or ten...thousand. R&R, because I'm too lazy to say Read and Review, which would have been way shorter than this whole sentence. And who want's more Roy/Wally/Robin flashback scenes, with a little Batgirl tossed in there? I know I am.**


	23. Chapter 23

** tardis-blue-jay, apologies for the confusion. I had written in the dare, and then wrote it out for the Roy/Wally/Dick party scene. And then I forgot to put it back in. It's in this chapter though. I double checked. :D**

**^See? I do read people's reviews...or at least my fictional secretary does. Speaking of which, Amanda! Where's my Anti-Gaffe Coffee?**

**Amanda: It's coming sir!**

**Me: How many times must I say, call me sire, not sir!**

**Amanda: Yes sir, sire.**

**Me: *Sigh***

**Disclaimer: Boo. I do not own YJ. Baah.**

* * *

**July 10, 2:10 P.M, Mount Justice**

Much to Robin's chagrin, and Roy and Batgirl's immense delight, the ginger-devils had refused to go back to which ever evil pit in the souls of the two redheads they emerged from.

"You think that was bad? You should've seen the time he tried to skip school for a month so he could work on his gymnastics more. The chewing he got in the Batcave was a cross between terrifying and hilarious."

"You didn't have to babysit him _and_ Kid Flash. I swear, the number of times those idiots nearly blew themselves up, it's a miracle they can even walk today."

"Stop. Just stop ok? I am so not traught. Roy, ask her a truth already."

"Whatever you want _Wobbin_." replied Roy mockingly.

* * *

"You have soft hands."

...

For the second time in a row, Artemis found herself frozen in place with two hands of ice in a certain speedsters pant's. She sighed.

"You're not going to make this easy are you Baywatch?"

"I try not to. Now finish with the ice. I've already melted half of what you've already put it in." pouted the embarrassed speedster

"Half? I nearly put in the entire bag! What is your body temperature?"

"It's higher than normal, because of my super speed. And when you get your hands out of my pants, I can vibrate and melt the rest in a minute or so."

"Wait, you can vibrate?" asked Artemis, eyebrow raised.

"Yup."

"Like, _vibrate_ vibrate?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Tell me, can you vibrate only certain parts of your body?"

"Actually, I can. So far I've got my hands and feet down, and I'm working on my other limbs but,-"

He stopped speaking as he heard something he was sure was scientifically impossible. _Giggling._

He turned around at supersonic speed, quite literally, and his eyes confirmed what his hears had heard.

Artemis was leaned over, clutching the countertop for support, and _giggling._

* * *

"Have you ever kissed Robin. On the lips?" asked Roy, already knowing the answer.

Robin shifted uncomfortably.

"Yes."

"How many times?" asked, or rather, demanded Zatanna, her eyes like lasers on the present members of the Bat-family.

"Only one question, and it was already used up. But we're _not_ in a relationship, Roy. Besides, you of all people should know all about hidden, scandalous relationships, don't you?"

Roy stiffened, his smug grin turning into a scowl as he glared at a rather too composed Batgirl. She stared him down from behind her sunglasses. After a few moments, Roy looked away in defeat.

"For someone so young, you are already getting quite a reputation. Is Batman a playboy?" asked Connor.

"Connor!" scolded M'gann.

"Does Batman look, act, or even smell like a playboy?" asked Robin.

_It's not lying if you're not denying._

"It's always the tall, dark ones that get the ladies." teased Roy, knowing full well what Batman's alter ego had a reputation for.

"You should learn to respect authority Roy." said Robin, a sly grin returning to his face.

"Or what?"

"l might just have to educate you. Truth or Dare?"

That was when Roy looked down at the bottle, and realized he was being hosted by Robin.

_Holy pudding._

* * *

"It's not funny."

"Funny? Its hi-la-rious." said Artemis, still giggling uncontrollably, and making Wally nervous.

He'd just figured out what was so funny when she whisper-yelled "You're a living vibrator" in between giggles. Any other girl and he would have been flirting into the sunset, but Artemis laughing about an innuendo set him of balance and made him feel awkward. Like when she sat on his lap. Or he smelt her hair, or when they kissed, or when-

_Crap._

Wallace Rudolph West felt like he had just been run over by Central City traffic, thrown out of the Bat-jet without a parachute, and ran seventeen laps around the world as he felt reality descend upon him.

_Crap to infinity. I'm falling for my wife._

But as he stood there in front of his 'wife', soaking in his recent epiphany, he realized something else.

_Her giggles are cute._

And then Artemis stopped giggling, and almost started choking.

_Did I say that out loud?_

"Yeah, you did."

_Infinity and beyond..._

* * *

"Dare."

"Brave mistake Harper. Brave mistake. I dare you to wear your entire speedy costume. For the rest of the game, or until I deem fit for you to take it off."

"You forget the ace up my sleeve birdbrains." smirked Roy, as Kaldur realized what was happening.

"I call upon Kaldur'ahm to fufill a debt to a friend!" continued the archer in a dramatic court-room voice.

...

"I am surprised. This is tighter than it looks." commented the Atlantean, now currently wearing Roy's old speedy getup, sans the hat.

"That's what I tried to tell Oliver, but he just doesn't listen sometimes." concurred Roy.

"Don't forget the hat!" said Robin, coming up to Kaldur.

"It keeps falling off my head. I am unaware of how Roy was able to keep it on."

"Well I am. Bat-glue."

"Robin, I hardly think that will be necessa-"

_Glump_

"That should keep the old hat on for the next thirty minutes or so."

"Given that you are testing out Super Bat-glue instead of normal Bat-glue, it may be _or so_." mentioned Batgirl

"Super Bat-glue?" asked Kaldur questioningly.

"You have to ruin all the surprises, Batgirl?" asked Robin annoyingly.

"Yes, yes I do."

"What is super Bat-glue?" asked Kaldur, again.

"Something I tried once, and then swore to never again inflict upon myself. I feel sorry for you my friend. I never imagined this would happen." replied Roy, ominously, with a serious expression on his face.

"He's just exaggerating because he got a malfunctioning prototype."

"Exaggerating? My hat was stuck to my head for three days! Three days!"

"Can someone just spin the bottle?"

"What Zatanna said." stated Connor.

"I think I'll get back in the game as well. I'm feeling much better now!"

"Are you sure M'gann?" asked Connor

"Of course! But I still want Oreos. Lot's of them."

Connor gave her a look.

"Ok...only a little?"

* * *

"And that should be just about it." finished Artemis, gruffly, as she dumped the last of the ice down Wally's pant's a little too roughly

"Hey! Be gentle with the goods!" yelped Wally

"Just shut up, and get in the living room when you're done." she replied, her tone a little harsher than normal.

"What's gotten into you?"

She ignored his question as she walked away. Wally zoomed up to her and grabbed her arm, turning her around.

"If it's what I said, it was just a compli-"

"You don't know when to stop talking do you?" snarled Artemis, yanking her arm away and leaving a crestfallen speedster.

_Damn him, and his super-speed, and his hair, and his eyes, and his mouth, and his Artemis boxers, and his dumb stupid little comments._

* * *

"Hey, what happened to all the ice?" asked Zatanna as Wally and Artemis were back in their old position, on top of one another.

"Melted it by vibration." replied Wally sullenly.

"Ok..."

...

"I am starved. I don't know about you guys, but I haven't eaten anything since breakfast." stated Zatanna, filling the awkward silence.

A murmur of agreement came from the team members.

"Is there anything in the fridge?" asked Batgirl.

"With Wally having stayed here overnight? I doubt it." answered Connor

"Then we need to go shopping and get Pizza."

A few groans (Roy, Robin, Wally) came from the group.

"Who's going to go buy the stuff? And why do we have to go shopping? We can just order Pizza and wait for Red Tornado to restock the fridge." asked Roy pointedly.

"That's lazy talk."

"I'll pay for it, but I'm not going shopping."

"I'll go!" offered M'gann, automatically wondering if the store had Oreo cookies.

"You can't go by yourself M'gann. I'll come with." offered Connor

"Neither of you know earth customs very well. You'll need a guide, and I am unfit for the role, given my lack of experience in such everyday earth matters." stated Kaldur

"Then you should go with them. It would be a good learning experience." pointed out Roy

"True, but who will be our guide?"

Silence.

"Really?" asked Connor

"Hey, I'm paying, so I'm exempt from coming."

"I thought you were a Robin, not a chicken." teased Batgirl.

"Says the girl who slept with a nightlight until she was eleven." retorted Robin.

"You did the same."

"No! No more arguments!" interjected Zatanna, a hint of jealousy in her voice. Playful banter with _her_ Robin was not welcomed.

"Well...we could always use that nifty little bottle to decide..." said Batgirl, her eyes resting on it.

Connor spun it without even awaiting confirmation from the others.

"Great. Shopping." muttered the 'victim'.

"You should be fine Roy." snickered Robin.

* * *

**Kaldur, M'gann, Connor, and Roy are going shopping. Between the Atlantean Speedy, the Oreo addicted Martian, the easily angered half-kryptonian, and the ginger demon, this will not end well. It just can't****. But at least we can rest assured that Mount Justice, left to Batgirl, Zatanna, Robin, Artemis, and Wally, will remain perfectly safe and sound.**

**Aahh, who am I kidding?**


	24. Chapter 24

**Well that was anti-climatic. I had you all going for the daily updates, then I came up with an interesting twist, and then I didn't update. **

**I am terrible to my reviewers...speaking of which, 209 REVIEWS. THANKS YOU!**

**Now, here we are. Shopping Shenanigans. I decided to make one whole chapter to cover our favorite shopping group's adventures.**

**And roll the curtains.**

**AMANDA! ANTI-GAFFE COFFEE.**

* * *

**July 10, 2:30 P.M, Happy Shopper Groceries**

_Happy Shopper Groceries? What kind of a name is that? _thought Roy as he grabbed a cart.

They had only just entered the store, and they were already getting weird looks. The fact that one of them was in a speedy outfit and another was wearing a black, strapless gala dress didn't help.

_We really need to teach M'gann how to dress appropriately for different activities. But it doesn't look like Conner minds._

Indeed, Conner didn't mind, as he was ogling his girlfriend, who looked stunning in her address, at least in his opinion.

Kaldur was soaking in all the information he could, from the parking lot to the store carts, although he was uncomfortable in the Speedy suit, which was apparently not only tight, but hot. According to Roy, it was "Worth all the girls you can get with it". However, seeing as how four women had already given him weird looks that did not appear to insinuate that they were "hot for you", as Roy put it, he was seriously doubting the elder archer's statements.

"Alright, we've got Robin's Batman-given money and a long list, which I obviously failed to remember. What do we need?" asked Roy

When he got no answer, he turned around, and realized that only Kaldur remained with him.

"I believe M'ga-err, Megan, was the keeper of the list. But I shall do my best."

"Greeeaaat."

* * *

"Megan, we are we going?" asked Conner as he followed M'gann, or Megan, as she was supposed to be call in public, through aisle after aisle.

"We're getting...OREOS!" she exclaimed happily.

Conner stopped immediately, grabbing her arm and halting her as well.

"No Megan. It's bad for you and you know it."

"That was just because I ate too much! I can handle it if I only eat a little at a time!" pouted Megan

"Megan, please. I don't want you to get sick." pleaded Conner, worrying.

"Pleeaasee? I'll let you control how much I eat...Pweaaseeee?" she asked, testing out the 'puppy dog look' she had seen on TV.

Conner knew he was a goner.

* * *

"So, 25 loaves of bread. Check. 17 gallons of milk. Check. 13 cartons of eggs. Check. 5 containers of baking soda. Check." listed off Roy.

"And this is only what Megan will be using for her cooking. With Conner living at the ca-house, and Wally repeatedly attacking our refrigerator, we'll need a lot more food." stated Kaldur.

"This cart is already half full. We'll probably need two or three at the rate we're going at. Not to mention the price tag. We're going to blow at least a $1000 in groceries alone, not to mention the pizzas. But for all the trouble I'm going through, I better not be hearing any complaints from him."

"Hey look ma! It's a black speedy!"

"That's not speedy dear. He's black."

"That's what I said ma!"

Kaldur looked quizzically at Roy while the mother dragged her child away.

"What did they speak of? I'm surprised he mistook me for you-I mean Speedy, when I look nothing like you, no offense my friend. And what is this 'black?'"

Roy groaned.

_We need some sort of transitional class._

"Just forget it. I need you to get two more carts. Can you do that?"

"Of course."

...

_Now, where did those carts go?_

Kaldur looked around quizzically, a good ten minutes after he left Roy, before seeing one just lying there. It had a few items in it, but he was sure if someone left it there, they wouldn't mind. So, being the good natured Atlantean he was, he decided to carefully empty the items on the nearest shelf, noting the items in his head as he placed them back on the shelf.

_Chocolate. Cheese in a can? Ah, yes the food Wally loves. Carrots. Apples. Tampons? What is this?_

As Kaldur looked at the package, his brow furrowed in deep thought, a wail broke the silence. Snapped from his thoughts, Kaldur looked down, and saw an adorable, and considerably angry, light skinned baby shrieking at him.

"Hush child. There is no reason to cry. I am Kaldur'ahm from Atlantis, and I bring you no harm."

The shrieking continued.

"Please cease and desist in this shedding of tears, child."

The baby neither ceased nor desisted. And seconds later, a louder, and considerably angrier scream pierced the air like daggers.

"Stay away from my baby you hooligan!" screamed the mother towards the African American looking fellow dressed in a Speedy costume while holding a box of tampons in his hand.

"Ma'am, I wish you no-"

The woman's purse made contact with Kaldur's head and sent him reeling for a bit.

"HEEEELPPP! SECURITY! SECURITY! KIDNAPPER!" yelled the woman

"Madam, I sense you are feeling troubled. I should probably go and-"

Kaldur fell to his knees clutching a rather sensitive organ of his that had just been kicked, _hard. _His vision was spinning and his throbbing as he felt a pair of strong arms grab him roughly.

* * *

"Where the hell is Kaldur?" barked Roy angrily as M'gann and Conner came up to him with two dozen boxes of Oreos.

"I don't know." replied M'gann simply, as she snuggled her cheek against a box of Oreos, or, as she like to call them, "My little O's."

Roy was beyond angry at this point, and his knuckles turned purple as he gripped them tightly, ready to scream every profanity he knew into the Martian's face. He had had to go back to get another cart of his own, shove it full of every kind of food, and then push both around the store while getting weird looks from just about everybody. And he was pretty sure Security Guy #Tall, Dark, and Wannabe Cop was tailing him around the store.

"I hear him." said Conner

Sure enough, Kaldur was seen seconds later, being dragged from an aisle and towards the entrance by two security guards as he protested about how he was "just looking for a cart" and "was attacked by that disturbed woman". Following the trio was said woman, pushing her cart and baby while chatting angrily with a distraught looking manager about "keeping punks out of this store".

_Of course. Of course. This is what I get for sending the Atlantean to fetch the cart._

M'gann broke cheek contact with her Oreos for a moment before looking curiously at Kaldur, and then returning to snuggling with her Oreos.

"Let's just check this stuff out. It'll hold us over until Tornado get's more food. All we need to do know is get pizza."

...

_$1589.32. And this isn't even supposed to last the cave two weeks. Damn. I'm glad I don't pay their bills._

As Roy exited the store, followed by M'gann and Conner, they saw Kaldur waving at them from the street sidewalk, outside the parking lot.

"What the hell Kaldur? Get over here!" yelled Roy

"I cannot my friend. The security escorted me off the premise, and told me to stay off their property." replied Kaldur

Roy nearly cried. He probably would've if he wasn't in public.

Luckily, the pizza place was across the street.

"Just, just wait over there for us!"

...

Even buying the pizza couldn't be simple. No, no. Because M'gann just _had_ to check and question _every single_ topping there was available in the place. And this joint just happened to boast about having more toppings than all the other pizza places in Happy Harbor, _combined._

It was at this point, right after the 23rd rude grunt from the next customer, and 13th glare from the cashier lady his way, the same lady that had been checking him out when they entered, that Roy was seriously considering using lethal force on the Martian. Hopefully she would get the message if he let his thoughts roam.

"And parmesan cheese is different from cheddar how?" she asked in between her 7th and 8th Oreo.

Apparently not.

"Really? Wow. Can you have Oreo toppings?" 9th and 10th.

"No? Oh well. What are anchovies?" 11th, 12th, and 13th.

"I don't think Kaldur would like that. Maybe we should-hey!" 14th, and 15th, before Conner grabs the Oreo box.

"We'll take 15 pizzas. Large. Extra Cheese. _No Toppings._" ordered Roy, capitalizing on M'gann's sudden distraction. He put an emphasis on no toppings, as he wasn't suicidal enough to risk starting another argument on toppings back at the cave. The last time he counted, Black Canary, Green Arrow, both Green Lanterns, and Captain Atom had been responsible for starting the last dozen, with most of them being started by Green Arrow and Green Lantern Hal Jordan.

And traditionally, all topping arguments quickly led to topping food fights. Which then led to pizza foo fights. Which then led to full on food fights.

It was a very steep, very slippery, slope.

* * *

Kaldur stood there watching a man dressed as a burger wave and flip signs around from across the street.

_How odd._

And then Roy appeared with Conner and a pouting M'gann, the three carrying a large number of pizzas.

"Kaldur! KALDUR! GET HERE NOW!" roared Roy.

"But the security said-"

"I DON'T GIVE A FLYING FUCK WHAT THE FUCK THE FUCKING SECURITY DID OR DID NOT FUCKING SAY!" bellowed the ginger, his dirty mouthed demon coming out as he approached the car, a minivan given to them courtesy of the Wayne Enterprises. To date, Roy, Artemis, and Robin were the only competent drivers of the vehicle, with only Roy being legally able to drive it. Red Tornado, Wally, Kaldur, Conner, M'gann were all responsible for destroying the SUV, pickup truck, sedan, and the origianal car, the convertible, that had come before the minivan. Some things just weren't meant to be.

"What is fuck?" asked M'gann

Roy banged his head against the door of the car as Conner's cheeks turned a light pink and Kaldur, still debating his options on the sidewalk, was lucky enough to not have heard the comment.

"Justgetinthecarsowecango" muttered the archer.

God knows what awaited them at the cave.

* * *

**I think this was better than just switching between the store and the cave. That said, leave ideas for what happens at the cave. You know you want to. ;)**


	25. Chapter 25

**Feeling under the weather, so sorry for the later updates. That and I had some trouble figuring out the plot for this chapter. Writer's block has arrived. :/ **

**Credit to Veritas1995 for the Zatanna host BG truth in this chapter. Huzzah!**

**Disclaimer:**

**Amanda: Since Frozencake is unable to do so, I am herewith informing the world that Frozencake does not own Young Justice. Thank you. And please, somebody sue him for violating several work laws. I mean, he has me working 24/7, underpays me, and-**

**Me: SHUT UP! She's a pathological liar.**

* * *

**July 10, 2:30 P.M, Mount Justice**

Wally belched, having just finished his four bread pickle-and-peanut-butter-pastrami-mustard-covered-sandwich. It was either a "work of art", as the speedster claimed it to be, or it was, as Roy put it, "a creation from hell made by his inner ginger-demon."

"That was the nastiest thing I've ever seen." complained Artemis

"Pfft. Wait until you've actually gone to a buffet with him." jested Batgirl.

"Eww. Mental images." joked Zatanna

"Don't trash the grand sandwich!" protested the speedster, wiping off a mixture of mustard and peanut butter from his lips.

"Girls, ginger demons, are we continuing this game or what?" asked Robin, impatiently.

"You seem eager to get back on track. I don't see why we couldn't take a break."

"We've already taken a break Wally. I'm refreshed and ready to fry your spandex clad ginger demon."

"Ginger demon? What the hell is that?"

"You missed a lot, Wally." smirked Zatanna.

"I'm lost." stated Wally, his confusion showing on his face.

"Of course you are." snorted Artemis, prompting a few laughs from the rest of the group.

"Seriously, let's get back to the game. We should probably reseat ourselves to spread out and stop the odds of the bottle at pointing at nowhere." reasoned the Boy Wonder.

"Sure" offered Batgirl, promptly getting off the couch.

"You two can break your little lap formation and sit here and here, opposite each other" she gestured, her natural leadership skill kicking in. Turning to Robin, she grabbed the Boy Wonder and promptly shoved him in between opposite the couch, behind the Wally/Artemis line of glares and awkward looks. Batgirl then, looking smug as ever, promptly sat down in between Wally and Robin, having accomplished her goals of separating Wally and Artemis to make it possible for them to face off, and separating Robin and Zatanna just to satisfy her evil glee.

"Alrighty, there we go. Shall I?" she asked, reaching to spin the bottle. As the daughter of Commissioner Gordon, as Batgirl, and as the only girl in the bat-family, it was her duty to outdo

The tension was palpable, as Zatanna was slightly miffed at the new seating arrangement and Wally was more than a little disappointed Artemis was no longer seated on his lap.

Artemis was happy to have some breathing space away from the speedster. She needed to get some fresh air, but that wasn't really an option now, was it? As for Robin, he was just in a really awkward place right now, and he didn't see any fathomable way out of it that didn't involve committing a felony. Or disappearing in a puff of smoke, surely to be followed by Batgirl and anger Zatanna.

_Women are just so complicated._

"Aha! Finally!" grinned Zatanna. The odds were in her favor as she was hosting Batgirl.

_Maybe the new seating arrangements aren't so bad after all..._

"I'll pick truth." stated Batgirl, not even waiting to be asked.

"Party pooper." muttered Artemis in a playful tone.

"Truth it is, Batgirl. What is the nature of your 'relationship' with Wally, particularly centered around the specifics of your kiss."

Batgirl was still smirking, having already predicted the plausible questions from each person, except Robin.

"6 months ago. We were stuck doing recon at some fancy ball pretending to be kids of some obscure foreign dignitaries. Some snobby other dignitary brats ended up forcing us into a game of truth or dare, similar to this one, except much stupider. Somehow, Wally and I ended up in a stupid kissing dare. Romantically speaking, that's all. He's like an annoying super speedy cousin."

"And that's all?" asked Artemis, trying to sound innocent, but unable to hide a slight hint of accusation from seeping into her voice.

What? He was her husband after all. It was only her duty to be _interested_ in his previous relationships.

"Weeelll, I did find out his tongue _vibrates._..." replied Batgirl, letting the sentence trail off and hang in the air

Wally blushed a deep crimson and struggled greatly to avoid any and all looks his way, especially a pointed look he was receiving from a certain blonde archer.

"I-I, yeah. Just spin the bottle." he stammered.

"What ever you say Kid Smooth. Did I mention how good you look in a tux? You agree, don't you Artemis?"

More blushing from Wally, and a raised eyebrow from Zatanna. Artemis was silent, before answering.

"I have no idea what you are talking about. Kid Idiot looks perfectly stupid in a tuxedo, or a suit of any kind."

"Riiiight..._Perfectly _stupid..." drawled Batgirl, popping the p in perfectly as she reached for the bottle and spun it.

_Wow, this is as fun as Bette says. I should give her more credit._

"Now I'm just learning weird things..." muttered Robin to no one in particular.

"Oh, and it might just get weirder. And considerably more dangerous." muttered Robin

Even Artemis didn't utter a word, as the bottle, the evil bottle sent from Satan himself, pitted Zatanna against Batgirl.

"Time to die."

Well, no one actually said that last part, but it wouldn't have been a stretch if they had.

* * *

**Yeah. So this is what writer's block feels like...not my best chapter. Only one truth in the whole thing. I guess I'm going to have to make the Wally/Rob/Artemis/Zatanna/Batgirl cave experience two chapters. Sigh. Read and review.**

**AMANDA! Anti-writer's block coffee! NOW!**


	26. Chapter 26

**Yeah...I was kidnapped by the Finals/Writer's Block/MustDealWithAmandaLawsuit club. Not a very good week. Except for Amanda. Who is now considerably better off. And has apparently stolen all my coffee.**

**To reward ye for yer patience, and mainly because I like writing it, we have some more Roy/Kaldur/Conner/M'gann nonsense in the background.**

**And Batgirl isn't a jerk! She's just...meddling in a totally OOC fashion...which not my fault in any way.**

**Disclaimer: Boo. I do not own Young Justice.**

* * *

**July 10, Mount Justice, 2:40 P.M**

"Truth, or Dare?" asked Zatanna smoothly, as if she was unaware to the infectious tension in the room. Games like Truth or Dare seemed to be constantly testing people's nerves, and there was _no way_ Zatanna was going to show any hint of weakness before Batgirl.

"Dare." replied the redhead in an even more laid back voice than she had before, which, of course, only insulted Zatanna. How is not important, it just _did._

"Do you think we should intervene?" half-whispered Wally towards Artemis.

"Are you insane? Do you want to die?" she half-whispered back incredulously.

She took his silence as a no.

"I dare you to kiss Wally on the lips, for a full minute!" proclaimed Zatanna triumphantly, proud of being able to figure out such a hard dare with so little information to go on.

Batgirl looked stunned, her small smirk dissapering, but only for a moment before it returned. Bat's weren't supposed to show surprise. But apparently, that wasn't the same for archers or speedsters, both of whom were clearly surprised. Artemis however, regained her cool immediately, and just gave Zatanna and Batgirl sidelong glances, as if to say _really?_

"Pucker up Wallace Rudolph West." grinned Batgirl shamelessly, still keeping her composure calm and composed. She had good practice, being the daughter of the police commissioner and having to regular deal with Batman's cold demeanor and Robin's antics.

_I'm not losing this, whatever this is, to sorcerer girl. _

Wally turned a bright red as he started stammering out some words of protest, all of which amounted to what sounded like "Igawasnobaiya?"

Batgirl just shook her head at the flabbergasted speedster. Robin got his camera ready, but then thought better of it.

_Ew. A video of Babs and Wally...KISSING?!...Just...argh..._

His thoughts were interrupted as Batgirl got on her knees next to Wally, grabbed the back of his head, and locked lips with him.

* * *

A black minivan sped down Happy Harbor Main Street, followed by a blur of red and blue sirens that appeared to be a police car.

"I didn't know! This is all my fault." confessed M'gann from her position in the backseat of the minivan.

"Your damn straight this is your fault!" roared Roy, swerving to avoid a near collision with an much larger pickup truck.

"Hey, this wouldn't have happened if you hadn't told her that fuck meant hi!" said Conner, defending his girlfriend.

"Well you didn't help! And I didn't see you correcting me!"

"Let us remain calm. We should pull over." stated Kaldur from the front passenger seat.

"We can't do that! Not ONLY did M'gann here scream the f-word in front of the police officers, _repeatedly_, while waving at them, which I'm sure they mistook as some sort of attempt to rile them up, but you guys decided it would be a _splendid _idea to attack and take off with that guy" -gestures to a man hogtied, blindfolded, gagged, and ear-plugged in the back of the vehicle- " and try to drop him off at the police station. And now it turns out" -waves around man's badge "-that said man, is a _CUSTOMS_ officer! We've committed a felony!"

"I thought the man was assaulting that woman. He had his hands all over her!" exclaimed Conner

"It was a pat down. At the entrance to the _custom's office._" retored the speedster, a vein in his neck now alarming visible.

"If the man had been wearing a uniform, this might never have happened." pondered Kaldur.

"He WAS wearing a uniform. If you guys had bothered to wait for me to come out of the gas station, I could have told you so!"

"It didn't look like a police officer's uniform. It didn't;t even have a badge." protested M'gann weakly, as she started fondly at the bags of Oreo boxes in Conner's possession.

_Just a few would make everything feel so much better..._

"HE'S A FUCKING CUSTOM'S OFFICER!"

"Now Roy, that's the language that got us in this mess isn't it?" mediated Kaldur

* * *

Exactly one minute, to the millisecond, Batgirl released her lip from Wally's wiping her lips with the back of her hand and scuffing up Wally's hair a little.

"Not bad Wally, but you had better game last time. And I trust that _this time_ will also be the last time this happens." she says, managing to sound menacing and nonchalant at the same time.

"Well yes-err, she, but, ah..."

Artemis cracked a sly grin, choosing to ridicule the event rather than take it seriously, mainly because she wanted to ignore that nagging feeling in the back of her mind that kept telling her to kick Batgirl, who had never done her any wrong, in the gut, and kiss Wally, who _had_ done her wrong.

"Always speaking faster than your brain could keep up with, eh Wally?" she said, silencing the flabbergasted speedster.

"Please, can we just move on. This is just too weird." pleaded Robin, almost sounding desperate. Which meant he was _very_ desperate.

"Aww, feeling uncared for birdy?" teased Batgirl

"What? No! No, I just don't want to, argh! Zatanna, just spin the stupid bottle!"

* * *

"You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be held against you in the court of law. You have a right to an attorney. If you do not have one,-"

droned the police officer as he slapped cuffs on a one Roy Harper, who was being pressed against the hood of a vacant minivan that had just been T-Boned by the police cruiser. Well, vacant except for the kidnapped custom's officer.

Above the entire scene, the rest of the group were levitating with the groceries, hidden by M'gann as they conversed in their minds.

_We have to help him! This is all my fault!_

_I can smash a few cars and escape with him._

_I strongly advise against that Conner. This situation requires a certain level of ...finesse..._

_What do you have in mind Kaldur?_

* * *

"Well, I thought this moment would never come!" grinned Wally as he found himself hosting the ever so elusive Artemis

"When I castrate you, you'll wish this moment never came." threatened Artemis.

"Aw, but if you castrate me, you ruin a very fun aspect of our marriage." retorted Wally, before realizing what he said.

"Wha-I mean, no. Not like that! Because, I would never-" he backtracked.

Robin cackled at the scene.

"I pick dare idioso." interrupted Artemis, fairly confident that by catching him off-guard, he would foul up this attempt. She was alarmed when he suddenly stopped scrambling like an idiot and started grinning like he'd just received a Nobel peace prize.

"Oh, do I have a dare for you!"

"I'm so scared." mocked Artemis

"I dare you to wear my Kid Flash costume. Until I agree to let you out of it."

* * *

"Officer, ah, Kentac, here to transfer a one Ronald Harpoon." stated Conner, dressed in a police officer's uniform.

_These things are itchy. And hot. And Ronald Harpoon? Of all the fake names he could have used for his Happy Harbor's license...Hopefully no one recognizes him..._

"Oh, right this way!" offered the police clerk.

_Conner, are you in?_ asked M'gann telepathically.

_Yep. I'm retrieving Roy right now._

* * *

Artemis stood before the group, dressed in _Kid Flash's_ uniform, and glaring intensely at a drooling, yes, drooling, Wally.

"Wow. My, ah, hypothesis was correct." stammer Wally, wiping off the bit of drill that had formed on the edge of his mouth during his not so brief period of oogling at Artemis

"Hello? Earth of Wally?" said Batgirl, waving her hand in front of his eyes.

"Huh, what?"

"Boy, you've got it bad." chuckled Zatanna

"Got wha-No. _Any_ girl would look hot in my uniform."

"So you're admitting that Artemis looks hot?" questioned Robin, with a raised eyebrow.

"In that uniform, I'll admit to that."

"This uniform is too tight in all the wrong places, _and_ it reeks." complained Artemis, still glaring at Wally

"I'm sure Wally doesn't mind the first, and caused the second." snickered Batgirl.

"What is it with you bats and harassing people?" whined Wally

"It's too easy." replied Batgirl and Robin simultaneously.

...

"Weirdos." muttered Artemis while Wally reached for the bottle.

* * *

"I'm going to **_kill_ **somebody today." said Roy through gritted teeth as he drove the gang back to Mount Justice in a damaged minivan that may or may not have been reacquired from the police impound lot.

"Relax my friend. We have rescued you, and thank to M'gann's telepathic work, no one but us remembers a thing about anything that happened with us in the last 25 minutes. And I'm sure Robin will be more than happy to remove any video, audio, or pictures from any police databases when we return."

"Well...it may have been more like 2 hours..." muttered M'gann.

"You wouldn't have gotten arrested if you were a better driver." argued Conner, having now returned to his routine clothes.

His last comment was the final straw however, as Roy suddenly hit the brakes and swerved to the side of the road. Already muttering profanities, he got out, slammer the door shut behind him.

"What are you doing?" asked M'gann worryingly.

Roy didn't respond, and instead ran off into some bushes a few yards away, where then began thrashing around wildly and shouted every profanity known to man at the top of his lungs.

The 30 seconds between the start of his breakdown and when Conner finally covered her ears were very informational for M'gann.

"It's going to be a while before we get home." muttered Kaldur.

"And the pizza is getting cold." continued Conner, lamely.

* * *

"Truth or Dare Robin?" asked Artemis in a syrupy calm, and eerily frightening voice.

* * *

**So yeah. Credit to CathieeTerria for the Artemis in Kid Flash costume dare. Read. Review. Don't bash my skull in for not updating sooner. **

**Poor Roy. Err, Poor Ronald Harpoon. Actually, poor Happy Harbor Police Department. They can't remember a lot of things that happened in the last 2 hours. Now, MAKE ROBIN SUFFER!**


	27. Chapter 27

**Man oh man oh man...now I know you guys may be just a teensy pissed off, but blame my hectic schedule. Amanda quitting has really had a negative effect. Anyway, slight twist in this chapter that probably shouldn't have happened. So of course, I just had to make it happen.**

**And I just _know_ someone left the first dare of this chapter in a review somewhere...or at least I think I do. I can't find it. Oh, and did you really think the Babs Conspiracy was just going to disappear like that? **

* * *

**July 10, 2:50 P.M, Mount Justice**

Training with the Batman for the last few years had really honed his senses, so Robin was very aware of the near-homicidal edge to Artemis's voice. However, knowing Wally and Barbara for the last few years had also taught him that when the speedster had that stupid grin on his face, and when Babs was smiling slyly like that, backing down from whatever challenge was present was simply not an option.

"Dare."

"I dare you to tells us 10 facts about this Barbara person that none of us know." dared Artemis, abandoning her fake syrupy voice.

Robin scowled as Batgirl let loose a few amused chuckles. Of course she was enjoying this. What could be more entertaining that watching your teammates talk about your alter ego? Robin certainly knew this was true, as he had more than once amusedly took place in a dozen or so conversations about Dick Grayson and Bruce Wayne with other team members.

"This is a dare. You can't ask me questions about it."

"I didn't ask. I dared you to tell me facts."

"She has a point dude." agreed Wally

"You're just scared of your wife. I wonder Wally, what poor little you will do when this game is over and you two aren't married." snapped Robin

"Relax Rob. Don't be a dick." deadpanned Batgirl.

The two looked at each other for a few seconds, and then burst out in laughter, the inside joke remaining between them. Their baffled teammates just looked on.

"Did I miss something?" inquired Zatanna.

"No no. Just a joke; well, more of a running gag. It's actually more complicated than it seems." answered Robin, his befuddled answers doing little to help anyone and only increasing Batgirl's amusement.

"Well, are you going to do the dare or not?" asked Artemis, steering the conversation back on topic.

"Nope." replied Robin, popping the 'p'.

"Why not?"

"Please, speak to my legal counsel." he replied, gesturing causally to Batgirl who now wore a solemn expression on her face as she looked directly at Artemis.

"As the legal counsel of Mr. Dick Robin here, I would like to point that in order to demand a truth from my client, he must have chosen truth, thus enabling you to question him. Seeing that my client did not choose truth, and rather chose dare, I am afraid that you are in violation in ToD Bylaws B-56 Bisection 3, which expressions states that a dare must be an 'action', and thus not a question."

"I am daring him to do an _action_! The action of telling us things about Babs!"

"That is null and void."

"That makes no sense!"

"I'm afraid that this conversation is over. Please change your dare, or move on."

"Robin!" growled Artemis.

"My client will not be speaking to you." concluded Batgirl.

Artemis was about to start swinging at the barrage of holes in this make-shift "legal defense", when Roy walked, no, _stomped_ into the room walking angrily past everyone to take his seat at his couch, now next to Robin and Batgirl.

"Goddamn little uneducated, uncivilized, underage, sons of-"

"And a good day to you two, Roy." jested Robin

"We're back. I must say, grocery shopping is...quite the experience. And I do believe this costume is starting to stick to my skin." entered Kaldur, followed my Conner and M'gann, who telepathically put everything in the kitchen and placed the pizza on the ground.

"Guy's you're ba-"

"PIZZA!" roared Wally, cutting off Zatanna and grabbing three whole boxes for himself.

"I swear to god Wally, you so much as take one more piece, I'll make it my personal mission to end your time on Earth." threatened Roy menacingly as he grabbed himself a box.

"What got into you?" asked Batgirl as she joined the small feeding frenzy encircling the pizza boxes.

"He was arrested. And Robin, we need you to erase some footage." stated Conner flatly.

"Awestwed?" asked Robin with a mouthful of pizza.

"Hey, no toppings?" asked Wally, only to be met by a bunch of hard glares.

"Yes, arrested. Now don't ask questions, and get your scrawny self back across from me so I can continue torturing you." answered Roy, before Conner could reveal any more details.

"Actually, we are in the middle of a complicated legal battle." pointed out Batgirl

"Legal battle?" asked Kaldur

"I dared Robin to tell us ten things we don't know about Babs. He refuses, and Batgirl is saying it's illegal or some such nonsense."

"Why not just give him another dare? Isn't it wrong to speak of this Barbara in such a manner while she is not here, anyway?" questioned Kaldur

"It's the principle!" countered Artemis

"Why do we keep coming back to this Babs topic all the time?" whined Wally

"Because your socks stink." muttered Roy

"How does that even make sense?" asked Conner.

"Argh! Can we just move on from Babs!" groaned Zatanna

"Nevah!" swore Roy

"How does anything ever get done in this place?" pondered Batgirl

"I'M SPINNING THE BOTTLE." shouted Robin, grabbing everyone's attention and silencing the room.

"So shut your mouths, grab your pizzas, and get in your seats." he concluded.

The others obeyed, quickly scrambling for seats. Roy was quick to put Artemis and Wally back together (he was in a foul mood, and needed to take it out on someone). Kaldur ended up near the couch Zatanna was on. M'gann, who was attacking her pizza with surprising gusto, & Conner, who was doing the same, ended up together once more, and Robin, Batgirl, and Roy ended up filling the gaps.

Finally, with everyone now in their 'new and improved' seating locations, Robin gently placed the bottle down on the ground, and then spun it. He was trying to calculate it so that Batgirl would end up being dared by the married couple across from her, who were currently discreetly whisper bickering about something involving "vibrating legs." From the blush on Wally's face, he wasn't enjoying the conversation, although Artemis seemed to be enjoying it just a little too much.

_Crud._

Robin groaned inwards as he realized he had miscalculated. Now, Zatanna was going to pay for his mistakes.

"Truth or Dare Zatanna?" asked Roy gruffly in between mouthfuls of super cheesy pizza.

"Dare." she replied calmly, happier to be fallen victim to the bottle than be forced to listen to talks about Barbara this, Barbara that, all day long.

"I dare you to use a spell to find where this Barbara person Robin is talking about is located."

_Greeaaat. More Barbara talk. Who is this girl?_

"Ah, you can't do that! A gross violation of privacy!" protested Robin, as Batgirl's smirk turned into a straight line.

"I'll do it, but only if you guys agree to put an end to this absurd semi-obsession with the girl!"

"Done." said Roy, except he was eating pizza, so his sounded more like "Daoin"

As Zatanna started chanting a spell and closing her eyes to focus, Batgirl's mind whizzed around, thinking of something, _anything_ to stop this from going through. She came up with exactly three options, all of which would most likely make everyone in the room think she was insane, or a downright jerk. But Batman wouldn't tolerate identity exposure. Especially not within _three hours_ of joining the team.

Batgirl moved her hand towards her utility belt, preparing to whip out more than a few noxious gasses.

Then Zatanna's eyes flew open in shock, and she knew the game was up.

"What?" asked M'gann, eating a slice of pizza she had telepathically shaped into cow.

"She's in _this _room." said Zatanna, almost whispering as she realized that she had just discovered the identity of their newest team member.

This time Robin didn't even try to hide his groan, and Roy didn't even bother stifling his laughter.

_Well, it was fun while it lasted. _thought Batgirl, or rather, _Barbara_ as all eyes turned to her.

Whipping of her glasses to reveal blue eyes, she just shrugged her should and said "Batman is going to kill me when he finds out I blew my cover so quickly."

Artemis choked on her pizza, and Zatanna burrowed her eyebrow in thought. She could've sworn she that face somewhere.

_Maybe TV?...Maybe..._

"Hi Artemis. Good to see you too. And your pseudo-husband here." deadpanned Barbara to her recovering friend.

_Wait...it can't be..._

"Barbara Gordon? As in, daughter of Gotham police commissioner Jim Gordon?!" asked Zatanna incredulously, taking the words right from Artemis's mouth.

"And the other dominoes keep falling."

Realization hit Artemis even harder, as she looked in shock from Barbara, to Robin.

_The trolling...the wordplay...going to Gotham Academy...the same taunting on both sides...Which means Batman's...woah...Which means Wally knew, and DIDN'T TELL ME?!_

Robin, er, _Dick_, saw the realization plastered on her face, and he knew he would be having a long talk with Batman soon enough.

"Weeheeheelll. This has certainly become faaar more interesting, hasn't it?" asked Roy, already beginning the treacherous journey up Trouble Mountain.

Artemis ignored her sibling-like archer and abruptly got up, stomping over to Barbara and grabbing her up by her arm.

"We need to talk. Now."

"I really don't see why-"

"I'm coming too." interrupted Zatanna, her arms crossed over her chest and a determined look on her face.

"Good god people, lets just-"

"Oh! Oh! I want to come too!"

Barbara just sighed and admitted defeat to herself, allowing the three to drag her out for a round of questioning.

...

"So, now what?" questioned Kaldur.

"Now, I send Roy's mug shots to Oliver." hissed Robin.

"You _wouldn't dare!_"

"I just did."

"Argh!"

Roy jumped for the nimble acrobat, who flipped out of his way and began taunting and jeering the archer as he evaded the following attempts at escape.

"So, how long is this going to last?" asked Kaldur.

"Quite sometime. Robin's kind of pissed at Roy for screwing over Batgirl's secret I.D" answered Wally.

"So...did you know?" asked Kaldur tentatively

"Yup."

"So you know Batman and Robin's identities too?" asked Conner.

"Yup."

"So...exactly how messed up is Robin's, as you surface-dwellers say, 'love life'?" asked Kaldur

"Right now, pretty messed up." replied Wally

A distinct clattering could be heard in the background, followed by a roar of fury, what sounded like a small explosion, and a signature cackle.

"We should really stop playing this game. It's doing more harm than good." thought Conner aloud.

"That is true, my friend." agreed Kaldur

The cackles drowned off into the background like echoes while the three ate their pizza slices in relative silence.

The calm before the storm.

* * *

**Eeep. I did it. Let the record show, only Artemis, Wally, and Roy know the whole Batfam's identity, and Artemis just figured it out. Is she gonna be psised at wally? Probably. Are Zatanna and Artemis going to grill Babs while M'gann "learns?" Probably. Am I out of it? Definitely.**

**Read and review. Don't worry, I'm not abandoning this story.**

**Besides, I'd sooner botch up the ending and anger all of you than simply abandon the story and give you flickers of hope that I'm continuing it. 'Cause I'm cruel like that. :P**


	28. Chapter 28

**I got a small time window to write this. And The Richmaster, good point. I overlooked that, so we'll just say he didn't want to risk Artemis getting mad at him for some reason or the other.**

**And as per the request of Veritas1995, Conner will dare someone to do something. And I mean that in the most literal sense.**

* * *

**July 10, 3:00 P.M, Mount Justice**

"We want answers! NOW!" yelled Artemis as she shone a lamp on Babs, who was confined to a chair and desk in one of the storage rooms with horrible lighting.

"Ow! That's too bright. And you haven't even asked any questions. Honestly, if you want to get any good at this interrogation stuff, you should practive more often." chided 'Batgirl'.

"So _you're_ the partner of that little troll?!"

"What is your relationship with Robin?"

"You kissed Wally?"

"Are you and Robin dating?"

"And why did Wally know all this before me?"

"Have you ever had any romantic relationship with Robin's alter ego?"

"Why does _Wally,_ of all the people on the planet, have the right to know this anyway?!"

Babs rubbed her temples as the questions barraged in from Artemis and Zatanna, both of whom were obviously more interested in "their men" that in her secret identity.

_Why do I always find myself in between Dick and women he knows?_

"Hey, are you even paying attention?" asked Zatanna angrily.

Barbara sighed, before answering quickly. "Yes, No, Yes, No, Because Robin told him, No, and refer to my fifth answer."

Artemis and Zatanna paused before a second, before continuing to glower at their "captive."

"You're really annoying, you know that?" stated Zatanna

"I'm a bat. It's mandatory." deadpanned Babs

"Back to the important thing! Wally's tongue _vibrates?_"

Zatanna facepalmed.

"Yes, and to be frank, it's just weird. But I'm sure _you'd _be into that sort of thing." clipped Barbara, causing Artemis to blush profusely and stammer a denial.

"Can we focus on what's really important!" exclaimed Zatanna

Suddenly, M'gann, who was sitting calmly at the back of the room and eating her Oreos, suddenly dropped the delicious cookies and rushed forward, pushing Zatanna and Artemis aside. She shoved the lamp off the table, grabbed the table, and threw it at the wall. Then, quick as a flea, she shoved her face in front of Barbara's, grabbed her collar, and yelled at her in a rather scary voice that she had been working on for some time.

"QUIT WASTING MY TIME! TELL ME WHAT I NEED TO KNOW!"

...

Babs blinked after several long seconds, more than a little shocked at the turn of events.

Surprisingly, it was Zatanna who was the first to speak.

"Someone found out about Jack Bauer..."

* * *

"Come out you little troll! I can feel you in here!" barked Roy as he scanned the training room warily, bow and arrow at the ready.

He had a bloody nose and his shirt was shredded, but he was still angry and at full operative capacity. And he was going to impale a certain birdy for ruining his favorite shirt and sending Oliver the mug shot, which now doubt have him all "touchy feely" about "needing to work out problems together" and other nonsense.

Then he heard a familiarly nerve-grating cackle, and looking up, he saw Robin swinging out of the room.

"Damn you!" exclaimed the archer as he let loose a concussion arrow, which, of course, missed it's target.

"Stand still!"

"Never!" cackled Robin

* * *

"So...now what?" asked Wally, who was now, having finished all of his pizza, contemplating the risks and probabilities of being murdered by the occupied women, deranged ginger, or evasive bird who had left the living room.

"I suppose we could watch some television." offered Kaldur

"Nah. The TV's broke, remember?" reminded Conner.

"Right. Apologies."

"I know! We could continue the game!" piped Wally, enthusiastically.

"Really? Of all the ideas, _really?_"

"I must concur with Conner. This game does not seem to have been a wise choice."

"Hey! We were bored this morning! Now look! It's been about seven hours, and we haven't had this much fun in nearly a month!"

"If this is what you use to define 'fun', then I have grave misconceptions of the surface world."

Wally sighed.

"Look, I'm spinning the bottle. We'll have to carry on this game, whether or not you want to do so!" finished Wally triumphantly, as he reached forward and spun the bottle.

It landed on no one. To host no one.

"Perhaps our seating arrangements simply don't go well with the game." pondered Kaldur

"No! This can work!" insisted Wally spinning the bottle, only to face the same result.

Naturally, he spun it again. And again. And again. And again.

Grunting, Conner smashed his fist down on the floor, causing the bottle shake and wobble mid-spin, before stopping. As if to show a sign of respect or gratitude, it stopped in a position that made Conner Wally's host.

"That's how you do it." he said to Wally.

"No fair! You put a dent in the floor!"

"You would've caused a circle to wear right through the carpet if you had your way."

Wally just sniffed in return, feeling miffed.

"Well? Do I still have to ask?" asked Conner, annoyed.

"Well, it's kind of a rule!"

"Fine. Truth or Dare?"

"Dare!"

"I dare you to do something."

...

"Well?" asked Wally.

"Well, what? I dared you."

"You can't just dare someone to do something!"

"Isn't that the point of a dare?" countered Conner.

"But you have to be specific!"

"I was."

"Noooo, you weren't.

"Yes, I was." replied Conner, not looking the least bit fazed.

"Argh!"

* * *

"For the bajillionth time, I am _not_, nor have I _ever_ been dating Robin, or his alter ego, or Wally, or his alter ego as Kid Flash, nor have I been doing so through any of the convoluted combinations you two have been asking me for the past five minutes!" sputtered Barbara, gasping for air.

"But you admit that his face was shoved into your boobs when you were stuck in that safe once!" said Artemis, smugly.

"That was _one time!_"

"But it happened!" stated Zatanna bitterly.

"Argh! What do you want me to say? I'm sure your breasts will grow in size as you age? That I forced myself on him? That Robin and Wally are in love?"

Artemis, Zatanna, and M'gann stood aghast at the girl's comments, causing Barbara to groan in annoyance once more.

"Wait..._Robin and Wally?_ I-I mean, why would you-? Unless..." trailed off Zatanna, incredulously.

"You know, that explains so much." muttered Artemis.

At this point, Barbara began smashing her head against her fists in frustration.

"I'm not following." stated M'gann, confused.

* * *

The Bat-Mobile roared into the Batcave and came to a screeching halt. It's top opened, and out came a bruised, battered, and unbelievably frustrated Batman.

Bane had tried to rob a bank, and despite being taken down, had left quite a few injuries on the Dark Knight.

"Master Wayne, you must rest at once." scolded Alfred, appearing from nowhere.

"No time. I need to check on better things." replied Batman, as he took of his cowl to reveal the face of a one Bruce Wayne, Gothamite Playboy Billionaire owner of Wayne Industries.

Taking a seat at the Bat-Computer, he began typing quickly, ignoring the tray of food Alfred put besides him.

"You must eat sir."

"Later."

"Food is to be consumed at the present."

"I said late-"

"_Master Wayne._"

Bruce cringed, knowing that voice meant business. Sighing, he turned to the tray of food, and attacked it with a gusto he didn't know he had.

"See? I'm eating." he said to Alfred in between mouthfuls.

"I'm well aware. But chew with your mouth _closed._ It's rather rude to do otherwise." replied Alfred, although Bruce could detect a hint of underlying mocking tone in the curt reply.

"I have to compromise somewhere!" grumbled Bruce as he turned back to the Bat-Computer while chewing on his food.

_Ah yes. Mount Justice camera records..._

* * *

**Weaaall. This oughta' get interesting. But, my schedule is still hectic, so I'm sorry guys but updates are still going to take long. :( **


	29. Chapter 29

**Like all stories, the end to this one is nearing. Alas, woe unto me. BUT, I have plans to start another fic, more of a drabble, about interactions between the team members. Stuff like Wally/Roy/Dick antics, Roy/Artemis sibling-ish relationship, Kaldur and M'gann learning about the surface world and Earth, Conner dealing with the nonsense he has to deal with...stuff like that. I'll probably take requests.**

**Credit to Mystery Mango, ArtemisBAMF1218 (from a review for chapter 20), and Guest for the three dares of this chapter.**

**Onwards!**

**Seating arrangements,**** clock-wise: Zatanna, Robin****, Conner, M'gann, Roy, Barbara, Artemis/Wally, Kaldur, and back to Zatanna**

* * *

**July 10, 3:15 P.M, Mount Justice**

"So, we're all back were we started." uttered Wally rather feebly. He was eyeing Robin, Roy, and Babs very carefully, and for some reason, Artemis wasn't talking to him. Unbeknownst to him, despite how silly it sounded, she was angry at Wally for knowing. For knowing about Robin's identity, and Batgirl's, and Batman's, and not telling her. Yes, he had no reason to tell her and every reason not to, but if the man was going to wear Artemis boxers, then by god, he _ought to have told her._

"Yes. And you ate. All. The. Pizza." said Roy, through gritted teeth. His hair was tinted a darker, burnt color in some places, his face covered in soot, his shirt ripped in multiple places, his pants torn, and his ego shot through and through.

"I'm hardly surprised." stated Barbara, sans her sunglasses. She was boring two holes into Robin's forehead, while also ignoring Wally and planning a prolonged death experience for Roy.

"Maybe we should all take some time alone." advised Kaldur, as he glanced uneasily at the others in the room. He knew all too well what could happen if the team got out of hand, or at least, what was out of hand for them.

"Nah. Time alone is for scaredy-cats. I'm ready to get this game going!" retorted the Boy Wonder. He was being a realist, as in his mind, it was only a matter of time before Batman, OR Green Arrow, or both, came storming into the Mount, ready to set him and Roy on fire. If he was going to lose, why not go down in style?

He already had plans.

"We've wasted enough time on this stupid game. It's been what, seven hours now? I say we end it while this place is still in one piece. I have to go to sleep here you know." grunted Conner. He spoke his mind, which viewed the game as a stupid waste of time that had not only forced him to wear uncomfortable police uniforms, dance around like females, get a kilogram of ice in his pants, and put a serious hamper into his static-channel TV time.

"Come one Con. Let's just finish. This is the first time I've played this earth game!" pleaded M'gann, who couldn't really care less about what happened, so long as she got the experience. Being a chicken, walking around town like a goose, subjecting Kaldur to kiss other girls on the team; these things didn't really seem bad to her, just part of the game. Which is what made her so good at it.

"Fine. But ONLY four more rounds. Or I smash that god awful bottle." threatened Conner, but it was just mutter, although he did show the slightest hints of a smile, and a blush, when M'gann hugged him and gave him a quick peck on the cheek.

A chorus of agreed, and one barely concealed swear word (Roy) were echoed around the room.

"I'll spin the bottle first." offered Zatanna, as she prayed that this game came to an end without too much collateral damage. Besides, she needed to get a word in with Robin, now that she's managed to sort out her feeling for the Boy Wonder, and was positive that he and Wally weren't a thing, or that he had a relationship with Batgirl, or "Babs" (the nickname still annoyed her, although she couldn't figure out why).

The entire room, (except for Conner, who was actually yawning), seemed to be on edge as the bottle spun round and round...

* * *

**The Batcave, Gotham City**

The screen of the computer showed a paused image, streaming directly from a camera of Mount Justice. On the screen was the image of Batgirl, shrugging nonchalantly mere seconds after being unmasked by her teammates.

Bruce's eye twitched. It _twitched._

And then he took a deep breath and analyzed the situation. He'd watched the video at least 5 times. Robin's I.D was secure, or at least, he thought it was, as he didn;t have camera's in the girl's rooms (he wasn't that paranoid, and despite his reputation as a playboy, _ew_), and thus couldn't be sure that Batgirl hadn't revealed anything compromising. He doubted she did, but it didn't matter. He was going to lecture her to bed, and then lecture Dick to death.

"_Master Wayne!_"

Damn it. Alfred must've found his laundry pile. The man had been increasing his efforts to teach Bruce how to live by his own means, like a proper human being, should he, in his od age, be in someway forced to retire from his position at the Wayne Manor.

"_Bruce Thomas Wayne!"_

Bruce massaged his temple as he got up to deal with his surrogate father figure.

* * *

"Truth or Dare Roy?" asked Zatanna, a wary expression on her face. Roy was already seemingly unstable enough. There was no reason to push him any further.

"Truth." he replied, although his eyes never left Robin as he mentally calculated how fast the boy could move before he got an arrow off.

"Have you ever seen Black Canary and Green Arrow, you know...at it?"

It took a second for the question to register in his mind, before his eyes widened in shock and he turned to look at a somewhat sheepish and embarrassed Zatanna. Artemis however, was just as flabbergasted as he was, but only because she knew what his answer would be. After a few more seconds of deliberating a response, Roy decided to use his normal, sarcastic attitude.

"The better question would be, how many times have I not seen, heard, or even sometimes, smelt, their activities? I mean, they're like rabbits, which is why I take great pains to avoid walking past their room at night. Or entering the gym when they're 'sparring'. Or going on nightly stakeouts with them. Especially the later, because I end up doing all the work, while they go 'check the perimeter'. Why, I'd be willing to bet ten grand they're at it right now."

Zatanna nearly stopped breathing at his shameless response.

"Moving on." urged Artemis in a clipped, no nonsense tone that indicated that the subject was closed.

"R-right. Of course." stammered Zatanna as she spun the bottle once more.

* * *

**Master Bedroom, Queen Estate, Gotham City**

Two bodies fumbled around in a mess of sheets and blankets on a rather large bed in an absurdly large room. On a nightstand near the bed, stood a phone currently with one Unread Text Message.

Suddenly a feminine foot shot out and kicked over a lamp, also opening the text message, which just so happened to have an attacked picture of a mug shot of a one Roy Harper.

A man's chuckled could be heard.

"Keep it together will you pretty bird. We're barely starting."

"Shut up and get on with it!" growled the female.

A few moments later, and several tossing and tumbling, the two bodies fell off the bed in a heap of blankets and sheets, taking the nightstand down with them, and accidentally pressing the delete button to a text, prompting a confirmation request.

"I don't mind the change of scenery." said the man, and the woman just laughed. An erratic limb movement here and there, and the confirmation request was accepted, deleting the text message, all while the blond haired couple remained completely oblivious to the rest of the world.

* * *

"Wally, oh dearest Wallace. My brother. My comrade. Tell me, you ginger devil, shall you choose to answer a Truth, or answer the call of a Dare? Picketh wisely, for your wife shall be condemned to the same fate." asked Robin, in a taunting voice.

"Dare." both replied, simultaneously.

"Finally." muttered Roy.

"Weellll. If that's the case, then I have a dare for you, my friend. In the ventilation shaft of the 15th corridor hallway on the other side of Mount Justice, there are hidden exactly 17 gallons of butter. Using my carefully determined calculations of the surface area of this Mount, I assure you it will be enough for you and your lovely bride to cover this whole place, sans the private rooms, kitchen, and bathrooms, in liquid butter top to bottom."

...

"You've got to be mad." whisper-muttered Artemis

"I fight the Joker all the time. The man's a walking nutjob. You pick up a few things. Now get cracking."

Admitting defeat, Artemis got up and left to the butter cache, but Wally picked her up bridal style and sped her there using his super speed. Then, flashing one of his genuine grins, the ones that gave her butterflies in her stomach, her placed her gently on the ground.

"Ta da!"

She socked him in the arm and was going to do far worse, as well as give him a stern talking to, but then remembered she was mad at him. Instead, she had to go for ignoring his pouting and climbing into the shaft to grab out the milk jugs of butter. Roughly three milk jugs into the butter stash, she realized that Wally was being quiet. Too quiet. And then it hit her.

"Wally. Quit. Staring. At. My. Butt."

But what really frightened her was that, instead of being revolted, or even turning around to sock him in the jaw, she actually felt almost...prideful.

_Perish the thought._

* * *

"Oh this is rich. This, is rich." grinned Roy, as he thanked the Bottle Gods for giving him this glorious opportunity at redemption.

He was hosting Robin. The thorn in his hide. The bane of his existence, for today. The Boy Wonder. Soon to be The Dead Wonder.

"Truth or dare you miserable, maggot ridden, corrupted, god-awful, bat worshipping, playboy bird."

Robin frowned as if he was in a deep thought.

"Hmm...lemme think...I know! Dare!"

Kaldur pinched the bridge of his nose and shut his eyes, imagining himself writing up the bill that would ban this game from Atlantis for a millennia.

"You picked the wrong choice birdbrain. Then again, there really wasn't a right answer." threatened Roy, now smirking.

Robin was openly grinning.

"I dare you to take off your sunglasses."

M'gann and Kaldur gaped their mouths open in shock, while Conner yawned again. Barbara however, kept staring evenly at Robin, awaiting the next turn of events. There was _no way _he would willingly reveal his identity. At least not in a dumb game of Truth of Dare.

"Sure, why not?" replied Robin, as if revealing his secret identity was nothing.

"Robin, you don't have to do this." intervened Kaldur, grimacing at the lashing he knew Batman would give him if this dare was completed.

"Nonsense. See?" asked Robin, as he took of his sunglasses to reveal..._another_ pair of sunglasses.

"You've got to be kidding." muttered Barbra.

"So, what next?" asked Robin, grinning.

"Hey, does anyone smell that?" asked Conner, sniffing the air.

"I do believe that is the smell of butter." concluded Kaldur.

Suddenly, a whiz of red and yellow flashed by, leaving a trail of butter on the wall. And then it flashed again. And again. And Again.

"He's not going to have to do the floor is he?" asked Zatanna, quizzically.

"Why, of course he will." replied Robin

* * *

**Yeah yeah, you want to kill me for not updating yadda yadda. I want to kill me for not updating...but then I'd never be able to update. Read and Review, and thanks to all those who reviewed, followed, read, or favorite this story for their support!**

**But no, this is not the last chapter. **


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